"I've got patchiss!"

last week a friend of mine approached me at a club we both attend and said "Bridget you're a proper nurse aren't you?"  I smiled and replied "Well, its been a while - I used to be - what can I do for you?" her face crumpled and tears sprung to her eyes "I'm in such pain - its not big pain and during the day I can manage but in the night I can't sleep properly I don't want to bother the doctor because really its not too bad and I thought you might know what I can do" I placed my hand on her shoulder and  told  that she deserved to be without pain and there's not a minimum level of pain required to see the doctor, she would not be wasting doctors time and while i was able to give her some suggestions for easing her discomfort i told her firmly to go see her GP. The following week at the club she came up to me again and said "I'm so glad you told me to go see my doctor - I've got patchiss" In my head i am frantically reviewing my nursing/medical memories to try and recall what the heck patchiss might be wondering is that the layman's term or the proper one and OMG I hope its not serious!! while my friend continues  "... they're great I stick them on and they keep me pain-free for hours!"

oh PATCHES!!

oops I did feel silly