by Heather - child of God, C.
Member since:
May 8, 2007

When Do You Disconnect?

September 26, 2009 03:59 PM UTC (Updated: September 26, 2009 04:06 PM UTC)
views: 0 | comments: 25

Do you disconnect from someone if they don't agree with you?  Can you stay connections or friends when you don't see eye to eye on the issues?

If someone pisses off someone who is a friend or in your click, do you go the way of the herd?  I know I must have irritated someone  as  a whole click of people have dropped from commenting on my articles awhile ago before the points reward system changed. I still would make the comment I made as I feel that person was wrong for doing what they did. If a whole group disagrees with me so be it.  You can't please all the people all the time.

I often appreciated comments from people even if I don't agree with them as often they can give me a different view...or an understanding of why someone does not agree. There is a lot to learn from other people to understand why they think or feel the way they do. Agreeing or disagreeing should not be a basis for not being friends with someone.  Often I appreciate someones honesty. Many times in life people agree with you rather than not offend you.  To me if you are not attacking me, just what I said and my reasons, I may find you have a valid point.  I know I am not perfect and I do make mistakes or I may not be informed on something.

Many times I do not get in discussions on things as there are many things I don't understand, like in politics. I had made a comment during the election over something the democratic party did and got my head handed to me by some democrats.  They assumed I was a republican.  I've been a registered democrat since I began voting in 1972. I am however married to a registered republican...and trust me, over the years we have learned to agree to disagree on politics.

Some people disconnect if it looks like you haven't been on gather for awhile.  The thought is if the person comes back and they liked you, they will reconnect.

So what is your criteria for disconnecting?

Comments: 25

Nancy Paoletti Sep 26, 2009, 4:04pm UTC
Now that would be silly. I love my father and I disagree with him all the time...but I'm not going to disconnect from him.

Just because we may not see eye to eye on one or two points, doesn't mean we can't talk about other things.

I think that this country is in a bad way right now, and it's basically because if someone disagrees with on thing then they turn their back on that person no matter what else they might agree on.

I know I've had people disconnect from me because I may not agree with them on something. I have only disconnected from a couple of people and mostly because they routinely feed into the hate rather than having nice things to say about anything.
j - Frugal Mom - r. Sep 26, 2009, 4:04pm UTC
I don't disconnect because I don't agree with someone. However, there are certain rude behaviors that I do not tolerate, and that surely will make me disconnect. I guess it is all on an individual basis.
Teresa A. Sep 26, 2009, 4:11pm UTC
I have never disconnected from anyone. I don't care if people like what I say and think or not. The world would be pretty boring if we all thought exactly the same way on every issue. I love a good debate. What I don't like is when this place starts acting like kindergarten with all the name calling etc. I have no use for drama!
Peter Joseph Swanson Sep 26, 2009, 4:15pm UTC
I only disconnect if they email me yelling at me that I have to comment on their stuff.

I'm not organized enough for that.
Peter Joseph Swanson Sep 26, 2009, 4:16pm UTC
One time I missed ONE post from this lady and she emails me saying "Friends comment on other friends"

BOY was I outta there !!!!
Peter Joseph Swanson Sep 26, 2009, 4:17pm UTC
I even wrote an article about that, and she commented on it

