SLASHING, CUTTING, BLOOD, AND TEARS—aka Editing Wombats CCCXXII

Hello.

Had to be brief so I could get in first ya know.

Lolol! Whatever works.

I may be scarce for a bit. My best friend lost her mom this morning, a week before she was to come over for the winter from Germany. I was very close to her mom too. I can't imagine not seeing her this year.

Oh, man, Sia, this is awful. Second death I've heard about today. Makes me wonder who the 3rd one is.

So sorry for your friend. Condolences to everyone.

So sorry, Sia. Sending hugs.

What Pat said.

{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}

Sorry to hear that, Sia. Take care.

Sia, a surprise passing is always difficult to accept. I'm sure you'll be there for your friend. My condolences.

My deepest sympathies to you and your friend, Sia.

Judi, you too.

Sia, so sorry to hear about this. My thoughts are with you and your friend.

So sorry to hear that Sia. My best thoughts to you and your friend.

I'm sorry, Sia. Sending peace your way.

So, over on the last thread, Judi talked about her lunch. The one she ate at 10:30 A.M. So do I have breakfast food now or lunch? Or just break open the popcorn, which is what I usually eat at this time of day?

I'm not slashing yet, on this WIP. I was worried that I wasn't going to have enough words to actually fill it up. (Which would be so out of character for me.) Then I made a list of the scenes I still hadn't written. Whoa. I'm gonna go over 100,000 if I'm not careful. And then I'll have to slash and burn plenty. But if I'm cautious with these last scenes, maybe I can write tight on the first draft and then not have to worry about cutting too much.

To answer the question: What I do first is print out a draft of the first draft. All along I've left blank lines and comments to myself, so now it's time to wrap those up/fill them in. I print it out, and start reading for all elements of the scene: does it progress the story? what is the purpose? is the reader grounded in the scene? does the dialogue work? does the logic/story work? are we getting enough of the attraction/adventure/motivation/conflict/goal?

I have a sheet that I fill out after I read a scene so that I can track what happens in each scene so I can go back and add something if I find a note later on in the ms (to find it easily). My headers on this chart are:

POV, Chapter, Scene, Pages, What Happens

Obviously the last one is the biggest column. It's a BIG help when I get to chapter 33 and realize I needed to add an element much earlier in the story - I read through the chart and figure which scene it'd work best in, find the pages then go to them. I can also highlight on the chart where the romance progresses, i.e. First Meet, First "notice" each other, first kiss, subsequent kisses/physical contact, etc. The POV column allows me to make sure I'm giving each character enough of an arc through the story.

and now, back to it.

Question from last thread: Can anyone offer a topic for me to blog about for my Casablanca Author's blog tomorrow? I've got another on on the 25th and then ANOTHER on Nov 1, launch day for WBU. And I still have 2 more to write for my blog tour and I'm having a tough time coming up with topics.

Anyone? Bueller?

Judi is WAY more organized for me. I have something similar, but am not disciplined enough to keep up with it.

I will say this. It's nice to get to an editing pass that doesn't involve basic grammar, punctuation, etc. I'm getting to "bigger" issues--action/reaction/resolution sequences, resolving bad writing habits (if I ever again use "thought", "and", "stopped", "paused", or "continued", kill me). I'm getting a clearer grip on my voice/style (I love deep POV, I suck at dialogue, and I tend to be a stage director, wanting to point out every time someone sits, stands, or crosses a room. I'm shocked I haven't written potty breaks into the thing. No, wait. First chapter, a character is returning from "nature's call". Never mind.)

What is editing?

Snork!

I'm organized like Judi. Spreadsheet and all.

First thing: put it away for a few weeks. Get away from it.

Next: dig out Snyder's "Save the Cat" and/or Vogler's "The Writer's Journey" and lay them next to the MS to get an idea of whether plot bits are in the best place. Then look over notes from McKee's "Story" and get to the details of scene structure.

Then toss out the "ly"s, saidisms, blah blah blah.

The first draft's for you. Get it out of your system, grammar and form be damned. Subsequent drafts are for your readers.

"The first draft's for you. Get it out of your system, grammar and form be damned. Subsequent drafts are for your readers."

Good point on that Rand.

