Rumor has it that Charlie Sheen and his ex-wife Brooke Mueller are finally getting their acts together as hopefully clean and sober model parents. Alas, the same cannot be said for Sheen's Two and a Half Men character, Charlie Harper. Charlie H. is dead and buried. And now, secret photos of his funeral have surfaced as proof of his demise.
Yes, a tribute to the late Charlie Harper, Charlie Sheen's now gone for good character on Two and a Half Men, will air on September 19. The secret funeral photos feature a tribute to Harper's "trademark bowling shirt and shorts" which will hang on the wall of the chapel surrounded by flowers. According to TMZ, there's "no...coffin or...urn." So where's the body? Does this mean Charlie Harper's carcass was consumed in the fiery crash or swept away by the tidal flood or whatever it was that killed him? Or does it mean they just didn't feel like hiring a Charlie Sheen look-alike to play the corpse?
On a more interesting note, the funeral party will reportedly include "just about every memorable chick Harper nailed on the show since it began." Wow. Does that mean Capri Anderson will be there? And the goddesses? Oops. Sorry. That was the other Charlie.
Oh, well, R.I.P. Charlie Harper. Wherever you are.
Â© Hope Carson 2011
Hope Carson is the author of 2 books: A Roaring Girl: An Interview with the Thinking Man's Hooker and A Thousand and One Night Stands: The Life of Jon Vincent. You can follow her on Twitter.