I’ve heard of old mossbacks, but can it grow on noses too? Something is happening to my nose. I thought it was some kind of skin condition, so I scrubbed it with Dial soap, I applied lotion, witch hazel, alcohol, Cuticura ointment, Bag Balm, and every external use only topical cure I found in my medicine cabinet. It got no better, so I scrubbed harder, making it bright red for a time. It afflicts about a half an inch of the end of my nose, and the area is actually turning light colored, and it feels rough to my finger. Could it be tiny little bristles growing there? What does that say about me if I develop a teenie weenie scrubbing brush on the end of my nose? White hair I can deal with – at least there is lots of it. Wrinkles go with old age and don’t bother me - much. But developing a scrubber on the end of my nose – uh-uh, I'd rather not, and I’d rather not think of what might be added to that idea.
I have decided it must be moss. I’ve been a tree-hugger all my life. I guess I should have stuck to hugging the south side of the trees. I also love rocks, especially great big ones. Moss on rocks comes in many colorful shades of green, red, yellow, and gray, but I don’t think I’ve seen any white moss. Maybe that is reserved for people and I should be glad of it. But if moss-growing can be caught from rocks, I would have it on my sitter, not my nose, wouldn’t I? I had not planned on anything like this happening to me. It is ruining my self-image, and that of a refined old lady that I would like to project to the world.
Life is already filled with so many problems: the high price of gas, inadequate health care, the deflated value of the dollar, foreign relations, foreign wars, climate change, and now this. I think I will go read a book.
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Comments: 8
Then I read it to my wife, and we both howled.
Is this what I have to look forward to?
I hate to think where moss might grow on an old man...
Bert - I'm glad I gave you both a laugh. I guess we take a different view of humor, because not many other people seem to have found it funny - or even read it. And it was about inexpensive health care, too! Right on the nose!
on the other hand, a nose job is ok. I have read that our noses keep growing as we age, ears also, I think. . . . . giggles. .
Yes, people's appendages do seem to keep growing with age. On me it's more ears than nose that grow. I have had to stop getting my hair cut at a salon, because I've discovered that beauticians can't hear old women like me. No matter how I tell them to cut my hair, when they have a go at it they start with the clippers and cut all the hair around my ears, being sure to outline them for everyone to see how big they are. Now I cut my own hair by feel sitting in an old metal lawn chair out in the back yard. It feels like a pretty good job - until I check it out with my hand mirror in the bathroom afterward. But heck, spikey hair is fashionable anyhow, isn't it?
Not all of them...