News on James' adoption and a letter

Many of you know the story of James and if you don't you may read it at http://babyjamesfoundation.org As some of you know she has signed the adoption papers, however, we had the wrong paperwork.  The judge issued a Guardian Ad Litem for James who helped us get the correct paperwork.  She as well agreed James belongs in our home.  Soon after that she broke the order of protection and ended up in prison once again.  The order of protection ran out in February and they told us until closer to the date we couldn't get another one. 

We was as well trying to get the adoption done on our own by the time she was released.  However, today the Guardian Ad Litem spoke with the judge and he recommended we do it after she was released since they most likely won't bring her to the court date anyways.  After thinking about this I was first upset, then I thought okay not a problem.  She is released on August 26th so take a guess who will be sitting in court with us on August 27th?  You got it right we are sending the letter off tomorrow to notify her of the court date.  She has already been served with the adoption summons.  She has Bipolar and is Schizophrenic so we are hoping she still agrees and signs the paperwork.  If she does everything will be done on the day.  If not we have to fight to terminate her rights.  We have a attorney who has agreed to take the case.  It will cost of course but something I will do to save this baby against that nut. 

She has her chances to raise him, she has had her chances to have supervised visits.  She screwed all of them up including shaking him in front of a case worker through DCFS.  They wouldn't protect him I will, I have the report showing it happened.  I am asking all of you if you believe in prayers pray harder then you ever have till the 27th of August.  I am so ready for this to be over with and James needs it over with.  He has to go to court on that day.  The only grandparents he knows, the ones that stood by us through it all will be there as well.  I am hoping to have several pictures of a joyous moment on this day.

Now I have a letter I would like to write for myself mainly to his egg donor.  I am the one who has to write the letter to notify her of the court date and I really need to get all this out of my system.  This is going to be in a form of a photo essay so please bare with me.  Thank you all who has supported us through all of this.

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Laura,

You know all the things you have done to James, I don't need to tell you.  You know you could of killed this precious little boy.  Why? I don't know.  I don't know how a mother could do something like that to their own child.  Could it be because you aren't his mother?  You gave birth but are you really a mother? 

See from day one when you wouldn't get off your butt.  When you wouldn't wake up to feed him.  I did it, I came to your apartment, I held him, I rocked him, and I fed him.

When you wanted to abandon him in your apartment at 2 weeks old.  When you then dropped him off in my apartment.  I took him with arms wide open as my own.

When you was given another chance and in return you tried drowning your baby again I was there to catch him.

When he learned to crawl I was there.

When he learned to walk again I was there.

I am there to tuck him in to bed.

When he cries it I make it better.

That first birthday oh what a joy he brought us.

Then there are the Christmas'

and Thanksgivings'

That first hair cut.

Boy how do I love to clean up those messy faces.

and I love even more those kisses I get

and the hugs.  Hearing in return "I love you mommy" I ask him how much? He says "All the way up to the sky and all the way to the ground"

Mother's Day this year I will never forget.  He came running in yelling "Happy Mother's Day mommy" Giving me a big hug.

I teach him to put one foot in front of the other.

And no matter what he call his mommy for anything.

Do I feel sorry for you?  Not really to be honest.  You don't deserve this boy.  I know that if it wasn't for Eric, Judy, Nolan, and myself this boy wouldn't be here today.  I know if we didn't fight like we did you would of killed him.  See you are nuts like that and  we all know it.  You can fight all you want, but see I am more of a fighter.  I will fight till the day for my children.   Did you hear me?  My children I will fight for.  This boy is my child.  In the end I know one final thing you can't fix stupid. 

You however, can do what is right.  You can give this boy the life he deserves.  You can stop this fight or you can continue the fight.  I will make you one promise though, I will fight to keep this boy safe. 

He has a family now, he is with his daddy and mommy.  That doesn't include you.

Some say I am to rough on you.  They can say what they want.  This is nice compared to what I would like to do.  You never paid the price for what you did to this boy, you don't have these memories.  You even said you only wanted one thing and it wasn't James.  I am done, but you think about this and I will see you in August.

Sincerely,

James' Mommy