I reread removed from the personal body of the work itself~ trying to see it as my general audience would see it~ and I go from there~ =)

Just to let all our ghoulish wombats know, it's here.........

Phantasmagoria

Perfect title for the announcement Sia, "Slashing...cutting, blood and tears". Thanks. I'm a editing newbie or denialist as I like to call it. So I got no great tips, Judi's sound awesome though. I'm taking that down as the new primer.

I was thinking of you when I titled it and added the picture (which I didn't have time to load the first time).

You are sweetest personified. *kisses

Jeez, I've never done a spreadsheet for a novel IN MY LIFE. And I don't plan on starting. I keep everything neatly organized in the ol' gray matter. Yes, all 43 WIPs and novels, or however many I've started/written at this point, are in there competing for attention.

What's the first thing I do to a first draft? Add 10,000 words to fill in gaps. It never fails.

Editing? Not me. I just finished the slash and burn on my fourth novel, which means NO MORE EDITING!!!!! At least until I finish my WIP, and at the rate I'm going, it could be years before I have to edit again.

I haven't had a chance to look at those 3 paragraphs you wrote the other day. You did write them didn't you??? And sent them to me??? hmmmm

Wanda, they're not typed up yet. The typing wasn't part of the deal! Once I get most of my blog tour articles written, I'm going to need you to cajole another three paragraphs out of me!

Ok, ok. I'll wait. Oh yes, I had a great time solving the puzzles and reading the first chapter of DAI. Fun party!

Sia, I'm so sorry about your friend's mother. Big hugs

Pat, your mother sounds like one of my grandmothers. She was such a hoot. What do you mean I'm supposed to wear mascara every time I go out? Hmm, eyeliner is enough isn't it?

Rand, my ribs are mad at you. They hurt from coughing. Your romp into DB-land wasn't nice. Laughing hurts dammit!

Judi, what Mer adventures have been left unexplored? WBU offers up visions of the mountain ranges, strange creatures and different climates under the sea.

On to the question. The first pass, for me, is about word choice, pov problems and flow. Once I've cleaned it up, so to speak, I send it off to some loving person who has volunteered as a beta reader.

I'm not overly wordy. At times I'm too sparse, so the dropping words normally isn't an issue. Finding the over use of phrases, words, connectors seems to be my focus lately. This is where a beta reader is an enormous help.

Being a beta reader is fun. Jamie, hint, hint. Cutting someone else's words? It's damned near as painful as cutting my own. This is someone's baby. What is their vision? Does this move the story forward or is it just fun? Are the questions I ask myself.

I have a doctors appointment tomorrow. For now I'm going to curl up in the lazy boy and try to find something to watch on TV. Over one hundred channels, why is it so hard to find something of interest to watch?

I put some 'hicken soup on the bunsen burner in the lab for you. I cleaned all the used fetal pigs from storage today, so I have plenty of "meat" in there. I hope you don't mind the slight chemical taste.

And I'm determined to finish Sed's Pariah this weekend. Though I'll need to do a first edit before it's fit for human consumption. (much unlike my 'hicken soup...)

Yum. And she says she has no ideas for Phantasmagoria.

Hmmm, have many dinner partys? heh

Judi, very organized approach. I'd played around with charting my first novel, but not in this depth.

For me, editing is both low level and high level. On my first MS, I went through several edit passes, mainly because I'd learned more about what I should be doing. The obvious things are getting rid of extraneous word choices, removing excess "he said, she said," and so on. Later, I looked at sentences and did re-writes on ones where the phrasing felt clumsy. I've also tried to remove passive voice sentences and minimize the "was" sentences in favor of more active verbs. Then there's the higher level issues, such as "does this scene work", "is there an important unexplained plot element or motivation" and so on. And yes, like Wendy, letting a Beta reader scan the ms with a fresh set of is very helpful.

For the next novel, I expect this process to be much more streamlined, since I've started with cleaner material.

And now, heading back home.

Thanks all. Mome, as we all called her, was here every winter for the past 7 years.

In the winter, we'd get together and do Glühwein and have marathon card games. I'd spend the weekend at those times. We did a lot of 'family' oriented things through out the winter and and several cookouts and whatnot up until mome left the end of May/beginning June. She tried, unsuccessfully, to teach me to make socks--sorry, no good at it. Mine tended to look like the person had one big foot and one small foot.

