How do you feel whenever a guy promises he'll call you, but doesn't?
If you're like the old me, you may feel tempted to call him up yourself, asking
him what he's up to and why he isn't calling. After all, he kept you waiting
-- you deserve at least a straight explanation!
Well, at least that was what I thought when I was still dating. Little did I
know that this little knee-jerk reaction was actually RUINING my chances of
getting a boyfriend!
Sure, I often got the explanations I wanted. But afterwards, the guys started
acting weird around me -- like they didn't really want to be with me
Of course, now I realize exactly why. In calling them up and asking for an
explanation, I was basically NAGGING.
And as you should know by now, the real men out there can't really stand
But don't let me change the topic... today, we'll be talking about why men
have this annoying little tendency of NOT keeping their promises. There's no
single reason why -- that's why in this article, we'll talk about the three most
Reason #1 - They're being cruel to be
One of the reasons why men promise to call, but don't, is simply because
they're being polite. To be more specific, they DIDN'T really feel it for
you when you were talking and when he promised to call.
Of course, he didn't want to TELL you he didn't feel it for you. That would be
rude. So instead, he made a vague promise, both to satisfy you and to give
an excuse to get away from you.
Sure, you can say that it's pretty rude and immature of a guy to do something
like that. And yes, it's REALLY tempting to let him know that.
But seriously... why would you want to waste time with someone who isn't really
interested in you anyway? Why waste your energy trying to teach him a lesson?
So when a guy doesn't call you up, don't get worked up over it. Let it pass, and
keep living your fantastic life like nothing happened.
Reason #2 - They forget.
I remember getting a call from one of my girlfriends last year. I could tell she
was pretty worried.
She told me that her boyfriend of three weeks had cut their date short, and
promised to call her when he got home. He had told her that he had some
emergency work to do.
But he never DID call. And that drove my friend bonkers.
"Why isn't he calling, Alex?" she wailed. "Isn't he interested in me? Is
he seeing another woman? Should I break up with him before things get any more
Fortunately, her boyfriend was also an acquaintance of mine. So I gave him a
call to check on him.
It turns out that he went home, started working on that emergency project he was
talking about, and by the time he finished and submitted it, he was so
tired that he fell asleep. By the time he woke up the next morning, he had
totally forgotten to call my friend.
It was a totally innocent, harmless mistake. But it almost caused my friend
to break up with him! (It was a good
thing she called ME up, first!)
So don't be so quick to judge a guy if he fails to call you up as he promised.
If he's a busy guy -- let's say an emergency paramedic, a police officer,
or an architect -- then cut him a little slack.
Besides, the REAL men out there have bustling, busy careers. Trust me, you
WOULDN'T want to miss out on them simply because you "thought" they were seeing
Reason #3 - They're Players.
Now here's a sad reason. Some men are simply players -- they meet new women
left and right, and they tend to act on autopilot whenever they do.
And yes, sometimes they make these silly promises like "Sure, babe, I'll call you
So if a guy says something like that to you, don't keep your hopes up. He could
just as well have said those very words to the half-dozen OTHER women he met in
the past hour.
Besides, when a guy's a player, it means he's only in the dating game for the fun
of it. He isn't really ready or willing to handle a serious relationship, even
if he says he is.
Trust me, he's not.
So it's best not to waste your time on someone so flaky and unsure. Focus on
the real men out there, who take their commitments VERY seriously, as they
A Better Way To Make Them Keep Their
By the way, don't go thinking that this tendency of not keeping promises is just
a guy thing. I'm pretty sure you've done it before, too.
Have you ever had a guy you didn't like hover over you, trying to get your
number? What did you do to get rid of him?
If you're like some of my readers, you may have told him you had to go to the
bathroom -- and you left the bar.
Or you may have told him to call you at the number you just wrote on a napkin --
but it was actually the number to the local nuthouse.
See what I mean? I'm not saying you've done these things yourself. What I'm
saying is that it's not a "men-only" thing. Even we women do it too, when
we're pushed to our limits!
So don't get so worked up over it. There's a better way to make men to keep
their promises, after all!
And that's simply to make him realize that there's VALUE in keeping the
promises he makes. He should know that whenever he keeps his promises, he feels
loved and appreciated.
And it also helps when you come through with your own promises to him, too. When
you keep doing things for him, he'll start feeling obliged to go out of his
way for you, too.
And when both of you feel compelled to do things for each other -- even the
tiniest, silliest favors -- then congratulations. You've just stumbled
upon the recipe for a relationship that can stand the test of time!