Do you ever get tired of dumb TV ads? I know I do. Here are a few of the TV ads I really can't take.
Those cartoon bears selling toilet paper. They are still telling us how to perform daily personal hygiene. The latest shows Papa Bear, the blue version this time, in a head and shoulder shot with romantic ballad type music playing. Pan to blue Mama Bear, watching the TV, looking lovingly over her shoulder towards Papa. Back to Papa bear, this time showing that he is sitting on the toilet, with the obligatory TP roll shown. Then the viewer is treated to the demonstration "proving" that this brand is more absorbent. Folks, I don't need to see a bear doing his business, followed by a final scene of Mama and Papa snuggling on the couch watching the idiot box. Yuck.
Erectile dysfunction. Gaak! OK, so the world is now apparently comfortable discussing the heartbreak of ED, and all know that the little pill will kick in after a time. But wait! What about those times when a touch interrupts a common task and results in raging lust? No time to wait for that pill to kick in. Well fear not, gentle reader. The latest affronts to our senses are the ads for that ED pill that a man can take daily. He is doing something, it doesn't matter what. She approaches from behind, and they accidentally brush each others hands. Pause, stare longingly into each others eyes: You know what they are thinking. Then we see the mystic transformation of the house to a mountain top complete with tent, scenery and of course a campfire. Those daily doses must have some hallucinogens included. By the way, I don't get the two antique bathtubs thing.
Flo selling insurance. Either you love her or hate her.
Singing cats for a sandwich shop. This one is surreal. Glitzy costumed cats singing about the cheap menu offerings of a sandwich chain. The cats sound like they have snorted helium. The ad jumps back and forth between scenes at too fast a pace. What the heck are they talking/singing about? You get that there are different price offerings, but I can't understand those obnoxious squeaky voices. Maybe my hearing is as bad as my wife says it is.
The kid in a pet carrier. This just seems wrong. At the airport, a lady is bending over a pet transporter cage, inside of which is a little boy in a cheesy doggie costume, complete with painted on whiskers. Lady looks up at camera, and says "What? Is this wrong? Dogs fly cheap. We need the money for our cell phone bill." Enter two baggage handlers, each in overalls. One, a swarthy complexioned man who looks like a criminal mug shot, tells the lady to switch to the touted service and save money. Kid then asks Mom for a coloring book, and says he itches as the pet carrier disappears down the conveyor belt. Somehow this ad manages to insult everyone, including the viewer.
By the way, where does that cute green insurance selling gecko keep his Blackberry and wallet?