Our friend Carleen passed away this morning

Our friend and roommate (an important member of our family), and my daughters significant other, Carleen has died this morning at 10AM. She's been having problems breathing for the past year and the doctors never could find much though they told her she had congestive heart failure and acid reflux disease. Blah, she's been in and out of the emergency room A LOT and they just gave her pain meds and sent her home and ordered another test.

I am not dealing with this well and I have to hold it together for my daughters sake and for the sake of the children. The boys loved Carleen too, well, my entire family did and we are all just floored by her death. It was both unexpected and yet, not entirely a huge surprise.

Poor Carleen, we love you and we are going to miss you so much.

How does a person handle this level of grief? And better yet, how do you hold it together for the sake of the kids and my adult daughter who is just leveled with her grief?

Comments: 13

Rae M. Sep 25, 2011, 4:30pm UTC

I am so sorry hear that. I am sure it is very difficult. In these times I always say let your self grieve, cry, yell, scream do what ever you need to get through it. If you need to take a walk to a quiet park or drive somewhere to do it make sure you go and allow your emotions to come through somewhere away from your daughter, then come home and be strong for her. Don't forget to focus on celebrating her life. Again I am truly very sorry.

Ruthi C. Sep 25, 2011, 5:33pm UTC

I agree with Rae. Owning the feelings lead to healing. I am so sorry for your family's loss, for your pain.

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joseph k. Sep 25, 2011, 4:37pm UTC

i am sorry to hear this

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Rick S. Sep 25, 2011, 4:37pm UTC

So sorry for your loss.

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RedBird. B. Sep 25, 2011, 5:20pm UTC

Teresa, So very Sorry for your loss.
Blessings,Friend!

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Princess Spanky Pants ~ The Real, Original, Heather T Sep 25, 2011, 10:45pm UTC

I am SOO sorry for your family's loss. I know how much she meant to everyone. You are all in my thoughts tonight!

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Heidi S. Sep 26, 2011, 11:32am UTC

I am very sorry for your loss as well. Everyone grieves differently, you should do whatever feels right to you. Give yourselves all the time you need.

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heather "chickenlips" g. Sep 27, 2011, 1:13am UTC

I am so sorry for your loss!

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Tory H. Sep 27, 2011, 5:21pm UTC

I saw Shannon's post on Facebook and am so, so sorry. I hope that you are all doing as well as can be expected; you're in my thoughts.

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Ms Lee P. Oct 1, 2011, 12:16pm UTC

Oh how very sad. I am so sorry for your loss. It is always difficult to lose a loved one to death and getting over the grief can be difficult. You handle it by remembering the happy days and the joy she brought into your lives.

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Teresa W. Oct 4, 2011, 6:37pm UTC

Thank you so much everyone. I appreciate all your comments very much. We have been having a heck of a time grieving, all 5 of us and even the dogs and cat miss Carleen. Well, the cat belonged to Carleen because he had chosen her as his person so he's depressed too. We all miss Carleen so much, she was such an important part of our family. My parents and brother and his wife all miss her so much too. We've all cried buckets. We're going to have a private memorial service for her in two weeks, the 15th I think because Carleen's blood relatives turned out to be, well, let's just say, not good people, and won't be having a service and told us to never contact them ever again. No problem with that, the only one of the bunch that was a decent person was Carleen. Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you to everyone.

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Shannon W Oct 13, 2011, 11:44pm UTC

It's hard coping.

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Nora D. Oct 13, 2011, 11:53pm UTC

Oh my, I'm so very sorry for your loss......it's so difficult losing a loved one........crying is good......you need to grieve, it's good to show your feelings....sometimes it helps a lot just to talk about the deceased.......what about putting together a bunch of photos and making a collage or scrapbook? I've found that helps a great deal, plus you'll have a lot of memories in one place. Griefwork is very difficult, and it's important that you allow yourself enough time to grieve.....there is no "specific" time for it..........each person grieves differently.
This has been a very difficult week for us, as well...........we've had three deaths (of friends), just within less than a week.....and attended two funerals. Very, very draining, for sure.

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Our friend Carleen passed away this morning

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