Passion's Path

 "Van, where are you?"

            The calling echoed from the top of the hill where my boarding school was located. The sound such as the waterfall freely slid down the hill and threaded its way through hundreds of big trees. Sitting comfortably on a stairway of rocks that led to the rock cave where the statue of Our Lady of Peace placed in there.  I did not hear the calling because I was completely absorbed with the story I was reading. Everyday, around six o'clock in the afternoon, the sisters began searching for me. They had to call my name aloud to locate me swiftly. They could not predict where I would head to everyday to find a quiet, peaceful place to hide and read my book.

            When I was six years old, my parents were busy with the family business; therefore, they sent my younger sister and I to a private Catholic boarding school. Imagine a six-year-old girl forced to live far away from her home without her parents.  I always felt sad, lonely, and I became quieter everyday. I tried to isolate myself from people around me, except for a few sisters and my favorite teacher. I did not want to make friends with my classmates. I just wanted to be isolated in my lonely world. To fulfill the lonesome days in the boarding school, I made friends with books at a very early age.

            Everyday, after I finished my homework, I used to go somewhere quiet and hide there to read my books. Because I lived in a Catholic boarding school, all books were strictly prohibited except for the religious books.  Thus, most of the books I read were religious stories such as the interesting stories from the Old Testament, the New Testament, and the lives of saints. Because I read everyday, I read fast and I read a lot. The books in the boarding school's bookcase were not enough for me. I had an older friend who was a seminary student and he would soon become a priest. I called him "Brother Ha." Every week, Brother Ha sent a package full of books from Saigon City to my boarding school to fulfill my reading demand.

            Deeply absorbed in the religious stories and the spiritual environment around me, I become more religious. Although I was born in a Buddhist family, at the age of seven I asked my parents to let me get baptized and become a Catholic. In addition to becoming a Catholic, I wanted to express some more of my faith. At the age of eight, I decided to be a nun when I grew up. However, how could I predict what I would be when I grew up?

            "Van, where are you?"

            The calling fluttered through hundreds of fruit trees and drifted above the endless rice field. Usually, the call was unlikely to reach where I was hiding and most of the time it faded out before arriving at the destination. Everyday, the workers at the orchard had a difficult time looking for me throughout the orchard. They combed the orchard and called out my name. How could I hear the calling while mesmerized with the characters in the book I was reading?

            When I was eleven years old, our family moved from a big city to an orchard in a rural area.  Our six-acre orchard was located in a beautiful place. There was an evergreen mountain in front of the orchard, and a thick forest lined at the back of it. The orchard had twenty-seven different kinds of tropical fruit, and there were hundreds of trees. When the most beautiful time arrived, the flowers from the fruit trees and the wild flowers were blooming and they attracted the bees, the birds, and the butterflies. The scenery naturally was painting a picture perfect. 

            Obviously, I could not resist the beautiful natural environment around me.  Everyday, I had the responsibility of supervising a small group of orchard workers, but my parents rarely met me at the workplace and they were nervous and concerned where I would be hiding. Ignoring my responsibility, I usually climbed up a tree; then I chose a big branch, rested on there, and read a book. After I was done reading the book, I enjoyed closing my eyes and listening to the sounds of nature such as the wind flowing through the leaves, the squirrels chatting, and the birds singing nearby. Sometimes, I opened my eyes and watched the sunshine dance on the leaves. 

            After 1975, the boarding school forcefully closed when the communists from the North took over South Vietnam. My sister and I went home and lived with my parents at the orchard. How could I describe the happy feeling of being home with my parents after almost six years being lonely in the boarding school? Unfortunately, I was too young too realize being home with my parents simultaneously meant I would never have the chance to go back to school again. Because of the political conflict, my family was an anti-communist party. For that reason, I stopped going to school when I was eleven years old and I just finished fifth grade.

I was a good student when I went to school. Since a little girl, my studies have interested me profoundly. That was really hurtful and painful for me not go to school again. Therefore, reading at this point of time was not to fulfill my loneliness. I read many books to educate myself and I learned that the quest for knowledge had only intensified. I never gave up and I never liked the fact that I was an uneducated person. I read so many books from my parents' bookcase and did not leave out a single book. There were novels, history books, psychology books, philosophy books, Buddhist's bible, and even the dictionaries...etc. Everyday I was reading every single word in the books to fulfill my eagerness for learning. Fortunately, I have learned a lot from those books. At this time, I knew I was not able to be a nun. Consequently, I always wondered what would I be when I grow up.

            "Van, where are you?"

            The calling was whispering through dozens of bookcases. My co-worker's voice was so soft such as breath of air flew among the bookcase's shelves. I replied to her under my breath because I did not want to disturb the patrons who were reading the books or doing their homework.

            Time rapidly flies away; the little girl nowadays becomes a mature woman. As a wife and a mother of two young boys, reading as always still is my favorite activity. Reading at the present time is not for the lonely days. I am still reading for learning. Reading is deeply immersed in my brain, my heart, and my soul.  I have a habit to read every day and during every spare minute. The words are so attractive to me. I cannot resist looking at the words when I see them. Every day, besides reading the books, magazines, or Internet articles, I also read every single word that appears in front of my eyes in my daily life. These words are from the magazine covers while I am checking out at the supermarket, the advertisement on the bus' side while I am driving, or the flyers around the campus while I am walking into the school library or from class to class.

            The love of reading eventually led me to choose a career I love: a librarian. I enjoy working with books and being surround by the books. Through my passion for reading, I know that I will enjoy working as a librarian. I feel that if I can enjoy my career, I will be able to do a better job for my employer and feel satisfied with my work. I strongly believe reading is the most powerful tool to obtain knowledge. As a librarian, I will have the opportunity to help and encourage many people to read, and I will be able to help the patrons whenever they need to look for the library materials.

To achieve my goal and become a librarian, I need to first attain an A.A. degree from Gavilan Community College. My next destination after the A.A is to transfer to a four-year university and pursue a B.A degree in English and a M.A degree in library and information science. Never once in my life did I imagine that I would be able to go to college. It sounds unimaginable, especially for me, a mother of two boys and with my fifth grade education background. Some may think my goal is unreachable. However, I believe: no dream, no success.

            The calling at the boarding school and the calling at my parents' orchard faded out along with time. However, the calling from my passion for reading is still stronger and louder everyday. The path of my reading passion leads me through all the time from a little girl to a mature woman, from the lonely days to the insatiable hunger for knowledge. The reading passion's path has led me to the answer for my question "What will I be when I grow up?" Certainly, I want to become a librarian. Can I make it? Can I make it all the way through? I believe I can accomplish my goals because I am a strong individual that never gives up when an obstacle presents itself to me.