by Barbra L.
Member since:
September 30, 2006

"Come September"

September 17, 2009 06:25 PM EDT (Updated: September 26, 2009 02:15 PM EDT)
views: 64 | comments: 33



Come September,

Fall will usher in its splendor

~~~

On the heels of summer’s curtain call.



Thistledown, tall and slender,

Will bloom and offer sweet surrender

~~~

To life controlled by nature’s thrall.



Come September,

Goldenrods with flowers tender,

~~~

Will bask in sunlight’s glorious awe.



Forget-me-nots I’ll long remember,

For all these tokens of September,

~~~

Are welcome signs of Nature’s fall.

© Barbra L.





*******


Jan: The free-write below Susan's definition helped me weave the poem.

"To freewrite, you must write without stopping for a designated period of time. Don't think about the perfect word or to get your thoughts in order. Don't worry about punctuation or spelling. Just write."  - Susan Budig

*******

 5:54pm - it’s September…I welcome fall this fear, for it seems I’m fbcoming more fond of it yar and yaeerer. I collect the leaves evey le.. Year and keep them in bokks. They look so beautiful yet today. Some have faddaed a tad, but it odeesn;t matter, I remembner how precious they ae to me. My grandmother always loved ‘leaves’… perhaps that’s why I do as well. I miss her so. The beautiful color of the yellow golden rod glisten in the meadow meao.. as my dog, Minky, and I walk briskly by them. She pulls me fast … I have to run to keep u with her. She loves it so!!!! So do I. we have such fun together on our walks… running! - 5:59pm

 

*******



 







 
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Comments: 33

Granny Janny H. Sep 17, 2009, 6:48pm EDT
Gorgeous!
Barbra L. Sep 18, 2009, 9:23am EDT
Thank you very much, Jan!
Granny Janny H. Sep 17, 2009, 6:49pm EDT
Post it to Poet's Weekly Muse! I'll feature it.
Barbra L. Sep 18, 2009, 9:25am EDT
I'm very honored, Jan. I've sent it to the group. Thank you!
Granny Janny H. Sep 18, 2009, 5:49pm EDT
It didn't show up. But I did feature it in Friday Free Writes Featured!
Barbra L. Sep 18, 2009, 6:03pm EDT
Thank you, Jan. I'm glad you got my email about my inability to publish to groups that are moderated--such as your Poet's Weekly Muse group. I will let you know something as soon as I hear from Chuck. Hopefully, he can get the situation repaired as quickly as he repaired the other publishing problem I had. Thank you again for the offer to feature "Come September". I'm very honored!
Barbra L. Sep 18, 2009, 6:09pm EDT
Thank you, too, for having featured it in Friday Free Writes. How exciting to have my work featured in two of your groups!!
Karen A. Sep 17, 2009, 7:00pm EDT
Very nice!
Barbra L. Sep 18, 2009, 9:24am EDT
Karen: I appreciate that. Thank you.
Autumn Farrington Sep 17, 2009, 7:24pm EDT
Barbra: I love how you’ve turned your 5-minute free-write expressions into such beautiful poetry. This is such a poem of welcome gentleness and tenderness. Its rhyming pattern is lovely, and I adore the image of the forget-me-not flowers.

“She loves it so!!!! So do I. we have such fun together on our walks… running!” *Such a cute line from your free-write! Congratulations on having been featured by Jan at her Poet’s Weekly Muse!!!
Barbra L. Sep 18, 2009, 9:27am EDT
Autumn: Thank you! Lovely expressions you've shared.
d d. Sep 17, 2009, 8:18pm EDT
forget me nots, I'll long remember.... love that... great poem.
Barbra L. Sep 18, 2009, 9:29am EDT
d d.

Thank you for your visit and your sharing of thoughts. *I'm glad you liked that particular line.
Alison H. Sep 18, 2009, 4:11am EDT
Lovely! I remember pressing leaves in wax paper......
Barbra L. Sep 18, 2009, 9:32am EDT
Thank you, Alison! What a nice memory you've expressed...
Susan Budig Sep 18, 2009, 7:30am EDT
I very much like the meter of this poem. Plus, I like how it has a short line visually--Come September that's long in syllables.

Barbra, I wonder how this poem would look in a more traditional format? I think it would use negative space that Atticus talked about a couple weeks ago in his Saturday WE column.
Susan Budig Sep 18, 2009, 7:33am EDT
Also, if you added a couple lines to the end with a change of POV, you'd have a sonnet, a tribute to September. :-) Just saying....
Barbra L. Sep 18, 2009, 9:45am EDT
What a wonderful idea you've presented for a sonnet as a tribute to September; however, I have never written a sonnet. It is a form to which I have never been drawn because of its intimidation. I will have to work on that and overcome it. Thank you for your suggestion.
Barbra L. Sep 18, 2009, 9:41am EDT
Thank you, Susan. I’m glad you liked the meter and the short line with long syllables. I like those kinds of lines, too.