She'll be dearly missed.

Sia, I'm so sorry for this loss for both you and your friend. Big hugs.

I meant to say that Rand should drink lots of coffee often. Too funny over on the last thread, Rand.

Some of you are soooooo organized in your writing tasks. My hat's off to each of you.

I agree. Rand was hysterical. Extremely diverting.

So far, I have been doing it chapter by chapter, with GMC firmly in front of me. I already know I still have waaaay too many ly words. Yah, newbie me when I wrote it and lots of adverbs, lol!

I'm slowly coming around to the thought of spread sheets. Mine don't need to be deeply detailed, but I had someone go over one with me and the whys and how it made things easier overall (she's a real smart cookie, the down side is her deep love for spread sheets, lol). Of course the setting it up takes a bit...

I feel anyone's pain on cutting out words and even scenes. I had to cut about 7 chapters to just get to where the story began on one. I just put all those chapters in a dump files. Throw them away? Delete them? pfft, not on your life.

I should emphasize that my "spread sheet" is hand-written and done only AFTER the story is written. So I don't have to plot anything out, I just get to see if it flows.

Wendy thanks for the suggestion, but I actually DON'T want to answer that one b/c the answer is books 4 and 5 if I get to write them. LOL.

Just got over a big hurdle in the ms. One I was dreading. Phew! Should be some smooth sailing (or magic carpet flying?) from here on out.

back to it.

I start over.

Actually I try to read the MS from beginning to end and see how it holds up. THEN I start over.

I find someone who has a dog I can walk.

Lacking that, I find a pool.

After all, everything's better with water and dogs, especially those doubts I always have about being able to write.

Yeah, dogs may have chasing-their-tail neuroses, but did you ever hear one complain about writer's block?

(Oh -- and usually I rewrite and edit as I'm writing. Then I rewrite again.)

I'll lend you one of my Danes, Laurie.

Cool. I love Danes.

Judi, I wasn't speaking of books four and five... what happenings in WBU haven't been covered in blogs for the other books?

Jamie, the hicken soup sounds heavenly, cough, wheeze, it does, but I'll have to pass for now. The chemical odor, even inferred, made my tummy queazy. Nap time.

*Ta Da!!!

Just found out Wild Blue Under started shipping two days ago. I should have my author copies soon.

*smiling

Cool.

Love the picture with this article. So apropo. I got nuttin'.

Just saw the picture. We actually have that. A Halloween costume one year. Somewhere in the basement. Why am I scared to go get it? LOL

Yay! Laurie followed us here! We tend to lose a lot of new folks when we do the "everybody shift" thing. OK, Laurie passed the first test! Next test is a wombat contest and I see Vivian has posted the rules (Laurie, it's an annual thing Vivian hosts. You just missed the annual Dan Brown parody contest!

Wanda, I saw your message on the last thread about posting pictures of Mother's new eyebrows. Give me a few minutes to get some coffee and I'll put them up for you. They're actually kind of cool. Tiny "brushstroke" tattoos. But I need coffee first. The editing demons finally lost their grip and I went down for a three hour nap. You know what this means. Look for meandering, hyper messages from me around 4 AM.

I'm ready for a wombat contest, but clueless on where to find the rules.

Signed up for NaNo. Does that make me an official writing geek? And do I have to go to the write-ins? Sounds a little masochistic to me ...

Never mind. Found the rules.

Yes, signing up for Nano makes you an official writing geek. Also insane. Welcome to the club. What's your ID there. I'll add you to my friend connections. I'm shinythings, same as here. And I never go to write ins. From the forums, I can already tell that most of my local region writes sci-fi, and are under 22, neither of which is sounds fun.

I am creasy there as here. Would appreciate the connection.

I'll look for you too Laurie. I'm aries18 on Nano. Yep, youre a writing geek now.

Laurie, if you click on your buddies page you should see me. Click on me, and then my buddies page, and you've find most everyone else.

Thanks, Pat!

The leaves are beginning to turn color and fall.

Best part about this is I don't have to rake them up.

"Oh, Condo Life is the life for me!"

Wait, wait. Let me check the garage. Shovel. Ladder. Car. Hammer. Screwdriver.

Nope, no rake.

