Going through a lot right now

I went to the doctor yesterday to get help with my bipolar meds. as I am going through some personal things right now that is causing me great emotional pain.  All along I'm thinking he is only going to adjust one of the main meds. I'm on already.  But no, he decides to put me on a drug called Risperidone to somewhat sedate me through this for a temporary fix.

My son was on this medication a few years ago and he lay on the couch for three days awake some of the time, but pretty much out of it.  I ended up taking him to the hospital and when his blood test results came back, they found three times more in his system than should have been for a boy his size and age.  The prescription bottle stated for him to take one milligram in the morning and two milligrams at night.  He was basically slowly dying.  We stopped the medication immediately and to this day he only takes one pill a day which is a mood stabilizer. 

I took one when I got home and slept from 5pm. until 9pm.  Then I took another one and slept from 10:30pm. to 10am.  ( I was actually supposed to take two at night, but I am surely glad I didn't or I would probably still be asleep.) 

Anyway, I think I've just decided to stick with what I've been on and maybe only use the new medicine as an emergency only pill.  I realize many of you will say, " but you should always take medicine as prescribed."  Well, let me just say that when you ever take a pill that you cannot stay awake while taking, unless it's only for a sleep aid, you never want to feel that way again.  I don't care what the doctor says.  I know what my body is telling me and it's screaming, "NOOOO"! right now.