Sideshow Fun ~ Movie Review of ‘Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant’

It’s getting to be that time of year when people start paying more attention to things that go bump in the night.  ‘Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant’ was in the theaters about a year ago and didn’t get the respect that I thought it deserved.  Really, it had all of the elements that one could want in storytelling; sideshow freaks and the undead.  Although I confess there were elements in the film that simply didn’t work, but this alone doesn’t explain why this movie died at the box office.  Perhaps people the world over were overwhelmed with vampire stories featuring much more handsome and beautiful actors (this isn’t meant to be disrespectfully to John C. Reilly because he was actually sort of handsome in his role of Larten Crepsley, but even on his best days he is no Alexander Skarsgard).

 

                  The storyline is simple, boy meets vampire, boy ends up vampire (actually, half vampire) boy comes to terms with life as one of the semi-undead.  Along the way he meets a monkey girl and has to deal with his best friend who feels abandoned because wants to become a vampire too.  Beyond the story teen bloodsucker angst, is also a tale about vampire politics and a very special carnival.  Within this carnival is a bearded lady played by none other than Salma Hayek (I know, the first person you think about when the topic of bearded ladies comes up…of course she did sport a mustache for ‘Frida’) along with an assortment of interesting people/creatures including Ken Watanabe, Ray Stevenson, Willem Dafoe, and Patrick Fugit.  Speaking of Fugit, do you remember him from ‘Almost Famous’?  What happened to his career?  I like him, I hope he gets better roles.

 

                Where the movie falls flat is with the two best friends played by Chris Massoglia and Josh Hutcherson.  Neither of them had much charisma in ‘du Freak’ although Hutcherson’s has grown on me since seeing him in ‘The Kids Are All Right’.  Honestly, I think those two roles were miscast. 

 

                Another issue is that the title is horrible.  Either call it ‘Cirque du Freak’, well don’t do that because then it sounds like an independent film with subtitles and bad music, or call it ‘The Vampire’s Assistant’ which makes it sound like a story that anyone who is remotely interested in vampires might give a second glance.  ‘Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant’ is just too long and drawn out and audiences know with certainty beforehand (let’s face it we always are aware that if a film is successful than a franchise is born) that the filmmakers are setting the storyline up for a sequel – speaking as an avid filmgoer, I don’t want my movies to get cocky and act as if a second installment is guaranteed.

 

                The movie is an adaption of the ‘Vampire Blood’ trilogy from ‘The Saga of Darren Shan’ young adult book series (thus far there are 37 books in this UK series, yet the film was set in the US).  Frankly, I’m always unsure when a popular series is taken out of its culture of origin.  I mean, what would Harry Potter be like if the films were set in Los Angeles?  Perhaps, the ‘Little House’ books all reshot on an African savannah?    

 

                I would recommend seeing ‘Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant’ on DVD or cable especially since Halloween is on the horizon.  I didn’t think it was a great movie, but I didn’t think it was horrible (you don’t know how tempted I was to write ‘sucked’).  Regardless of how I felt about it, I’m pretty sure that there will not be a sequel – its production budget was forty million and it made just under that amount worldwide. 

 

Westerfield © 2010