"Oh, Condo Life is the life for me!"

any units for sale nearby? I'm so ready to turn this big house, big yard in for something no maintenance. I already have the floorplan sketched out for our next house - the retirement one in the Poconos. All 1 level and tons of conveniences. Not to rush my kids out, or my life away, but I'm looking forward to it. :)

We planned for years. The economy killed the dream for a while, but we were lucky enough to sell our big house this summer and buy something smaller. I still get up each morning and think I'm on vacation.

Wanda, I posted some before/after photos of the eyebrow thing. You can also get tattooed eyeliner, but that's not for me. I like to change the colors too often. And lash extensions are cool, but they grow out.

Judi, I've been keeping a notebook of floorplans for years. I'm taking most my ideas from houses built to be handicap accessible/friendly. With my grand ideas, it's a good thing I have a vacant acre. And I plan to have a xeriscape/rock garden yard. No critters, raking, or mowing. LOL!

OK, ok, I blew off lots of editing today. Soup is on the stove (potato/ham/cheese), laundry is in process, and I've run out of excuses. Later.

One of my friends considered getting eyeliner tattooed on. Then she found out that sometimes you develop allergies to the tattoos YEARS later ... and then what do they do? Cut off your eyelid? (Speaking of Phantasmagoria ...)

Laurie's got her story idea! :)

Oooh! Oooh! And her lidless eye can become psychic and glow in the dark whenever a murderer is nearby ....

Hmm. This whole dark fiction thing happened to one of my friends when she was about the age I am now. I wasn't planning on this ...

Laurie, Rand is soon to be pubbed in horror and Jill's phantasmagoria entry from last year is now pubbed in an anthology. A number of us wander on the dark side. Jamie's nickname is Bonesaw, if that tells you anything. And the romances I tinker with could prolly be called "dark". LOL!

I want to eat at Pat's house.

Damn, I'm still trying to come up with something for Phantasmagoria. I somehow think I won't be allowed to gracefully sit on the side lines and just vote.

No, Sia, no more sitting on the sidelines. Once you've been blooded (and you have), you're one of us. MWAHAHAHA!

*frantically looking for a bandaide to hide the blood...

You can run but you can't hide..... the blood will always out! mmwwwaaahhhh.

Wisdom - does the Lady of the Lake's lake have a name? I'm drawing a blank and so is Google.

Judi -- found this on Wikipedia:

Different writers and copyists give her name variously as Nimue, Viviane, Elaine, Niniane, Nivian, Nyneve, Nimueh and other variations.

The name of the lake is "The". Duh...

Lady of The Lake.

:-P

It's always better to be a smart ass, than a dumb ass, I say.

LOL

Where the hell was the SPEW ALERT, Ms. Chapman????

It does seem to be a mystery, Judi.

Wikipedia: Different writers and copyists give her name variously as Nimue, Viviane, Elaine, Niniane, Nivian, Nyneve, Nimueh and other variations. [1]

Yikes on the chopping off eyelids. Phantasmorgia worthy, indeed.

Laurie copies and pastes faster than I :-)

Laurie has tons of copy/paste practice. She's a web editor (for 16 more days).

From Wikipedia:

"A number of locations in Great Britain are traditionally associated with the Lady of the Lake's abode. They include Dozmary Pool, Llyn Llydaw, Llyn Ogwen, The Loe, Pomparles Bridge, Loch Arthur, and Aleines. In France, she is associated with the forest of Brocéliande."

So I'm thinking about the Lady of the Lake now, and wondering what your complexion looks like after centuries in water loaded with leaf mold, dented soda cans, cigarette butts, used condoms, and that stupid sparkly confetti stuff my cousin puts in all my birthday cards.

Do you start to grow fungus like old trees? How long do your fingernails get? What do you wear underwater that doesn't rot after a few decades? Or how do you get out to buy new clothes?

Hmmm ....

Geez. You'd think Laurie was an original Wombat the way her mind works!

I'm thinking her mind works like Jamie's, which could be dangerous.

I'm thinking she'd have such a nice moist complexion, no dry spots.... beautiful....

... and more wrinkled than a century-old prune.

Well, I'm glad you're all having as tough a time finding the name of the lake as I was. I thought I'd heard a name at one point, but for the life of me (and my ms) I can't remember it.