RE: Traditional formatting & Negative space

I think your idea of formatting this in a traditional form is lovely and how 'acutely' perceptive of you to link the poem’s content with negative space!
Ann M. (Site Scryer) Sep 18, 2009, 9:49am EDT
This is lovely and classic. It's fun to see the inspiring free-write as well. Your poem reminds me of one we learned in grade school:

September

A road like brown ribbon
A sky that is blue
A forest of green
With that sky peeping through.
Asters, deep purple,
A grasshopper's call,
Today it is summer,
Tomorrow is fall.
Barbra L. Sep 18, 2009, 10:12am EDT
Ann: What a beautiful poem from your grade school years, and how thoughtful of you to share it with us. I’m delighted mine served as a prompt to recall it for you. Thank you very much for your reflections.
Svetlana Goryacheva Sep 19, 2009, 4:49pm EDT
Absolutely wonderful, as always, sweet Barb... believe me or not, but just a few days before, walking along the Sparrow Hills, I noticed some dandelions in the green grass... I wouldn't be surprised if it was May, but dandelions in September... in Moscow!...

Love and hugs in a plenty - S.
Barbra L. Sep 19, 2009, 5:23pm EDT
Thank you, Sveta...

That is amazing! I wonder if would have something to do with the altitude of Sparrow Hills. Have you seen them there before at this time of year? Do you have what is called hawk’s beard or hawksbeard in Moscow? *It is a yellow flower that resembles the dandelion (from the genus - Crepis). There is also another type of flower that resembles the dandelion. I believe its name is catears. Thank you so much for letting me know this interesting rarity.

lynn a. Sep 22, 2009, 11:06am EDT
Now I am in awe. I love this poem and would like to memorize it. The appreciation of Nature, and the descriptions are so strongly alive that the poem seems to be a gift of new sight. At the moment I am reading a book of poetry. Can't recall the name, but it spotlights 100 of the most well-known poems in American Literature. I hope that someday this poem gets put in a book as an example of exquisite poetry.
Barbra L. Sep 22, 2009, 11:30am EDT
Could anything delight a "novice" writer, such as myself, any more than the compliment you've just given me? Oh, you thrill my soul, lynn! Filled my heart with an appreciation for which I cannot seem to find adequate enough expressions.

Thank you so very much!
Susan B. Sep 24, 2009, 7:24pm EDT
This is simply gorgeous!! It really flows :)
Barbra L. Sep 25, 2009, 9:32am EDT
Susan: So appreciate of your kind words. You’re such a talent! I always marvel at your ability to take on a new type of poetry form, toss the complexities to the wind and write a stellar example of the forms! It’s such fun to see the outcome of your creations--especially these Than-Bauks! What life you’ve given to them! You’re a jewel.
Barbary Chaapel Oct 23, 2009, 4:34pm EDT

Beautiful verse and thoughts for a chill, damp autumn day such as this one today.
That and a cup of tea from your icon..............
Barbra L. Oct 23, 2009, 8:01pm EDT
A cool autumn day and tea with Barbary... I can't think of a better way to spend the time.
Barbara H. Nov 28, 2009, 11:30am EST
Your beautiful tenderness peeks through a bouquet of forget-me-nots cornflower blue!
I don't think I'll ever see the seasons as beautifully described! Thank you!
Barbra L. Nov 28, 2009, 6:46pm EST
Barbara: Your compliments tap into a very fragile part of my soul, for the tenderness you discern is in regard to my grandmother whom I loved very much. Her tender spirit still lingers in my heart, and come the fall of each year, I remember her more profoundly than the year before. Grandmothers have a very "special" role in our lives.

I'm not surprised of your discernment, Barbara; afterall, that's what "godsends" do...

Barbara H. Nov 28, 2009, 10:53pm EST
In our family, I am the Gramma and I am so overflowing with the tender love of so many grandchildren (26) and great grandchildren (8) that I always have enough to share. Each child knows he/she is unique and treasured to me. (I think that is the special position a Gramma holds and if that isn't enough THEN we get paid with hugs and kisses and special adventures. I can see this is the position for which I was trained. (smile) And I understand your missing your Gram. I can't replace her but I can share what I have with you.
You are a sweety!












God does seem to send us what we need at the time and right now I appreciate

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