Australians have always made fun of the People across the ditch, Kiwis (New Zealanders)
Don't worry, they give us as good as they get, and one thing is we all laugh and none of it is said to denigrate each other.
Like.. How many Kiwis live in New Zealand? "About half" (The rest live in Australia)
We have all heard it, Kiwis shag sheep.
When we Australians ask a Kiwi about his wife, we ask "Hows Barrrrrbra"
Why do New Zealanders wear Gum Boots, (wellingtons) ? "So they can put the back legs of the Sheep in there to stop them getting away"
Well now there is a dating web site for Kiwis... and their love of sheep.
It is funny, and not offensive as I can see.
http://www.adultsheepfinder.com/
Couldn't help my self... one more.
An Ozzie was walking on the beach and came across a bottle, he removed the cork, and a Geni came out, The Geni said "you have 3 wishes, choose them wisely"
The Ozzie said, "I want you to sink NZ"
The Geni says "your wish is done" and he sinks NZ, killing all the Kiwis.
The Geni says what is your 2nd wish? The Ozzie says "in 4 days I want you to Raise NZ"
4 days time the Geni raises NZ, then asks, What is your 3rd and final wish? The Ozzie says, "In 10 days I want you to sink NZ again"
The Geni is puzzled and asks, "You sink it, then raise it and then sink it again.. Why?"
The Ozzie says, " I wanted to give them all enough time to get back there from Australia so I could get the lot of them"
New Zealand used to be a state of Australia in the 1901 constitution, but went on to become its own Country, But Kiwis still have employment and Government benefit rights when they come to Australia.
What Do Kiwis call "The Australian Unemployment benifit"? ... Income
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Comments: 2
Oz is a wonderful place alright. I was there training with the 2/4 RAR in Townsville for a couple of months and I got to hear all these and more. Every joke I'd ever heard about W. Virginia or Texas got turned into Kiwi jokes. One of my buddies there had a Kiwi wife and boy did the air turn blue when the two of them tied one on arguing about whse background was the most degenerate!
The worst thing was they would prowl on all the local girls with sweet talk, and get them pregnant, and then clear out back to NZ. And it is so funny that every Kiwi I ever employed or had something to do with, all stole something off me.
One stole every piece of furniture I ever had when I left her in to house sit while I went on Holidays.