SECRET HOLLOW....05.10.2011.....Barbara H.......

there's a misty place I take my heart

and now I bid you follow

where green moss pillows plump for seats

it is my secret hollow

a grand old willow makes his home

leans over a bubbling spring

and hanging from one gnarled limb

is a knotted, rope-tire swing

the sun steals through low pine boughs

in rays that measure ground

quiet birdsong, rustling leaves,

the babbling brook the only sounds

wafting sweetly, nectared fragrance

heady air fills the senses

we are free to run in fields

there will be no fences

swing we will, you and I

and neath that tree a wondrous bliss

for after turns at reaching high

we'll taste our first sweet kiss!

05.10.2011

Barbara H.

Comments: 34

JustMe ~I'm happy to be~ May 10, 2011, 8:22pm UTC

I LOVE THIS!

Barbara H. May 10, 2011, 8:24pm UTC

we must mine along the very same vein (smile)

JustMe ~I'm happy to be~ May 10, 2011, 8:25pm UTC

Without a doubt!

Kimberly Blackadar May 10, 2011, 9:09pm UTC

Michelle and Barbara, your posts are so similar. I love them both!

JustMe ~I'm happy to be~ May 10, 2011, 9:10pm UTC

Isn't that so cool, Kim?!!!!

Barbara H. May 10, 2011, 9:20pm UTC

I have good ideas for writings many times and now I feel I'm learning from the REAL writers on Gather like you and Kimberley and all the other WRITERS.

JustMe ~I'm happy to be~ May 10, 2011, 9:22pm UTC

Barbara, there is nothing more "real" about my writing than yours.

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Barbara H. May 10, 2011, 8:26pm UTC

thank you Michele.

David W. May 10, 2011, 8:35pm UTC

You have to move this under her comment or she will not see it. Now for me.

JustMe ~I'm happy to be~ May 10, 2011, 9:11pm UTC

I see it! :)

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David W. May 10, 2011, 8:37pm UTC

Lovely poem, I have my special place, but it is locked away. Someday I will put it on paper. Meanwhile I will live vicariously through yours.

Barbara H. May 10, 2011, 9:27pm UTC

Only for a while David (living vicariously) then you must share. Thanks dear friend.

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marie Pinschmidt May 10, 2011, 8:48pm UTC

Lovely, Barbara. One doesn't hear the word "hollow" much anymore. To me, it was a West Virginia word with small towns using it, like Coon Hollow. They also used "Bottom" in naming towns - like "Frazier's Bottom". So, you brought back a little of my childhood. I loved your poem.

Suggestion: Instead of "running" brook, use singing brook or some other word indicating sound?

Barbara H. May 10, 2011, 9:26pm UTC

Thank you Marie. I'll change it. Words are always interesting in what they convey. Thanks again Marie. You are one of those writers from whom I'm learning.

marie Pinschmidt May 10, 2011, 9:38pm UTC

We all learn from each other, don't we? The learning part of writing, or any other creative activity, never ends.

Barbara H. May 10, 2011, 10:16pm UTC

Yes, of course Marie, we share a part of ourselves each time we write or comment. Thank you.

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Chris Brockman May 10, 2011, 8:53pm UTC

Absolutely wonderful, just the kind of idyl we all dream of or hopefully recall.

Barbara H. May 10, 2011, 9:38pm UTC

Thank you Chris.

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Lawrence U. May 10, 2011, 9:19pm UTC

The last stanza takes the cake, so to speak. What a lovely piece, Barbara!

Barbara H. May 10, 2011, 9:39pm UTC

Aha! Another romantic!

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Kushal Poddar May 10, 2011, 10:08pm UTC

sun steals through low pine boughs

in rays that measure ground

I should quote this! Amazing.

Barbara H. May 10, 2011, 10:14pm UTC

Create your own writing from the image! Thank you, and please use any of my words that might inspire. I love your poetry.

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Heather E. May 10, 2011, 10:09pm UTC

This is beautiful.

Barbara H. May 10, 2011, 10:14pm UTC

Thank you Heather.

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Bernard C. May 11, 2011, 7:12am UTC

Very nicely put - well done indeed - thanks for sharing :-)

Barbara H. May 12, 2011, 7:11pm UTC

Thanks Bernard for reading and commenting.

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Jack Whitsel May 12, 2011, 1:45pm UTC

Excellent poem! I really enjoyed all the descriptive elements of the tree. Wonderful, Barbara!

Barbara H. May 12, 2011, 7:10pm UTC

So glad you enjoyed and thank you for commenting.

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Len Maxwell May 20, 2011, 12:29pm UTC

I love this place; I can see it and I want to be there. Well done.

Barbara H. May 20, 2011, 12:40pm UTC

glad you enjoyed Len.

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sara wojcik May 31, 2011, 7:29pm UTC

This is so nostalgic, Barbara. I don't know how I missed this poem earlier.
I wonder how many of today's children never know the joy of a swing strung from a big old tree in a lovely pastoral setting. Seems like all most of them know today is a plastic and metal playground,...just NOT the same.

I love the place you took us to!

Barbara H. May 31, 2011, 8:10pm UTC

Thanks Sara, I think it would be a greaat place to picnic with kids and set them free to explore.

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Ronald Brissette Jun 5, 2011, 7:35am UTC

I find myself holding back on saying anything critical as I am not that knowledgeable on how a poem is written. I just noticed that all the way through the poem you rhymed the second and last word until the last paragraph as you have the first and second and third and last that rhyme. Is this a new style or maybe I have not run across it before---I just think it breaks up the flow of the poem, you know like a song with a sour note. The poem itself is great and does let my mind drift off to my special place where a special event happed in my life as this was for you.

Barbara H. Jun 5, 2011, 12:03pm UTC

Thank you Ronald, for the wonderful critique. I hadn't even noticed that. I will scan the poem and try to reword! Absolutely no room for a sour note in a song! Thanks again for reading and letting me know about your thoughts. Two heads are always better than one.

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SECRET HOLLOW....05.10.2011.....Barbara H.......

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