Poor Taylor Swift. First, Justin Bieber deletes their collaboration track from his wildly successful Believe album. Then, she gets the boot from Maria Shriver who has banned her from dating Patrick Schwarzenegger.
Yes, the former Mrs. California Governator has reportedly told the country darling to her face to keep her famous paws off her 18-year-old son. Apparently, La Shriver is afraid La Swift will "chew him up, spit him out, and then write a song about him as she's done with previous famous boyfriends." Ouch.
Of course, in all fairness, Maria Shriver has a point. So far Taylor has written songs about her exes John Mayer, Joe Jonas, and Jake Gyllenhaal. There does indeed seem to be a pattern there of kiss and tell. Or rather kiss and whine. On the other hand, in all fairness to the Pearl PureheartÂ—erÂ—Taylor Swift, she wrote those songs after the men in question had kicked her to the curb. If anyone got chewed up and spat out, it was Taylor. Not the other way around. Maria Shriver, however, was not moved.
"Maria got word to Taylor and warned her not to get any ideas about dating Patrick," tattles a source. "She basically told Taylor to 'back off'. Maria is worried that Taylor will lead Patrick on and then leave his heart shattered in a million pieces, like she's done with other guys. She's 100 percent opposed to Patrick dating her. He's entering the University of Southern California in the fall, and she doesn't want anything distracting him."
Taylor Swift? Shatter Patrick Schwarzenegger or any other man's heart? As if! If Patrick were a short, homely, stupid, poverty-stricken, anonymous virgin, Swift might be able to toy with his affections, but seriously now. She's not exactly Kim Kardashian, is she?
So far, there have been no reports of Swift's or Schwarzenegger's responses to Maria Shriver's warnings.
Â© Hope Carson 2012
Hope Carson is the author of 2 books: A Roaring Girl: An Interview with the Thinking Man's Hooker andA Thousand and One Night Stands: The Life of Jon Vincent. You can follow her on Twitter.