Sigh. Will have to come up with a different reference...

So I forgot to write one love scene. It's at the end of my page count for the day, and frankly, I just don't have it in me (which doesn't bode well for poor Hubs tonight...) And no crude comments about the above line, please. This thread is not flagged.

Anyhoo, I decided to do a trade. One more chapter of tomorrow's page count tonight, then write the love scene in the morning. Sound like a fair trade? Then it's off to finishing this puppy up so a pair of Wombatti will get it over the weekend to get their chance at "Bloody Judi"-ing it.

So there was a Tennyson poem called "The Lady of Shalott." Could that be it?

Damn, this group is addictive.

*she cracks the whip

Back to resumes!

*CRACK!

Laurie, you've entered that Wombat Zone. Life will never be the same, but it will be amusing. You will also get more writing done than you ever imagined. Good luck with the job hunting thing.

The Lady of Shalott was a different character in the Arthurian legend.

Calling it a night. The contacts have completely dried out and I've gone beyond my page count for the day. Tomorrow should be it. Then incorporating hard copy edits on Friday into the electronic copy. Please pray the house doesn't burn down before I do that. That would so suck.

Night 'bats. I did my blog post - I'm sure you'll see the inspiration when it airs after 3 am est. www.CasablancaAuthors.blogspot.com

Sweet dreams!

Soooooo, I'm having a mostly one-sided conversation with the teen about his future college plans. I talk and he nods with a spacey look on his face. He can basically go to college for free at the college I teach at, but since he wants to go to pharmacy school (he thinks) they won't accept science credits from a community college - most of the pharmacy pre-reqs are obviously science (lots of chemistry). So he's going to have to do at least two years at a 4-year university before applying to pharmacy school in Omaha to get proper transfer credit (I looked at non-residential rates in other states and no can do - $30,000 a year for 4 years? uh... no... resident rates at Omaha about $12,000 a year. still high, but better). So, I'm researching scholarship programs at UNK and have discovered with his current class rank (upper 15%, this with a 3.965 GPA in the honors program, is that bunk or what? that used to be a top 5% type of GPA) anyway.... he needs a 31 on the ACT to get full scholarship if he keeps his current class rank. Erm.... We better get studying. LOL!

31 on the ACT!? Okay, sure. He is good at standardized tests. But a 31? *hyperventilates

Why do you care? You don't, but I thought I'd share anyway. And if you find me in fetal position in a corner, drooling and muttering FAFSA under my breath, you know why.

I suppose I should go get on the treadmill. I feel the need to sweat out a pound or so after examining the college "profile". Yikes!

Poor kid. He's been a teacher's kid for so long, he doesn't even realize that I'm a pain in the arse. But I know how to get him where he wants to go, so I guess that's a benefit. Right? Yeah. I also know how it feels to pay for student loans FOREVER, and I don't want that for him.

Hmm, I know a couple of students dad taught went to CCC before going to UNMC. Both are now doctors so didn't seem to hurt them any.

He can take his lower level electives there (english, speech, etc.), but they don't transfer science credits except gen chem and physics. They won't take organic, biochemistry, quant analysis, or anat/phys. So he has to take them somewhere. If he can get scholarships, he'd be better off going to UNK as a freshman and transferring into the PharmD program after two years. If not, well, we don't want to go there just yet...

And several of my students tried to get into the pharm program after going to CCC. They had to retake most of their classes and basically wasted a year of schooling.

Yes, I do know something about this. Surprising as you may find that.

Breath, Jamie. In through the nose, out through the mouth..one, two, three. repeat.

Must have changed then. I asked the one girl if all her credits transferred and they did.

I always thought Nimue was the Lady in the Lake, but that's apparently only in one tradition. Judi, check out the Wiki entry.

I got in some writing before heading to Yoga. And yes, it was a love scene. But only half. So I've got to finish that tonight. And eat dinner. Or can I just eat chocolate doughnuts? Maybe soup and cornbread. And then doughnuts.

Pat, I laughed about your mom and her eyebrows. Even cooler is that she emails at her age.

