Progress Report

Hi all - Thanks for the prayers and well-wishes earlier today. Please keep them coming. :-(

I have a new 3 inch long scar on my neck and was told earlier that my head will be cocked to one side for a month until the deep stitches dissolve. It's like they sewed my head back on crooked. (More basal cell skin cancer for those of you who didn't read the earlier article.)

I am so bummed. They took the first slice, then I waited for the results for about a half hour. They said they had to take more tissue - they did not get it all. So they numbed me up again, basically started all over, and went deeper. I waited another half hour and finally found out they got all the cancer. It was another hour before they could stitch me up, and it hurt like... and they had to trim some of my hair by the incision... all in all, a very unpleasant experience.

The worst part is feeling like I'm leaning to the left. My neck is stiff, along with my neck, back and shoulders. Among other things, I can barely stand to hold the phone to my ear. It's not extremely painful, just very uncomfortable. It pulls terribly. I'm not supposed to turn my neck, so can't drive either.

I really thought I'd be back up and running by Wednesday at the latest. When they started saying words like "in the long run", which usually means 2 - 5 years, and in regard to the stiffness and pulling, a month, which seems like forever given my busy schedule and plans to promote my book (and look lovely doing it), I really had a melt-down. I made it out of the office before the tears came, but just barely. You guys have probably figured out by now that I'm the multi-task queen... I've got a lot going on - all the time. Which is how I want it, but I truly can barely keep up with my work load now, so the thought of being slowed down, even a little, just wreaks havoc with my entire life.

To top off my discouraging day, I got a call while in surgery saying my one full time employee has the flu. She won't be here tomorrow either, and we have a very busy day ahead. I just don't see how I can go about my job and get everything done that I need to do feeling this way and being constantly irritated by the pressure of having my head sewed on crooked. Then, they wanted us to pay our bill, which was $600, and that was before today's surgery. Thankfully, we have insurance, but because a new year has started, our deductible isn't met.

And, because there is severe fog tonight and more snow and blizzard strength winds forecast for tomorrow and Wednesday, my husband stayed at the parsonage. I had to stay here since my staff member is sick. So no snugly husband to make me feel better. And, if the weather doesn't improve, I won't get to see my nieces on Wednesday. It is the highlight of my week...

And... the site of my other incision hurts even worse than this one. When they took the stitches out, it popped open, and I have blisters all around the site from the adhesive in band-aids and tape. I am evidently allergic to it (it's not latex, I've tried the other kind0.

There. Have I complained enough? :-) Sorry. I just feel very discouraged right now and had to vent. I know many of you have it much worse than I, and I am truly sorry for whining.

Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

Sleep tight. Actually, don't. The word tight makes me cringe right now.

Trying to think serene thoughts...