One More Reason for My Kid to Hate Me

I encourage my boys to go to sleep overs at their friends houses, they're also 18 & 23.

I can see where you're comming from, but sleepovers are ok if there's supervision and the kids aren't running the streets, but staying at the house

Since I have a 11 year old son, there is no sleep overs. Here or otherwise. I can remember how I acted at these things, and that is enough to make me say NO WAY!!!!

Oh no, look at the things I have to look forward to. I was just thinking about the Ouija board, that Light as a Feather game ( I used to play in the 70/80s) and there are so many other witchcraft games I am sure being played today. That scares the C* * * out of me.

I have two daughters and we had tons of sleepovers. That way I knew where my kids were.

My 12 yr. old daughter goes to sleepovers and has them. I know what the girls are doing....and actually we just had a Wizards of Waverly Place House Party...the girls had a great time. My neighbor Tracy and I knew exactly what these girls were doing the whole time.

Oh, man... lighten up! Let her sleep over at the houses of friends whose parents you know & trust. Things will be fine. And if they get into a little mischief... well, that's some of the fun of being a kid!

Sleepovers were a really fun part of my childhood.

I let my daughter go to her best girlfriend's house for sleepovers and the father of the friend molested both my daughter and his. He got a felony conviction for it.

Thats one of the horror stories I was talking about!
Host any future sleep overs at your place to keep a watchful eye on things.

My son when young had a few incidents where he slept at a friends house and a few where the friend slept at ours. With the exception of one family where the children were very close to me, they were disasters. Bullying, terrorizing and sexual harassment. Yes, I'd ban them if I had to do it over again.

I think they could be ok if you know the parents who are hosting the sleep over VERY well.
I've heard horror stories about girls getting molested at sleep overs.
But I went to many when I was a kid so I think if you just have an understanding with the parents and you call to check in every once in a while.
Or you could just host it at your house.
Sleep overs are kind of part of being a kid and I think it outcasts them and makes them miss out on the things their friends are doing to not be a part of it.
It also makes them excluded from the out of school activities.

Checking-in is an excellent idea. Also let your kid know if they feel uncomfortable to let you know or have a code phrase to pick them up no matter what the time or the reason.

Thats an awesome idea.. A code word or sentence that would be easy like "Did you feed my hampster mom?"

It sounds to me like these kids are not being supervised or watched over. I'd also say for 10 year olds they should have had a 'lights out" time that was known ahead of time.

Next time talk to the host parent ahead of time. Find out what structured activities will be happening. Ask about games and movies that might be shown. If you disapprove of anything be up front and say why she cannot go to the parent in charge. If you have not met the family and interacted with them on an ongoing basis keep your child home.

Rules need to exist at parties as well as any other time.

I think as a parent we HAVE to be picky about who and where our kids have these sleep overs, we need to know all the details of who will be there and some of the things they plan on doing but at the same time sleepovers are great for not only kids but it gives the parents a break too,trust is the key word you have to trust the people who are going to be watching her and you also have to trust your daughter that she will do the right thing

TPing a neighbor's house, crank-calling boys is ok ) but Ouija board , hell no.

So engaging in illegal vandalism and harassment is OK, but playing with a board game is not? You do know that "crank-calling" is actually illegal in a lot of states, right? It's considered a form of harassment.

Oh shut up, Lol let them have some fun you old witch.

You either missed my point or chose to ignore it. You have no problem with kids "having some fun" at other people's expense, but you said "HELL NO" to playing with a Ouija board, which is just a stupid board game. I'm curious why you make that differentiation. Though I suspect I already know the answer, but instead of putting words in your mouth I'd like clarification.

Kids get into mischief- that's part of being a kid. As long as the trouble isn't serious or dangerous, and as long as you know and are comfortable with the family and the rules that have been set I think it's all fine.
At 10 I remember playing truth or dare, light as a feather/stiff as a board, the ouija board, crank calling friends. I would say that TPing a neighbor's house would be alright if either they cleaned it up or the neighbor had a good sense of humor and understanding of pre-teens. We TPed our tennis coach's house in highschool but we cleaned up afterwards. His wife helped!

As for kids sleeping over at our house, I would be sure to ask the parents which activities they are alright with and which are big no-nos. What kind of movies their children are allowed to watch and what they can and cannot eat. It's important for both sides to be informed and to compromise to be sure that everyone is happy and safe. What is okay with one parent may not be fine with another parent and those boundaries need to be established beforehand.

I think at 10 - 13 I'd let them go, if I knew the other parents to be responsible, present at the time, and sleeping with one eye open.
Starting at 14, no daughter of mine is sleeping outside of my house until she moves out on her own.

When our daughters were 10 years old, sleepovers with known friends was not a problem for us. Adults need to realize that once puberty sets in, there is danger in those largely unsupervised gatherings. I put my foot down against overnights from age 13 to when they went to college. They hated me at the time. Now in their thirties, they have their own kids, and admit that I was right.

I have no problem with sleepovers, as long as I know the parents.

My little girl is 2 years old now. One day I will face this sleepovers too.
Thanks for sharing