My mother learned out to email for no other reason than that she is a busybody. It drove her nuts that my sisters and I might be talking behind her back and she wasn't in on the conversation. It also drives her nuts that we're on Facebook and she's not, but we've convinced her the boogie man lurks there, waiting to pounce on old ladies. We long ago set up PC Anywhere on her machine, so we can log in from here and fix things for her, since she never, ever learned to follow the detailed instructions we've written up for her at least 10 times. It also pays to remember that the women in this family tend to be pioneering, fearless, and insatiably curious.

Judi, Rachael with her medieval literature could probably give you the most comprehensive answer. But the problem is multiple tales entwined. I provide the following from The Medieval Academy of America's journal, Speculum:

THE account of Merlin's disappearance from the world most often repeated is that he was imprisoned by the woman he loved after having taught her all the magic art that she desired to know. All the major versions in medieval literature, except the Vulgate Merlin Sequel, identify the woman in question as the Lady of the Lake,1 and all but the Prophecies de Merlin provide another name as well, written with several spellings that seem to be scribal variations of each other.2 It has become convenient to call the Lady of the Lake "Niniane" as she appears in the Vulgate Lancelot and the Suite du Merlin, "Viviane" in the Vulgate Sequel, and "Nymue" in Sir Thomas Malory's Le Morte Darthur.3 As the object of Merlin's fatal love the Lady of the Lake has achieved notoriety, but it is necessary to remind readers that she is by no means generally represented in medieval fiction as evil and that her place in Arthurian legend is not confined to being the cause of Merlin's disappear- ance. Malory's Nymue especially does not fit the label "wiley temptress" inevitably applied to Merlin's lover, and even more than her counterparts is worth being recognized in the fullness of the roles given her.

Additionally:
In the seven separate incidents using the name "Nymue," six also use the epithet, "damosel(s) of the lake," "Lady(ies) of the lake," or "chief lady of the lake." The phrases "one of" the damosels or ladies of the lake and also "chief lady" imply that there is someone in Le Morte Darthur besides Nymue known as "the Lady of the Lake," as indeed there is. This Lady of the Lake is the woman whom Arthur sees "goyng vpon the lake" (Bk. 1, ch. 25) where her sword Excalibur is held aloft by an emerging arm clothed in white samite. She gives Arthur Excalibur in exchange for his promise to fulfill a future request. A little later, in the tale of Balin, she comes to court to demand that Arthur keep his promise by decapitating either Balin or a certain damosel whose sword Balin has taken. Arthur rejects her request as unseemly, "I maye not graunte neyther of her hedes with my worship" (Bk. 2, ch. 3),

REgarding location:
Malory alone gives her the name "Lady of the Lake" and then takes pains to disassociate her from Nymue, perhaps as much because of Balin's accusation of falsity as because she has become a moribund character. It is easy to see why Malory, with his penchant for naming all characters, would have named the giver of Excalibur as he did. Although it is not her arm that thrusts Excalibur aloft here in a lake near Caerleon or that arises from a "water" to retrieve Excalibur later after the battle on Salisbury Plain, her dwelling place is apparently under or near the lake, for "within that lake is a roche / and theryn is as fayr a place as ony on erthe and rychely besene" (Bk. 1, ch. 25), and when Arthur sees her she is, of course, "goyng vpon the lake." Further, if Malory were already aware of the Dame du Lac as a personage in the French romances, it must have seemed appropriate to him to give her title to the source of Excalibur, Arthur's sign and implement of greatness...

I'm impressed Viv. I had always heard Niniane and Nimue.

You can be impressed with JSTOR and my wisdom to refer to it. But like most epic literature there are variations and errors in subsequent copying.

So does this mean Vivian is REALLY Judi's Lady of the Lake?

No. I'm just a watery tart, not one that gives out swords denoting monarchical powers. Though one of my nicknames which has long been lost to Wombat lore was Vivisection.

There are references to the Lady being a water nymph. The various names given her can be roughly translated to "being of the water". So perhaps there never was a specific lake she lived in, but instead she could show up in and around any convenient body of water.

Okay, I have enough things in my huge pond as it is. I dont need a nymph in it. Besides, I don't think it would classify "as fayr a place as ony on erthe and rychely besene"

Thank god for that, lol!

I think she's out there right now.

Why don't you grab a flashlight and check it out.