ha ha ha aha ha
Katharyne T. Sep 26, 2009, 4:39pm UTC
friendship has its up and downs, your not going to agree on every subject, its good to have different views on things. I would stay away from someone that makes me stressed out, who has negetive engergy that wears on me.
Stacey Mamasaid Sep 26, 2009, 4:50pm UTC
I happily agree to disagree with anyone. If they get nasty, I tend to let their comments speak for themselves (peaceful resistance). In these rare situations, I found others disconnected from me. I felt sad we could not agree to disagree but I guess it happens sometimes. Meanwhile, I happily befriend any and all, relishing our differences and learning from them.
They disconnect from me first! Just like in high school, nobody has to hang with me if they don't won't to and I won't be upset if they leave...but remember, I'm the one with the fat allowance and the fake I.D.
Linda T. Sep 26, 2009, 5:39pm UTC
I have never disconnected from anyone. I know one person who disconnected from me because we disagreed about the changes that Gather made to the point system. I did not like her attitude and am not overly fond of people who brown nose but figured she was entitled to her opinion. I thought it was bit immature of her to disconnect but we did not really know each other anyway.
Amanda "middle of nowhere" C. Sep 26, 2009, 5:52pm UTC
I disconnected with someone who was rude, not just to me but from everyone. And I got tired of the constant mass mailings.
penni d. Sep 26, 2009, 5:58pm UTC
Filling up my mailbox with junk does cause me to disconnect, but I still read evryone I can, heather. I read random posts each time I come on. People who stay angry are not my cup of tea either, otherwise most all are welcome...:)
Candace * Sep 26, 2009, 6:28pm UTC
Great post, Heather. Gee, in a timely fashion, too. I have disconnected from 'friends' and I have had 'friends' disconnect from me. Mysteriously, a couple of times I have noticed myself disconnected from someone and when I asked "why?" I was told they didn't disconnect and it was happening to groups of people all at the same time. Gather system glitch?

I've tried to make amends and offered apologies with some of my "friends" (can relate to the part where 'you had your head handed to you' over politics - the 2008 season was rough) but to no avail and those special friends who handed me my head, well, thank you. I like my head. I managed to put it back on and it feels just fine.
Lune Wolfsong Sep 26, 2009, 6:32pm UTC
*nods* There is a gather glitch that does that. Articles about it often pop up right after upgrades.
DesertDarlene L. Sep 26, 2009, 6:48pm UTC
It just depends on the person and the situation. I tend to disconnect with people that I haven't known very long if they seem combative. I tend to keep people friends if I know them better even if I don't agree with them. If someone's just not posting things that I am interested in, I may disconnect with them if there's no other reason to keep them as a friend.
Deloris Wright Sep 26, 2009, 11:52pm UTC
I have never disconnected from any one. ut there is one guy who droped me as a friend. He is a liberal. So he didn't like some of my post's. I just had my head handed to me last week. But I am back and going strong this week
Heather M. Sep 27, 2009, 4:33am UTC
It isn't about disagreeing with someone. I have several connections that I disagree with on various issues. Some of my connections are even *gasp!* from that other political party.

Bigotry and hate mongering are the things that will definitely result in a disconnect. That is appalling coming from anyone--even more so when it comes from people who profess to be Christians.
robin r. Sep 27, 2009, 5:44am UTC
Heather and I agree to disagree. It works or us. Our paths are very different. What I enjoyed most about Heather is her giving nature. She loves her friends. It is such a wonderful quality. Gather is so perfect for Heather its as if she inspired it.
Lisa Frost Bailey Sep 27, 2009, 7:10pm UTC
If someone chooses to disconnect from me, so be it. I rarely DISCONNECT from anyone, though I have a group of people I never see or hear anything from that I have grouped in my friends list together. If the only things they post are of no interest to me, and my work doesn't interest them at all, I put them it the "other" catagory, and if I have time, I will look and see if anything has been posted from that group that i find interesting. I have disconnected from a few, but they were usually crude and vulgar. If somebody disappears, I check on them. If they never respond, I may eventually move them to the other group, but it just depends.
M M. Sep 28, 2009, 8:04pm UTC
All my friends are wonderful. I only am friends that are sweet, and respond to my posts, and I try to do the same. I used to have over 800, and removed everyone except for 50 now. We ping, and respose back and forth to friend posts first, and are always respectful and nice. I don't keep anyone else.
I don't think I have ever disconnected from amyone here, though I do know what you mean, I have had many do it to me....mostly because of my ¿ political views or maybe the excess of games I like yo post ?

se la ger.....
Marilyn M. Oct 2, 2009, 6:17am UTC
I think I've only disconnected with 2 people in 2+ years and it was because they were being cruel to others.

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