When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand
to have the old man around. But when I got the be twenty-one, I was astonished
at how much he had learned in seven years. --Mark Twain
Mother to small son: "I don't care if our basement wall is cracking; stop telling
everyone you come from a broken home!"
On the first day of creation, God created the dog.
On the second day, God created man to serve the dog.
On the third day, God created all the animals of the earth, especially the horse,
to serve as potential food for the dog.
On the fourth day, God created honest toil so that man could labor for the good
of the dog.
On the fifth day, God created the tennis ball so that the dog might or might not
On the sixth day, God created veterinary science to keep the dog healthy and
the man broke.
On the seventh day, God tried to rest, but He had to walk the dog.