by JOHN BECK

Member since:
August 27, 2008

Mishe-Mokwa~Dramatic Monologue for Mindful Poetry

October 03, 2009 07:46 PM EDT

views: 150 | 1 person recommends this | comments: 78

OK. I didn't record it. Maybe someday. Anyway, here's my first attempt:

I am spirit Mishe-Mokwa

Once a noble, peaceful black bear

Thriving on Great Spirit’s bounty

Sockeye salmon, ants, blueberries

Shared the forests, shared the rivers

Shared the shoreline with all creatures

Lured by tantalizing odors

Entered into National Park land

Tasty trash was found appealing

To my cubs and furry cousins

Lived in harmony with humans.

Then one day my cubs were threatened

Senseless tourists stalked and touched them.

I, protecting cubs from danger

Touched audacious perpetrator

Felling him with well-placed paw swipe

Never shall he touch another.

Cubs were safe but wound was fatal.

Fate was sealed. For my death sentence

Was required by law of humans.

I am spirit Mishe-Mokwa

Comprehending not the justice

Once a noble, peaceful black bear

Now an executed slayer.

Tags: mindful poetry, dramatic monologue, poetry

To Groups: Thepoetscircle, Mindful Poetry

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Alison H.

Comments: 78

JustMe ~I'm happy to be~ Oct 3, 2009, 7:47pm EDT

Definitely needs to be recorded - spoken out loud.

It is in the great spirit of Native American chants.

JOHN BECK Oct 3, 2009, 8:00pm EDT

I like trochaic tetrameter for this type of piece, JM. I borrowed her name from Song of Hiawatha.

JOHN BECK Oct 3, 2009, 8:01pm EDT

Thank you for your comment.

JustMe ~I'm happy to be~ Oct 3, 2009, 8:03pm EDT

It is a lovely piece.

JOHN BECK Oct 3, 2009, 8:08pm EDT

Thank you, JM.

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Barbara H. Oct 3, 2009, 8:17pm EDT

I was thinking Hiawatha as I chanted this tale to myself. Beautifully lilting and heart touching just thinking of how many great black bears became spirits just for protecting their cubs.

JOHN BECK Oct 3, 2009, 8:22pm EDT

Thank you, Barbara.

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Marilyn is looking for whatever there is. N. Oct 3, 2009, 9:55pm EDT

Yes, me too, Hiawatha, but then I started wondering if you'll record it and also if it was actually some family history. I'm glad it's not as I'm part Pequot, the last name was not Sock-eye salmon, but Fish!

JOHN BECK Oct 3, 2009, 10:03pm EDT

Susan wants us to record these and post the recordings or video clips but I'm not set up to do that. Thanks, Marilyn.

JOHN BECK Oct 3, 2009, 10:07pm EDT

So you live close to your roots? The Pequot were in the area which is now Connecticut.

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Jennifer Lee Oct 3, 2009, 10:13pm EDT

I'd love to hear a recording, but the poem is perfect the way it is. I've been watching movies all day and am thinking about writing on wolves. I feel a bit inspired now. Featured in The Poet's Circle.

JOHN BECK Oct 4, 2009, 6:33am EDT

Thank you for the comment and feature, Jennifer. I'm glad it stimulated you.

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Karen E. Oct 4, 2009, 12:25am EDT

So well expressed John. It brings a very needed message.

JOHN BECK Oct 4, 2009, 6:34am EDT

Thank you, Karen. We've seen people do some very foolish things with bears in our national parks.

Karen E. Oct 4, 2009, 11:16am EDT

They do the same here John and not even in the parks. Rural folk leave out food for the "wild" animals" thus encouraging them to interact with a population that can poorly understand their nature.

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Guy W. Oct 4, 2009, 2:19am EDT

I was about to ask if you chose the Hiawatha rhythm on purpose, and then I read your comment.

This was a news story. And a sad one. A nesting hawk in South St., Paul, too. Started nailing people who got too close to the nest, and, instead of calling the Raptor Center, the ssppd got trigger happy.

Susan Budig Oct 4, 2009, 4:02am EDT

I thought that killing a hawk was illegal. There was someone in my neighborhood a couple years ago who shot or might have tried to shoot a hawk and the federal government came knocking on all of our doors to find out what we knew of the crime.

