The day I shot myself... A True Story.

     That morning placing the pistol upon my kitchen table brought back memories when first buying that dang thing. My children were small, playing with toys that would lay over all floors of the house. I missed my baby girls for so long that they are grown women now, missing them dearly every day although its been over twenty years since leaving. My wife packed her small compact car leaving behind two huge boxes to my right ,one filled with her stuff that either I bought her or would not fit . The other box were the girls toys brimming the top with dolls and other girlie things, I pulled my stare back to the loaded gun.

   One could not play Russian Roulette being that the chamber was loaded to full compacity. One pull of the trigger would send a blast having no mercy on the target entended. I gripped the pistol feeling the tension on the trigger while placing the gun barrel beneath my chin. I thought of how long carrying those memories with a family that did not care for me anymore, the girls quit coming to visit during summertime to now only a phone call when needing money. I needed to end those thoughts of lost love, no more memories bombarding my mind, day in and day out.

  I suddenly heard someone pulling into my driveway making me decide to end those memories of the past. I have to take this action or send myself into another year of misery. I remember not wanting to do this before the knock on the door but knew this had to be done. A knock came thundering my wood oak front door making me stand with gun in hand, the barrel nestled tightly into my beard.

  I pulled the trigger sending a forceful blast,hitting below my chin...........The water trickled down upon my shirt opening the front door questioning.

'' You the men from Good Will ? Those are the two boxes of memories I need out of here." tossing the water pistol on top of the box of toys.