Thursday Writing Essential prompt:
Many years ago when I was helping with our church educational program, our new pastor initiated a new marriage workshop for prospective couples and it became a favorite very quickly and is still used today in the marriage preparation.
Pastor Kurz, created a program that used a blank deck of cards which was presented to each newly engaged couple.
The game was called ANTICIPATIONS AND EXPECTATIONS and the point of the game was to show how different our expectations may be from our prospective mate.
The anticpation part was to point up how joyful the engagement period may be and how each partner as well as the extended family members may lend to the situation.
The reality as to expectations came out very clearly during the sessions and in result provided a much clearer understanding between the couples.
Each partner was to provide his own answer to questions based on categories that had to do with finances, child raising as well as others, and print the answer on each blank card. One partner does not see the others replies until the game begins and each person discloses his/her cards.
It was very surprising to the couples to realize how closely their expectations matched or how different they were. As the game was played the cards were placed in groups as to the matches.
The pastor did not dwell on anything negative or even positive about the expectations, only that it provided a clearer understanding of what each partner wished from their marriage and provide a picture of what they thought they would be contributing to the life they would be sharing together.
As a result of the game the couples realized how much they had to discuss in private as well as bring to the workshop and a greater understanding was accomplished.
As human beings, we have different expectations at different stages of our lives but the anticpation, I think, is what always keeps us young at heart and open to what is new and exciting.
The other day I was watching a situation comedy in which three teen grandchildren were making decisions for their grandfather as to his future.
They believed it was time for him to begin living since he had been a widower for quite a while and, in their estimation, had no life.
The difference in expectation was pointed up during the time the girls were on a senior couples dating site and were reading together the desires of some of the elders.
"Here's one for a lady who wants a gentleman for.....,Wheeeeeeew! Do they still do that?" cried the girls. Then they went on to a more docile advertisement that had to do with the woman still cooking in addition to excercising three days a week. The girls chose her because she was still cute and went on to get their grandfather a date.
I enjoy going over my life expectations for I still have many and a half-full or half empty (however one sees it) bucket list. I do, however, still believe that ANTICIPATION is and always will be 98% of the game......