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Susan Budig Oct 4, 2009, 4:03am EDT

John is your poem pure fiction or is there a story in the news to which your refer?

JOHN BECK Oct 4, 2009, 6:37am EDT

This is not from one specific news story. However, it's not "pure" fiction in that in the past bears have been pestered and if one kills a human, it is not relocated. It is put to death. I chose the black bear because brown bears are more likely to attack humans unprovoked.

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David W. Oct 4, 2009, 11:19am EDT

It is a sad documentary of mn and his interaction wiht the wild. Nicely penned.

JOHN BECK Oct 4, 2009, 12:07pm EDT

Thank you, David.

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Kushal Poddar Oct 4, 2009, 12:20pm EDT

The meter, the subject and I must stress that the spirit are wonderful.
Good work and the message is touching, piercing without being emotional.

JOHN BECK Oct 4, 2009, 5:42pm EDT

Thank you kindly, Kushal.

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Alison H. Oct 4, 2009, 1:02pm EDT

An all-too-common scenario, well told.

JOHN BECK Oct 4, 2009, 5:42pm EDT

Thanks, Alison.

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Kathryn E. Oct 4, 2009, 8:48pm EDT

Absolutely stunning, JOHN.

JOHN BECK Oct 4, 2009, 9:37pm EDT

Thank you sincerely, Kathryn.

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Bhawana 'Gather Proud Mom' Oct 5, 2009, 2:18am EDT

you penned it with the tender hands.Very impressive work, John! I am also eager to hear it.

JOHN BECK Oct 5, 2009, 7:04am EDT

Thank you, Buzz.

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Ruthi C. Oct 5, 2009, 4:14pm EDT

Because these were to be written and recorded, I chose not to participate, tho I'm sure glad you wrote your anyway John! This is a wonderfully written accounting of life and death.

JOHN BECK Oct 5, 2009, 10:17pm EDT

Come on in, Ruthi. The water's fine!

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Dr. Ashok Saxena Oct 5, 2009, 6:40pm EDT

Ur a great experimentalist and succeed in any form yhat u touch upon , I liked ur monolog.

JOHN BECK Oct 5, 2009, 10:18pm EDT

Thank you kindly, Dr. Saxena.

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Magi the magical poet is riding the wind again Oct 6, 2009, 5:39pm EDT

This poem contains a message too often overlooked - well done, John.

JOHN BECK Oct 6, 2009, 10:19pm EDT

Thank you, Magi.

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Liz [site-Raven] Please critique my poetry. Oct 6, 2009, 9:39pm EDT

I like the cadence. Yes, this is very much a song. And although the ending is painful ... a painful truth, there are places of great wisdom and humor here.

JOHN BECK Oct 6, 2009, 10:20pm EDT

Thank you, Liz. This was a response to the Mindful Poetry form of the month, which is a dramatic monologue.

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Marge H. Oct 7, 2009, 10:15am EDT

I don't know what I can say that hasn't already been said here. A well written poem with a heart breaking message.

I loved reading it from the bear's perspective.

JOHN BECK Oct 7, 2009, 10:53am EDT

Thank you for your visit and comment, Marge.

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Susan B. Oct 8, 2009, 3:13pm EDT

Nicely done John. It's sad that we write laws for inhabitants who have no representation. They didn't get to sign off on the agreement whereby man takes it all.

JOHN BECK Oct 8, 2009, 3:38pm EDT

Thank you, Susan.

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Sue Lee Oct 8, 2009, 4:30pm EDT

an interesting way of spiritualizing a natural dilemma. I volunteer for an animal rescue and have seen horrific things perpetrated by human animals! Enjoyed this very much!

JOHN BECK Oct 8, 2009, 6:40pm EDT

Thank you for your visit and comment, Sue Lee. Do you volunteer with a specific breed rescue or a multiple type of pet rescue?

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Sue Lee Oct 8, 2009, 7:38pm EDT

The rescue seems to primarily focus on "throw-aways", pits rescued from fights, starved dogs and cats and those ready to be euthanized at shelters. I just gave up a beagle/basset that I had been fostering so it could be adopted. I had it 6 months and socialized it, got it's weight up and started house training as well as "four on the floor" and fetch and release. I love it!

JOHN BECK Oct 8, 2009, 7:57pm EDT

Wonderful! I applaud you and what you do, Sue Lee!

