Prose Prompt: Write a short short story that is told via the device of interior monologue, that is, the thoughts going through one person's head. Keep it under 1000 words, please
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Doug, you fit right in here. I loved your Grape Nuts reference in the message. Also, because this is the first time I’ve responded to your prompt, I’ll take a bit of liberty with it. Oh, you should probably be aware that I regularly take liberties with the various prompts/challenges from the editors. I pretty much use your prompt as a “guideline” and write whatever I “feel” meets your criteria. For instance, here is “Walking to the Store.”
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What the heck am I going to write for his prompt? Why bother? Because it’s his first column and I owe it to him. Why? Shut up and let me think.
Thoughts, huh? I could rewrite that story from years ago about Billie or whatever his name was. No, can’t do that. There were other things involved that didn’t include thoughts.
Okay, so let’s think about how I write. Write what? Doesn’t matter. I’ve written so many things while I was walking to the store that I can do it in my sleep. You can walk to the store in your sleep? Stop it, of course I can’t. Hmm, that might be interesting. A sleepwalker that recreates something he did that day.
Or, a sleepwalker that does something at night without realizing what he’s doing and then the next day does… what? Don’t know, it’s your story, where are you going with it?
If I knew, I’d finish it. Sleepwalker, wakes up and finds himself in the store. Is he dressed? Did he remember his wallet?
Stop it. But think about if you woke up in the store and found yourself…
No! We’re not going to have me walking around naked anywhere, let alone in the store.
No, don’t go there or I’ll choke you.
Fine, how about something with the Fairy Council? No, those all involve massive amounts of dialogue, that’s not what I’m supposed to do.
Well, gee, you’re supposed to be a writer, can’t you write a Fairy Council story without dialogue?
Maybe Santa is sitting at his desk thinking about Shrek… or worrying about Shrek trying to take over the Fairy Council. How can anyone get rid of Santa and take over? Tim Allen did it by pushing Santa off the roof. Tim didn’t push Santa off the roof; he scared Santa and caused him to fall. Okay, so Shrek is thinking of some way that he can scare Santa. How? Maybe he has Donkey disguised as a reindeer and has him do it.
And none of the other reindeer notice that?
It’s a great disguise. Which reindeer stays at the North Pole and why? Rudolph -- Donkey takes Rudolph’s place. How? Jets, rockets, helicopter, air bag -- yeah, like a hovercraft. They only go up a few feet and Donkey will have to fly way up there. Okay, magic. Gotta be magic because everything in the Fairy Council deals with magic. Donkey does something to get Tinkerbell to sprinkle pixie dust on him.
Pixie dust? Fairy dust or whatever, look it up before we write it.
Gotta twist it. My last story had Donkey trying to throw out both Santa and Shrek and take over the Fairy Council. Why would he take Shrek’s side and get rid of Santa?
Shrek made a deal with him? No, because Donkey was madder at Shrek than at Santa. So Donkey figures Shrek is easier to overcome than Santa.
I’m here at the store. Do I remember what I’m buying? Can’t worry about it now, think about dinner and the ingredients will come to you.
Whoa, she’s hot! Suck in the gut, Max, smile. Didn’t help, she’s leaving without paying any attention to me, so I might as well go in and buy the goodies for dinner.
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NO! I don’t want a rigorous critique, thank you.