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January 4, 2007

My children are liars!

June 28, 2009 11:41 PM EDT

views: 278 | comments: 94

Originally I had thought I would be writing a post tonight about my grandson Jr's preschool graduation. Instead I find myself wanting to share with everyone the fact that my children are liars. I love my children but this week they were all placed high on my s**t list. Allow me to explain what actions led to their placement on the list.

Twenty years may not seem like a milestone anniversary for some but for me it is a miracle. I truly never believed my marriage would make it this far. Some of the issues we faced were difficult to overcome. These issues built walls that threatened to divide us forever. Never let it be said that stubbornness does not have its merits. Both my husband and I have strong stubborn streaks. Neither one of us will ever admit that we are competitive against each other but those who knows us will claim this is very true. I was not going to be the first one to give up on our marriage and my husband wasn't going to be the first one to cry uncle either. Life together may have been difficult but life apart was worse. We did briefly separate but quickly discovered that despite our disagreements we needed to be together. Apart we were not whole. Taking into consideration all our trials this anniversary was important to me.

Through hints and flat out statements I made sure our children understood this anniversary was important to me. I did not want presents or a party. I wanted my children to celebrate the day with their father and me. I did not think this was too much to expect. My children felt otherwise. Over a month prior to our anniversary date one of my daughters informed us that we had to attend my grandson's preschool graduation on June 28^th. My anniversary fell in the middle of the week on June 23^rd so plans to celebrate had to be the weekend before or the following one. The graduation ruled out the later date so I assumed we would all celebrate the weekend before. I made phone calls and found not one of my children was interested in celebrating. I was hurt but thought maybe during the week we would celebrate. This was not to happen. Everyone was busy doing other things. My children are all adults so they are capable of deciding for themselves what they want to celebrate. One child in particular was acting like the anniversary was nothing at all. Lauren and I are very close and her actions all week were really bothering me. I even tried explaining to her that I thought she would at least celebrate with us since she lives with us. Her reply "what kind of freak would want to celebrate their parent's anniversary with them"? I was so angry with her I refused to talk to her all week. My husband and I celebrated by ourselves on Tuesday. It was nice but we are very family oriented and thought it odd that not one of our children wanted to share in our festivities.

Jr's graduation from preschool was an important event and I vowed to put my feelings aside and help him enjoy his day. Brandie told us that the teachers wanted everyone to dress up a little. Nothing fancy but wear something nice so that the kids feel it is a special occasion. I bought into that idea and agreed with it. Still I dreaded attending this event because it was suppose to last five hours and being in a room full of five year olds does not always make for a pleasant experience. I tried to think of a way to get out of going. After being lectured by my daughter on how important this way I resigned myself to go. She told me she had volunteered the services of both Lauren and herself to help the teachers set up. They would go early and my husband and I would bring Jr. While we are getting ready I remarked that I thought it was strange that there had been no rehearsals and I complained that school was done two weeks ago so why did the school wait so long for the ceremony. Jr piped up and asked us where we were going. I had thought he would know about his own graduation but he claimed he was not graduating. Great not only do I have to attend a preschool graduation but the graduate does not want to attend. When we pulled up to the hall I noticed that there were not many cars around. I have been known to run late to events so my children do try to trick me and tell me something starts hours earlier than it actually does. This added more fuel to my fire. Now I am early to a graduation where the graduate has no clue he is graduating. Talk about wasting my day.

Have you ever felt like a complete jerk? Today was my day to feel that way. We walked into the hall to shouts of "surprise". I was speechless for gathered in the hall were my children, grandsons, siblings, parents and in-laws all present to help us celebrate our 20^th anniversary. After the initial shock wore off I glanced over to see Lauren beaming like crazy. The whole party was her idea. She rented the hall and arranged the entire event. I had just spent the week ignoring her and being angry while she was busy preparing for the party. The other children all helped her with setting up and making sure everything went smoothly. Michaela had snuck in my kitchen during the week and snatched my wedding topper so she could put it on the cake she made. I had thought she was swiping measuring cups or some other bake ware, a habit she has gotten into since moving into her own apartment. Everyone had brought food, the hall was decorated and they had even thought to bring music. My husband and I were encouraged to reenact our first dance and the cake cutting. They had wanted to play our wedding song for us but neither Mike nor I were cooperative with the questions that were asked regarding the song. Typical we both thought it was a different song. We are competitive even in our forgetfulness. My children knew my heart after all. What a wonderful way to celebrate a milestone!