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William Dotani Oct 9, 2009, 1:06am EDT

The pathos in your tale is gentle yet sad. I very much like how you let the story unfold at a relaxing pace.

JOHN BECK Oct 9, 2009, 7:08am EDT

Thanks, Bill.

William Dotani Oct 14, 2009, 11:43am EDT

Looking at the facts, Justice took not such into consideration.

JOHN BECK Oct 14, 2009, 10:13pm EDT

I agree.

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elizabeth e. Oct 9, 2009, 7:21am EDT

So many times I have seen this scene played out...in Alaska as well as at Yellowstone. If humans were only wise and learned that we are the guests in the forest.

JOHN BECK Oct 9, 2009, 7:32am EDT

Yes, and it only takes a few thoughtless individuals to cause great harm. Thank you, Elizabeth.

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Barbara B. Oct 11, 2009, 6:43pm EDT

This was by far the best piece I've read that you've penned
my dear friend. Mishe-Mokwa certainly was a great choice to
be the star of this 'Dramatic Monologue' John. The Bear is my
Totem. Brown Bear !! Thank you.
Hugs n Love, Barbie

JOHN BECK Oct 11, 2009, 11:58pm EDT

I'm honored that you approve, Barbie. Thank you.

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Barbara B. Oct 11, 2009, 6:44pm EDT

I'm posting another story on 'Outside the Reservation' today John.
Please do me the honor and read this story, thank you.
Hugs n Love, Barbie

JOHN BECK Oct 11, 2009, 11:58pm EDT

I always enjoy reading your stories.

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Quinn (aka Entwife) Blackburn Oct 12, 2009, 9:35pm EDT

wonderful wordcrafting! Thank you for feeding me with your marvelous poetry

:) wishing you laughter

JOHN BECK Oct 12, 2009, 11:04pm EDT

Thank you, Quinn.

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Curt L. Oct 13, 2009, 12:38pm EDT

Wonderfully written, truly touching!
Thank you!

JOHN BECK Oct 13, 2009, 2:12pm EDT

And thank you for your visit and comment, Curt.

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Debra H. Oct 14, 2009, 7:54am EDT

This is just wonderful John

JOHN BECK Oct 14, 2009, 8:05am EDT

Thank you, Debra.

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C.F. Stewart Oct 14, 2009, 9:48pm EDT

I still love it, John! The personification of this poor animal is simply marvelous! In this write, you have given all animals a voice and it speaks of a dominion not owned by man as he believes, but by nature, something man has tried to tame. May he never do so. Tragic and so well written. Superb, my friend.

JOHN BECK Oct 15, 2009, 12:22am EDT

Thank you kindly, Chris. I share your concerns.

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Sheila Deeth Oct 14, 2009, 11:44pm EDT

May not be recorded but I hear it in my head. Beautiful.

JOHN BECK Oct 15, 2009, 12:21am EDT

I truly appreciate your kind comment, Sheila.

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Kathryn E. Oct 16, 2009, 7:16am EDT

Had to re-read it. Beautiful, your best work.

JOHN BECK Oct 16, 2009, 7:29am EDT

Thank you again, Kathryn.

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Barbary Chaapel Oct 17, 2009, 5:30pm EDT

Bear spoken history... I think this be excellent as a teaching tool.

You open our imagination and heart with this, John.

JOHN BECK Oct 17, 2009, 6:43pm EDT

Thank you, Barbary

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Elsie Duggan Oct 20, 2009, 12:22am EDT

John, you are a master poet in my mind, you can tell any kind of story, this did remind me a bit of Hiawatha and I love that poem still, there is a bit of American Indian in my ancestor
gene pool, and writing this from the bears outlook is wonderful, great writing John,

JOHN BECK Oct 20, 2009, 6:37am EDT

Much appreciated, Elsie. Thank you for your generous comment.

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Laura M. Oct 24, 2009, 8:36am EDT

Powerful fare that touches me deeply. Capturing the
strength and courage and necessitated instinctual
and emotional response to human ignorance/naivete.....
resulting in an enormous tradgedy of Spirit. I read recently of
a hunter taking aim and shooting a bear that a group of wildlife
hikers were watching by a stream. He simply got out of his truck
and shot from the road to the shock and disgust of all...it literally
made me ill.