Selective readings for the supremely intelligent

Bumper sticker creations:

I watch the Daily Show, and I vote!

Unattended children will be given an espresso and kitten.

I am not an alcoholic I am a drunk.  Alcoholics go to meetngs.

My Chihuahua is smarter than your honor student.

Dont bother me. I am living happily ever after.

My pit bull can eat you honor student.

A Freaudin slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.

I tried being normal. It was just too boring.

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

I'm retired. I was tired yesterday and I'm tired today.

Everything I need to know I learned in prison.

(IN Texas) HI YA'LL

I am having an out of money experience.

Save the planet. It is the only one with chocolate.

Ladies, keep you husband interested. Wear leather. You will smell like a new truck.

 A penis for your thoughts. 

And:

Have a nice recession.  (;-)