Uh, I think I'll pass, tyvm. It's raining. It's cold. The last thing I need is some nymph complaining about accommodations in a country pond. Granted, it looks the size of a small lake, a few stately Oaks gracefully ringing the pond and a rather thinned out oak grove for worship, but still....

Rand, stop making me laugh!

Sia, methinks she'd be everso grateful for a tyme spent in yon pond.

HELP!!!!!!! All the reviews I got for the ABNA contest are now posted on the Amazon page for Daughter Am I. So many of them such as the ones by Pat S. and Lisa F., said the work needed polishing, and it did -- they were good reviews for that version -- but the book has been polished and repolished ad infinitum. Also, points were taken off for Amazon's formatting problems -- I truly do know to put spaces between scenes. Would you do me a favor and read the first chapter and if you think it's better, will you revise your review? You don't have to change the star rating if you don't want.

Here is another lesson for those of you who did ABNA, (actually it's the same lesson) -- Change your title! On the other hand, most of the reviews were favorable, so I'm not really griping, it's just that they are reviews for a different book.

Truly bizarre -- still no cover photo, still no blurb, not a single copy sold, but 20 customer reviews.

Here's the link: Daughter Am I on Amazon

I just went ahead and deleted mine, since it doesn't really refer to this version. I'll add another one after I've read this version. I owe a dozen people reviews. Maybe this winter. After GH and Nano and Christmas. Sigh.

Thanks, Pat.

I owe reviews, too. Maybe we should have a Wombat review writing month -- WoReWriMo.

Okay, I deleted mine too! I probably should browse back and copy it though -- it was a positive review overall, so I could use part of it again.

Dana and Dale C, if you read this, will you change or delete your reviews? One talks about formatting problems, and there are no formatting problems in the book, and the other talks about needing one more line editing, which I did.

Thank you, Lisa.

I'm in the same boat, owing reviews. Perhaps January could be WoReWriMo. What say ye all, Wisdom?

I think I'm done for the night. I'm still cutting out "and" from the MS. I did manage to get into the 94K word range, and I still have over a hundred pages to check for the pernicious "and". Then back to the top again to hunt down "stopped", "paused", and "continue" (apparently I write as if I have some sort of remote control in my hand). Then a final run through just for GPs.

But not tonight. I'm cross-eyed. I think it's time for a caramel macchiato martini. Lovely dessert drink.

I just had a lovely caramel pecan roll all warm and gooey.

Hmmm, martini? I must have the recipe for that one.

Vanilla vodka, kahlua, cream, blend with ice, drizzle caramel on the inside of the glass and pour the liquor over it. Optionally add Godiva white chocolate liquere, but I never have it in the house. Also, I use a dollop of caramel rather than a drizzle. LOL!

94K?? Go you!

Caramel? I just spent an hour on the treadmill. How quickly would caramel undo that feat of will power? Pretty darn quick.

Jamie, I admire your goals and will power. But life is too short not to indulge in the sweet side of it now and again.

But it was that over-indulgence that made all this treadmill hell a necessity. What I find sweet now is dropping 6 sizes since July. :-)

You're such an inspiration!

I'm so proud of you! I hope you are cleaning out those larger sizes and gifting them on someone who needs them. Go, Jamie!

I am already got into the liquor cabnet, first. After I finish a novel, I have already outlined the next, or am well into the next novel. Writing's something I do, always, either thinking about the subject at hand, or writing/editing/musing about the next or last. I've plenty of novels. my best year was six novels in one year, read and weep, Jamie.

The most words I ever deleted form a Novel, (Young Adult) was twenty thousand words. To this day, the Novel remains the same. Catchy Title, eh?

Sia's got scary ladies in her pond. And now that Rand's fed them, they're gonna want to hang around. I hear they love warm pecan rolls.

Time to turn in. See y'all tomorrow.

Hope the scary ladies aren't anything like goonies!

*snork. Yep, we be writers, lol!

Turning in. The brain is wide awake but the eyes can't take it anymore. I've deleted over 14,000 words from the MS and still have a ways to go. Some of those were really, really good words, too. But I've kept obsequious, supercilious, and unctious (all describing Winston, who drives me bat-shit crazy), and basso profundo. I have also memorized the thesaurus when it comes to ways to say "fire". Good night, my dears.