My family split over mission trip! Help!

If God wants someone to do something, he gives them the means. I know someone who wanted to go to a particular college. They said God wanted them to go. Their parents did not have the means. They thought someone was going to "drop out of the sky" and provide a full scholarship as well as living in the dorm expenses. I do not remember why they didn't take loans ... all I know is they did not go...

I think it is wrong for them to put this burden on you. You need to follow your heart on this. Why doesn't she take a job and save up her pay and pay for it herself??? If she wants to go, maybe she should be "grown up" and find ways to pay for it on her own dime.

Some how children "think" they know better what you should be doing with your money and then judge you.

My one son once told me when he was in high school that I was stupid with money. He said he would invest in Cd's. Without missing a beat I said, "Gee Chris, I thought you liked to eat" I was raising 3 children at that time and shopping in thrift stores because it was all I could afford.

People give out of love... when their heart feels the pull and if you don't feel the pull you shouldn't let them judge you like this, it's your money. I would imagine if you did write a big check, she went and something happened, you would be blamed for helping it happen.

I would imagine your view of this is much different than theirs because you probably have more wisdom than they do. Personally I think it's good she has a goal and she should put effort in working for and earning the money to go...

This ran through my mind...
Matthew 17:27 However, not to give offense to them, go to the sea and cast a hook and take the first fish that comes up, and when you open its mouth you will find a shekel. Take that and give it to them for me and for yourself.”

In this scripture God provided the needed tax money... Jesus told his disciples the way to get it...

Many times in my life when I needed something I got an unexpected check in the mail... and I felt God provided. If she is meant to go, God will provide...

God knows better than we do what lies ahead and he will open doors for us. Because you have concerns and reservations about this, I have a feeling there is a reason for it.

Blessings. Thank you. That is exactly how I feel.

I think if you didnt want to support $$ then fine,, yet if she really wanted to go,, you should not stop her,, calling you selfish yes that harsh yet blow that off,, no family should be in term oil for name calling ,, my mom called me a how for the longest time I knew I wasnt so I let it slid,, otherwise I would not of been by herside when she passed,,

When you say "Africa," that is rather vague. Which country? I've had friends (including the daughter of a preacher) from several.

I hate to break the hearts of would-be missionary teens everywhere, but the continent of Africa has more practicing Christians than the U.S. Since your granddaughter hasn't finished her education, she might not be aware of this fact, but Great Britain used to control most of the world.

She didn't say which country. She only told me Africa. That's a good point.

I think that's a pretty good tip-off that she's not ready to go off for any reason. Tell her to finish her education, including college (which often has excellent study abroad opportunities).

Oh, and tell her that if she goes to college and does well and wants to pursue one of those college-based study abroad opportunities, you'll help her make that happen.

I still agree with you that if she really wishes to go, she should raise the funds herself, through hard work. Mow lawns, babysit whatever. As my grandmother Betty always said, "God helps those who help themselves" You can't always expect a free ride through life. You have to earn respect.

I agree with Angela. If your granddaughter wants to go then she should want it enough to really work for it.

I do not think 18 is mature or ready yet. I am talking from my own experience with my own daughter. She is almost 20 and still not mature.

I believe this is her mother's dream for her daughter, but it is not mine. I don't think she has the maturity, but the other grandmother on the paternal side, just up and offered her money to go making me look cheap and selfish, and those are not my words. : {

If a family member asked me to contribute to a mission they wanted to go they would certainly have to give me more details before I would even consider the matter. Did she ask you to contribute cash in lieu of Christmas or birthday presents or just a flat out contribution? If she wanted money instead of gifts so she could save for this trip herself than I would be accommodating. I am not sure I would be willing to fund any trip that I had concerns over. Both your daughter and granddaughter should respect your decision and not condemn you for it.

Africa is darn big....where exactly does she think she's going?

I agree with you....and she should be finishing up high school first anyway. YOu could also tell her that she has to EARN (with a job) so much money and finish school BEFORE you will help her at all. As far as I can tell, she doesn't seem responsible enough to be going thousands of miles away.

If you phrase it that way, it's just not a flat out NO....lol

I am so sorry that your family called you selfish. I do believe that 18 is a bit young to go across the world. I know of 18 year olds that are mature enough to handle a long trip like that, but most are not. Can't see get a part time job to help pay for this trip...also what about her parents? I think if she feels it necessary to do this, she needs to help herself. She can babysit, get a job, etc. to earn extra money to help fund her own trip! Your granddaughter and your daughter need to respect your decision instead of call you names. In my opinion, you did the right thing.

Wow. They are being unfair. After all you've done for them, they should be grateful.

It's not selfish. I think that you're right really. If she had graduated or at least had a job and was trying to go but didn't make enough yeah it would be unreasonable to help. But her age and life style says that she only wants to go to get away and you're right something could happen. You don't hear anything happening in Africa but othe rplace have been having problems with Americans. What if they are too but it's just not being published?

You are following your heart and I'm pretty sure it's God that is putting your thoughts on the whole thing in your heart.

I think you are being very pragmatic, and you do have your granddaughter's best interest at heart. Why don't you suggest that your granddaughter start out serving a mission trip in the United States? There are plenty of people that need help here, and it is safer and less expensive. I know that www.youthworks.com has some very enriching missions for youth, my son participated in one last year. They are all within the United States, and he had an amazing life changing experience.