"I don't like taking pictures"

It was six months before August, freezing outside, and I had just thrown a party.

Four in the morning and I'm sitting on the kitchen floor with the lights off and a Jack and coke. Me and my roommate are leaning against the cupboard doors under the sink. We had just decided that we would move to California at the end of the summer.

"You wanna fly?" he asked me.

"Fuck it," I said, burping, a little hiccupy, "we'll drive it."

"Across the country?" he said, "In who's car?" because neither of us owned one.

I hiccupped and the back of my head hit the doors. "We'll buy one. Why not? This place sucks. This party sucked."

My roommate pulled a joint from his pocket, "No, man, the party was good. Did you see Jay?" as if that proved a point. He fumbled with a lighter.

"We can stop anywhere we want. New York, Vegas, whatever's in between—"

"—Cincinnati."

"Whatever. Some place like that, I guess. Just anywhere, really, is the point."

My roommate held in a toke, "My mom's gonna want a lot of pictures," exhaled.

I burped and the taste of stomach briefly stung my nose. "I don't like taking pictures. I never remember to and when I do," burp, "it's such a fucking chore."

Eyes slit, he says, "You gotta show people what you do. Driving to California, you gotta let people know what's going on. Emails, facebook...Reddit."

"I'm not writing any emails," I said, "and I'm not carrying a camera around with me all the time." I sat up, "I know what we'll do," and looking back on it, I don't know why I thought that what I was suggesting was any easier, but I just really didn't want to have to take any pictures. So, head ached and about five minutes away from a very memorable vomit, I said, "We'll film it."

"But that'll be boring," he said, "no one likes home movies."

I shrugged, "Well then we'll script it."

BEANS is a comedy web series shot in seven parts. Each episode is under 10 minutes, has its own storyline and was, for the greater part, improvised. A lot of the production time was spent in the back of our newly acquired van, drinking Red Bulls and editing the footage into one coherent plot. I am very proud of what we were able to do with three guys, two cameras and a pirated version of Final Cut Pro.

Videos can be watched on our website, www.dubjones.tv/beans, just click on the van to begin and work your way west. Thanks for watching.

Please enjoy responsibly.