Question help please.

you can be either one, at different times
-- loners are on their own, even when in a crowd
-- being social means interacting with other people
~~~

Can you be both at the same time?

I think you can be lonely even when you're in a crowd. I don't think that's the same as being a loner though.

:) I'm a loner, but you are anti social.

I am strong willed, you are stubborn.

I am thrifty, you are cheap.

It is always in the first person the nicer word is used.... :)

Actually I think one is a loner until they make some kind a mess out of their lives, then they are labeled anti-social.

A loner could be someone who is shy actually, or avoids situations that make them uncomfortable. Anti-social behavior is more than that....the person goes a step further and could cause and do cause others harm.

A loner would be alone in their room and if you enter it, they may tell you they don't appreciate it.

Some one who is anti social would not only say that, they would probably throw things at you for entering their private domain.

Heather, thank you so much for clearing that up for me. I tend to be a loner a lot. I don't mind at all, I prefere it. But, when I am with people, I am very friendly. So, then I am not anti social, right? Just a private person?

I am both, depending upon the day.

How would you explain the difference Sidewinder?

The Veterans Administration certainly doesn't know the difference.
In high school I was a loner but still talked to people and interacted with them in small groups. I didn't follow trends or in the latest dumb in thing just to fit in. That is what is often referred to as a loner. Your friends are few but you generally keep to yourself.
My father and mother, they are anti-social. Every other word from their mouths are a threat or something negative which drives people away.
This is just an example though.

Aloner may not have any family or friends.
anti social doesn't want any.

I agree

Thank you Deloris and Marianne.

I can totally be an anti social person at times,specially when I dont know someone,but it dont mean Im not a social person...just hard for me to make new friends..I never know what to say lol.and always afraid what i might say wrong

Thank you angeleyez. I was confused about the difference, as I love to be alone. But, I am friendly when I am with people.

I agree with Deloris ,good definition .

Thanks Phil.

I have always seen the tag "loner" as an inaccurate, as well as an unfair, description of someone who has their own reasons for wanting to be by themselves.......

Good point, thanks Berf.

I think people commonly mix up the term antisocial with unsociable.

Merriam Webster defines antisocial as being hostile or harmful to organized society; especially : being or marked by behavior deviating sharply from the social norm

Antisocial behavior would be some of the following;

Behaves impulsively, thoughtlessly jeopardizing the safety of himself and others.
Is manipulative, lies or cons his way through situations.
Will not follow rules, enjoys breaking the law.
Borrows money without repaying it.
Steals.
Is overly aggressive, often picking fights.
Is willing to hurt others emotionally or physically without remorse.
Is arrogant and overly confident.
Likes to set fires.
Is cruel to animals.

Being unsocialable is defined in Merriam Webster as having or showing a disinclination for social activity : solitary, reserved.

I consider myself to be a loner as I really don't care to go out and socialize much. But don't worry, I am not antisocial and I won't burn your house down. lol

Wow, that is an awesome explaination, and has helped me alot. Thank you so much lera.
I am a loner, but friendly when I am with people, and never do anything hostile.

I understand. I once had a relationship with a man who called me antisocial because I didn't like to go out very much or care to be around people. Needless to say that relationship didn't last. lol

Anti-socal is not really liking, or having bad behavior toword other people, a loner likes to be alone.

Thank you Diane for your input and help.

In my opinion anti-social is not liking the society, the mass of humanity or just the crowds and their opinions, way of life, the requirement of complying with rules of society. A loner is a person who enjoys solitude or forced into it.

Thanks Gul, I guess I am just a loner. I like to be alone most of the time. But, when I am with people, I am very friendly and never do anything hostile.

I can feel alone, surrounded by many people. That I think has a lot to do with the situation. There are times I am alone and don't mind it, it gives me time to myself, but I prefer to have someone else around. Sometimes having other people around can be a lot of work depending who it is. Let's say if my mother in law was here I would feel I had to be right here for hours giving her attention. If it were a friend who was staying the day, one I see often, I wouldn't feel so hard pressed to "entertain" her...just be on call.

Someone times our life situation forces us to be loners, like if we have alcoholic parents or partners....the amount of closeness anyone can get can be defined by our circumstances as alcoholism so many times is hidden under the rug.

Many times we get hurt by others and don't want to make the investment to get hurt again.

I am a very open person, friendly and will give you the shirt off my back... but deep down inside trust is rarely given often. I trust few people. I love others very much, but I have been so burned, the trust part is so so difficult. I can't even tell you who I would want to be my medical surrogate if I were to need one. Medical surrogate takes great trust as they are to carry out your wishes and make decisions for you when you can't.

I don't think there is anything wrong with being a loner and I think anti social is a whole different ball of wax.

I do think there are very different reasons for being a loner and sometimes it is thrust upon us. If we lived near close family and friends, we would have more opportunities to interact and not be such of a loner. I know myself when I have been ill, as much as I can appreciate the attention, I shy away sometimes from the attention....I just need my rest.

You opened up a good conversation, but remember when we have the father, we are never alone.

I am a loner
I really enjoy being by myself and have no problem going days and days with no contact with anyone (before being a mom ; )
But I am not anti-social I think that these are people who really do not like being around people

hi...I am a loner only because that is what life gave me. I am out-going and funny. Everywhere I go ,eyes light up to see me.. I am a very good person ..always the life of the party. I find we are delt with the hand GOD gave us..I choose this life. I do enjoy my time alone..their are ups and downs, I can go anywhere that I choose without having to explain myself but I eat alone....so it is what you enjoy. I just found that as time passes that i was alone more and more until now....so I must get ready to be the life of the party...Thank you !