by
Matt O.
Member since:
March 18, 2007
Joke: Skinny Dippers- Think Fast
March 17, 2009 12:46 PM EDT
(Updated: March 17, 2009 12:57 PM EDT)
views: 48
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comments: 3
An elderly man in Florida had owned a large farm for years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some
orange and peach trees. The pond was ideal for swimming, although he rarely did that anymore.
One evening he decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five gallon bucket with which to bring back some fruit.
As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.
One of the women shouted to him, 'We're not coming out until you leave!'
The old man frowned, 'I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or to make you get out of the pond naked.'
Holding the bucket up he said, 'I'm here to feed the alligator.'
Moral: Old men can still think fast.
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Comments: 3
Young Chuck, moved to Texas and bought a donkey from a farmer for $100.
The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day. The next day he drove up and said, "Sorry son, but I have some bad news. The donkey died."
Chuck replied, "Well, then just give me my money back."
The farmer said, "Can't do that. I went and spent it already."
Chuck said, "Ok, then, just bring me the dead donkey."
The farmer asked, "What ya gonna do with him?"
Chuck said, "I'm going to raffle him off."
The farmer said, "You can't raffle off a dead donkey!"
Chuck said, "Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead."
A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked, "What happened with that dead donkey?"
Chuck said, "I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars a piece and made a profit of $898.00."
The farmer said, "Didn't anyone complain?"
Chuck said, "Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back."
Chuck now works for Morgan Stanley in their OTC Default Derivative Department.