Saying Goodbye..

On Valentine's Day in 2000, the kids and I adopted a cat named Baby.
This was 2 months after my husband left. Baby was 12 years old at the time.

With the sadness, anger, etc.. that a separation of that type brings..
We so needed this lovable little angel in our lives..

Baby was the only cat that I've ever known that actually hugged you. Unconditional love was the gift that he gave us and what he surely received.
He was my little cuddler.. If you were sick... Baby was right there.. Most of the time laying right on top of you.

All he ever really demanded was Catnip. I think he may have had an addiction.. But, we won't go in to that here. =)

Last night, I had to do what I never thought I could do...
I had to put him to sleep.
For the last month or so Baby was struggling to walk.. His hind legs weren't as nimble as they once were.
Over the last few days.. Baby lost the use of his front paws. He just laid on the couch and didn't move much at all. Then he stopped wanting to eat or drink water.

It was so hard to say goodbye. Even harder because he still responded when I said.. " Hey, Handsome" and when I said his name.
But, his eyes told the story of how he was ready to go.

At the Vet's office he didn't seem afraid like I thought he would be.
I just kept petting him and when I leaned in close he pushed his face against mine, like he always did... all the while he was purring up a storm.

The Vet said that Baby had a tumor that was pressing against his spine. He was too old for surgery and the paralysis and symptoms would get worse and eventually cause him a lot more pain.

I couldn't do that to my old friend.
As they inserted the anesthesia.. I kept talking to him and petting him.. He layed there and didn't take his eyes off of me. Then he was gone.

My heart is broken..

People who don't have pets probably wouldn't understand..
And that's ok.. Perhaps one day they'll be fortunate enough to have one touch their lives..

Rest in Peace.. Handsome.