OLYMPICS RACIST!!

COPENHAGEN (SR) - Democrats are accusing the International Olympic Committee (IOC) of racism after the home town of the first mostly-black President was rejected to host the 2016 Olympics.

Citing the strong likelihood that Olympic athletes and spectators would be robbed/raped/beaten/murdered, Friday the committee elected to pass on Chicago.

The IOC statement outlining their decision said in part: "With the exception of abundant cheap crack and whores, we can find absolutely no redeeming qualities for the city of Chicago, and those things are not enough to offset the inevitable bloodbath of gang violence an international Olympic event would surely suffer there."

Reacting to the news, an emotionally distraught House Speaker Nancy Pelosi told reporters, "The IOC did everything but don white sheets, rape the First Lady, and string her and the President up next to a huge flaming cross. It makes me sick to my stomach."

Former President Jimmy Carter called the snub "racism at its ugliest," and accused the IOC of secretly conspiring with Israeli government agents controlled by GOP strategists in the United States. "The filthy Jews are working with GOP Klan members to do whatever they can to make our mostly-black president look like a jackass," said Carter.

On a side note, there are reports that Obama confidant and supporter, Oprah Winfrey, who is with the President and First Lady in Copenhagen, choked on a chicken bone upon hearing the news. A White House source says that the entertainer accidentally "inhaled a drumstick" and was transported to a local hospital on a flatbed truck with Michelle Obama at her side. We are waiting for word on her condition.

My comments: Good God, is there no place on this earth where white racists aren't conspiring to make President Obama look like a retarded pinhead?

Won't you join me for some delicious margaritas and a prayer for Oprah's complete recovery?