Dear Mr. President - Here's My Advice

Dear President Barack Obama,
I know I haven't written for a while. Life gets busy sometimes. I did take time out to hear you speak at Ohio State University in October, and the words you and Michelle spoke lifted my spirits and renewed my commitment to work toward progressive goals.

But recently, right after the midterm elections, I have figured out what's been bringing me down about your administration. It seems to me, Mr. President, you're suffering from a condition similar to battered spouse syndrome. This is not to suggest that our First Lady is smacking you around and belittling your efforts. I've seen the two of you hold hands and embrace with smiles in public. I'm in a relationship like that.

It wasn't always like that for me though.

When I became a young adult and entered a serious relationship, I allowed myself to be taken advantage of. I had a job, he didn't, so I would pay for the date. I would rearrange my schedule and inconvenience other people to be with him. When we moved in together, I caved in to whatever he wanted. If I tried to stand my ground, he would get all upset and claim I didn't love him. Money that should have gone to building a stable future for our family went to fund his dreams. I thought if he got what he wanted and was successful and happy, he'd love me and then I'd get my turn to pursue my goals.

But instead of being happy, he became more demanding. The manipulation went from words to physical abuse. I had young children and that's probably the reason I snapped out of wanting to be liked or loved. The phony compromises stopped. The only compromised I offered was get out or find yourself dead. You see, Mr. President, I had to protect those who were more vulnerable than myself.

Now I see you afflicted with the same mental burdens I carried. You want harmony and you want to be liked, but you're betraying yourself to get it. You're willing to compromise, but you've forgotten the meaning of the concept. A compromise needs to contain an equal degree of fairness to all parties involved. It is not a compromise when you cave in to manipulation and pressure. At that point, you are submitting to being bullied. At that point, you cannot protect those weaker than yourself and they suffer the abuse too.

We had big dreams and goals in 2008. After years of being bullied, we looked to you for the strength to stand up to big corporations and billionaires who have taken the American way of life and sucked the essence out of it. We wanted to believe the we lived in a country where people didn't go hungry, homeless, and without health care. We wanted to turn it around and that's what we worked for and why we voted for you.

I don't regret voting for you. You didn't hide the fact that it was not going to be easy and that change was not going to miraculously occur overnight. You never told us we could sit back and put our feet up and magically reforms would happen. Many of us have put time and effort to support health care reform and to educate fellow citizens to the truths of what's really going down.

We also cannot stand idle while Mitch McConnell claims the only agenda the Republican party has now is to get you out of the White House. We cannot pretend we don't hear John Boehner saying the work done over the past two years on health care reform and consumer protections needs to be undone. These are not people interested in bipartisanship or moving America forward. You need to lead us in a chorus of "If you don't have any solutions to offer on the issues we are facing, then sit down and shut the hell up." We're out here saying it, but you could really help out the choir on this verse.

And believe me when I tell you this: It feels so awesome to stand up and put an abuser in his place. Side effects of this course of action include not getting screwed with again.

Best regards,

MJ

P.S. I wouldn't really say "shut the hell up." I'd use the F word instead.