Becky's Heart (revised)

Comments: 33

Granny Janny H. Mar 20, 2009, 12:17am EDT

I read it a few times and feel the deepness under those ripples of memories in the sunset as well as the love shared between the narrator and the child who grieves.
It's a very moving poem, Atticus.

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Ron (in complete sheeple overload) W. Mar 20, 2009, 12:35am EDT

Thanks Atticus,
We support those we really love, unconditionally, I think. This is a lovely expression of that event.

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amanda wallin Mar 20, 2009, 1:56am EDT

The poem reads like a funeral procession where your empathy places you. Brilliantly penned, you capture the heartache of your love.

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Adrian Eve Revenaugh Mar 20, 2009, 4:45am EDT

Atticus,
This spirals tightly around again, and again, reverantly for the ones we care for and for our caring. I liked it.

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JustMe ~I'm happy to be~ Mar 20, 2009, 5:45am EDT

Exquisite. I do believe that empathy gives us a window into someone else's soul.

Like Atticus Finch (my all time favorite character......smile) said, You never really understand someone until you walk around in their shoes for a while.

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Svetlana Goryacheva Mar 20, 2009, 6:02am EDT

Liked it immensely... I can only echo JustMe's words. :-)

Blessings and good luck - S.

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JOHN BECK Mar 20, 2009, 7:15am EDT

There's something more every time I read it. So much meaning and emotion in such a short piece. Lovely.

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Kushal Poddar Mar 20, 2009, 9:24am EDT

This is a poem with so many images and all in a roller-coster.

An Evening Love

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Atticus *. Mar 20, 2009, 9:48am EDT

Thank you all so very much. This is an older poem I dusted off the other day and decided to give a re-write to. It is a poem very near and dear to me and one of the first poems I wrote for my wife. We had been to vist my mother early in our relationship. We had such a good time that day that it triggered a deep sense of loss in Becky for her mother whom she had lost a few years previously to Lung Cancer. On the way home we had the most brilliant sundown sky on our left as we drove through a light shower. Becky opened up to me about her mother and cried for her loss and the fact that I would not know her. I just held her hand. I fell so much deeper in love with her that day, and I believe she with me.

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JOHN BECK Mar 20, 2009, 11:06am EDT

Being sensitive to her loss fosters a deep loving connection. The last sentence in your above comment is so perceptive.

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Granny Janny H. Mar 20, 2009, 9:42pm EDT

That's what came across to me so vividly in poetry, Atticus. More more more, please.

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Carolion Grailbear Mar 21, 2009, 12:13am EDT

And all through the reading of it, the sound of rain! I think perhaps you might be one of those poets who also affects the outer weather as the inner is understood.

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Stirling D. Mar 21, 2009, 12:48am EDT

The rhythm of this poem felt like a penny dropped and twirling to lie quiescent at last with your final line. Or it might be a thumbprint gently inked into paper. Reading this I got an impression of reading between the lines.

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Atticus *. Mar 21, 2009, 5:15pm EDT

John, Jan, devaa, Thank you all for your very kind comments and encouragement.

Carolion, I love your comment: don't we all? ;-)

Stirling, Thank you so much for that. Reading between the lines is always what I'm after. I absolutely love your descriptive take on this poem.

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Jennifer Lee Mar 21, 2009, 6:32pm EDT

Atticus, you are the only poet who has ever moved me to tears so easily. To be able to reach into your readers' hearts/souls and help them to recall their own memories is a gift too few poets possess. The beauty and ache in this poem is exquisite. After reading your reply to your friends, I began to tear a bit because my dad has lung cancer. Thank you for sharing your innate ability to touch lives with your works of art. I'm thrilled to have you in my group! Hugs, Jennifer

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Atticus *. Mar 21, 2009, 6:48pm EDT

Jennifer, I am overwhelmed by your kindness. My sincerest wishes for your Dad's recovery. This must be a very difficult time for you. Your words of encouragement for my work mean so very much.

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Jennifer Lee Mar 21, 2009, 8:27pm EDT

Thank you for posting to our group. Namaste.

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Kathryn E. Mar 21, 2009, 8:38pm EDT

Bittersweet at its best - both the bitter and the healing sweetness.

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Atticus *. Mar 21, 2009, 8:45pm EDT

Thank you so much Kathryn.

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John F Walter Mar 22, 2009, 5:23am EDT

Exquisite in capturing this moment of grief that binds these two people together; these tears feel real, not maudlin and forced, and the way they bring speaker and the interlocutor of his direct address is eloquently delivered. Beautifully done, Atticus.

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Ann M. (Site Scryer) Mar 22, 2009, 10:04am EDT

You accept your loved one's tears with all the calm and wisdom of a buddha.

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Atticus *. Mar 22, 2009, 10:08am EDT

John Thank you for your praise of my poem. You know how much I admire your skill. Your comment means a lot.

Thank you so much Ann, you are kind beyond words.

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Mary H. Mar 22, 2009, 10:45pm EDT

This is a wonderful read. It's very emotional. Points Nation

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Atticus *. Mar 22, 2009, 11:02pm EDT

Thank you Mary.- And thanks for connecting.

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Sue T. Mar 27, 2009, 7:08am EDT

Your words are exquisite and deeply moving.

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Purrrrrrrrrrr~Genki dashite~Nantoka naru-yo! S. Mar 27, 2009, 1:32pm EDT

To witness the grief of a beloved is heartbreaking, to permit her the grief, to become a part of her as she grieves is pure love. Your poem touches deeply.

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