Several days ago, as I left a meeting at our tennis club, I desperately gave myself a TSA pat down. I was looking for my car keys.
They weren't in my pockets and a quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing.
Suddenly, I realized, I must've left them in the car. Frantically, I headed for the parking lot.
My wife, Lynn, has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition. My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them. Her theory is that the car will get stolen.
As I burst through the club doors, I came to a terrifying conclusion. Her theory was right. The parking lot was empty.
I, immediately, called the police, gave them the location, confessed that I had left the keys in my car and that it had been stolen.
Then I made the most difficult call of all. "Honey", I stammered. I always call her "honey" in times like these. "I left my keys in the car and it has been stolen."
There was a period of silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then, I heard Lynn's voice. "Jim", she barked, "I dropped you off!!" Now, it was my turn to be silent.
Embarassed, I said, "Well, come and get me." Lynn retorted, I will as soon as I convince this policeman I haven't stolen your car!!!!"