The Mother of All Cooking Contests Part 3 (Contestants: Partial List)

Part three for all you purists who insist on counting in order. Actually, if I may be so random, one, two, four, five, three sounds like Jazz to me, so I rewrote without a memory of what comes next.

Well, I guess something should be said about a few of the contestants. As I filtered through the files, a few of the entries caught my eye. I just looked at the cover sheet that had the name of their cooked dish and a five answer questionnaire. Since the files were in alphabetical order I'll say what matters. Just the facts. Trust me.

Sheila Deeth, who has written many letters of complaint to cake and cookie makers about their products being too sweet and recently had a protest sit-in on her front porch to rid the world of canned sweetened tea. She had told the librarian her viewpoints are not necessarily British, over high tea. Her Mum of course agreed with her and adjusted the lemon wedge on her teacup. So, it is rather surprising her entry was named, 'Six Legs Up Caramel Dandies.'
Her answer to the first question, 'What do you consider an All American breakfast?' was no surprise to anyone named Sheila, as she wrote, "Melba toast covered with Vegemite in a bowl of maple syrup."

Now Wilma's entry puzzles me. It's called "Honey Pot Trot." I can only imagine the ingredients, as she noted this is made in her fine ceramic flowery flushing bowl and not on a stove. Wilma is no slouch as she was a previous winner of last year's picturesque 'Cooking In A Bikini Pie Contest' held in a convoy in conjunction with a Burt Reynolds look alike contest won by Barbara B of course. Wilma's Blue Ribbon winner was "Green Apple Maggot Tarts." (Her pie won because of the protein content). I'm sure none of Wilma's neighbors are surprised to her answer to an All American breakfast. She simply writes, "Anything I can catch." Now that is modesty unless you believe it ain't.

I thought B was after W. I mean people named William are usually called Bill. What's this?: A John Beck entry, and in the margins he wrote my middle name isn't Harris, nor could it be because I have an elephant memory. However, no middle name was given, but his entry was a bit too mellow sounding. He calls it, "Blow Your Socks Off Chili." This of course made me think of Elsie Duggan, one of the judges. No, there was no tryst, but there is the twist that they know each other, but I don't want to speculate or cause gossip of vote riggin' or other unsavory and herbless recipes. You may and of course it's encouraged in commentary form. Please watch your grammar with John as he said his All American breakfast was eaten with his long johns on.

There are more contestants. Yes, you know who you are. Going through the files has made me hungry for whatever hit that gorgeous Chevrolet.