Wombat Lexicon - Update.. we miss you JC

A

A&D - Angels and Demons, a book and subject of hot debate in Wombatville.

ABC Gum - Already Been Chewed gum - an excerpt from Junction Boulevard

aardvark - Wombats and Aardvarks have a long history of rivalry. Wombats are cultured, urbane, and sophisticated while Aardvarks eat termites and wear mullets.  Definition courtesy of Ken C.

aardvark, don't be an - in view of the above definition, this now makes sense.

aardvark entrails - One sure method of divining the future. Providing entrails is the only known usefulness for an Aardvark. To read the portents, hold your nose and stir the entrails with a stick.

Aardvark Huntress - a proposed change in title for Jamie's FCR entry.

Almighty Contest Administrator (ACA) - This used to be Ken, but Vivian has temporarily stolen the crown with her Phantasmorgia contest.

Alter - Alternate identity of a wombat for the purpose of a ball or to generally be irritating.

astroturf voters - "An astroturf voter is generally an alternate ID for a real person. A sock puppet can be a real person with no icon, no credentials, and usually only supports one person. Sock puppets tend to be "F&F" (Friends and Family) who love you and vote for your entry in stuff. An astroturf ID is easy to set up, especially now that Gather allows alternate IDs for users." - Definition courtesy of Pat S. Reference:  Phantasmorgia comment thread

B

Black Pearl - An official Wombat drink. The recipe was contributed by Cathy M. in the Mile High Wombats:  In a cup, pour a shot of dark rum, a shot of vodka, a shot of kahlua, and hot coffee. Squirt some whipped cream on top, and then drizzle 151 rum over the cream.

Bone saw- Prof. Jamie's favored implement of torture.. or at least that's what we say.

Bueller? - From Ferris Bueller's day off.. when a question hasn't been answered. Bueller?

Build A Plot - exercise in group writing and an example of what Wombats are really about..  The exercise culminated in Write the First Chapter.  Term and link courtesy of Pat S. NOTE:  I'm getting an 'article unavailable' message when I try to click on the Build A Plot link Pat left in the comments.  Either it's restricted to certain people or it's been deleted.

C

ChRandra Rule  - "is the law which states at some point before being added to the Non-official Wombat Central Nickname List, a wombat must have displayed a photograph of their face. It's named that after a combination of Chandra and Rand who are both infamously anonymous. A few Wombats have been grandfathered in without face pics but an albino monk will be visiting them shortly."  (Quote courtesy Steve P.)

chillingly - Steve 'off-handedly' mentioned that he coined this one as a 'DB-like overuse of bad adverbs'.  A word often used in double-duty as a saidism. For example: "The long, dark night was stygian," Steve said chillingly.  (Example courtesy of Ken C.)

Cleaning house - the act of removing offensive or disruptive posts. Performed by thread host.

D

DB - Dan Brown - author that is subject of hot debate in Wombatville

DB1 - Drive-by 1

DB10 - Drive-by 10

DH - Dear husband. substitute second letter for wife, son, daughter.

Deletist - A thread host put in a position to remove spiteful, hurtful or otherwise obnoxious comments. It's not nice to make your host a deletist.

Dingleberry - An alternative use of DB.  As in:  "Don't be a DB."

Doing a Dana - The act of posting no less than five consecutive comments without interruption. As our lovely Miss Dana F.. is fond of doing.

Don't feed the trolls - see Trolls

Ducking - the wombat way of being polite to idiots, places and things. More acceptable than what it rhymes with.

DVC - The Da Vinci Code, which does not have the stigma of A&D, still stirs Wombats up into a moderate frenzy.

DW - Dream War - Stephen Prosapio's FC1 entry.  [Pssst.  Hey, Steve - you didn't even have to post a facial photo to get listed in my article.]

E

F

FC1 - the 'First' First Chapters competition

FCC - First Chapters Crime (upcoming)

FCR - First Chapters Romance (currently running)

G

Gelatinous Muck or GM - An image plucked from an unusual FCR entry by Mr. Paul Leoncini. Used to describe writing that is, well, both gelatinous and mucky.  (Used with permission of P.A.L.)

grammalicious/non-grammalicious - Writing that does (or does not) meet the strict definition of correct grammar.  Examples:  "Wow - your chapter is perfect in every way - just grammalicious" and "Dude - your chapter mixes tenses - that is so non-grammalicious."

Gus Hall - (1910 - 2000) A famous American communist. A nickname for Dave S. and useful when you want to annoy him for his proud progressive philosophy.

GuyChickery - an 11 point scale system for rating movies and books.

+5 being total chick material

-5 representing the ultimate guy material.

0 neutral and agreeable to both

Courtesy of Sherrie Super's thread. GuyChickery Scale

H

hicken - originally a typo in a thread, it has still become a favored topic of conversation among Wombats

hicken soup - a recipe for the truly zany, submitted by Ken C., later modified by Sherrie Super.  Read for yourself.  Used to treat any number of Wombat illnesses.

The Hicken and Spleen - official wombat pub.. so named by Pat S.

While reading a DB novel, drinking a hot mixture of hot water, lemon, whisky and codeine and wearing violet Converse hightops, a kilt and an apron:
Brown one pound of fresh roadkill possum.
Add onions, bell peppers and diced jalapeno to taste.
Stir in a tablespoon of whole wheat flour.
Thin with goat milk, Red Bull and vodka.
Pour over long grain rice.
Top with Lucky Charms.
Serve with pride.

holes - this is a great place to hide after you throw a stinkbomb topic into the Wombat thread.  Courtesy of John Philipp.

I

J

Junction Boulevard - an entry in FC1

K

Kenmeister - this one is self-explanatory, don't you agree?

L

Lime wedges - were thrown at a hot tub party June B. hosted and are forever remembered.

Lucky Charm marshmallow moon - Ann B.

Lucky Charms - Ken's favorite cereal

M

Mrs. A.C.A - Ken's wife

N

"Nanny nanny boo boo" - Anyone?

No-shit-25 - A hairpin curve where the posted speed limit is more than a recommendation. Provided by Cathy M. in Mile High Wombats.

O

ollo soup - what hicken soup came to be called in Spain

P

Pitch-slapped - what happens when a group of wombats are writing pitches and they get testy.

PP - Pixie Princess, from Jamie's FCR entry. Wendy commandeered this as an endearment for her granddaughter.

POD Dollars - Print On Demand Dollars. Low class money earned from selling POD books to friends, relatives and strangers from a box stowed in the trunk of your car. Marginally better than VPDs (Vanity Press Dollars), but nowhere near as valuable as real dollars earned from real royalties paid by a real publisher. At the current exchange rate, seven POD dollars equal one real dollar.  (Ken C)

Pool Lessons - Simon was offering said lessons until Cathy's daughter popped in on us. Refers to embarrassing thread moment.

prancing - what Ken does when he gets tired of twirling

Princess Bride, The - nominated by some as the official movie of the Wombats.  Nomination courtesy of Wendy C. and Lisa F.

Point Floozy - Wombats were so named by Sherrie Super during FCR when we were accused of being on gather for the points.

Q

Queen Wombat - Lisa "Other Lisa" F., the original ranter who started it all.

R

Red stilettos and cape - Super Brenda's outfit.

Refreshitis: the incessant pushing of F5 to check on one's progress through the jungle of Gather contests. Symptoms include, crooked, frozen index fingers, zainey swirling eyes, neck cricked at a 30 degree angle, possible and probable carpal tunnel syndrome of both the wrists and shoulders. Often accompanied by spread-tush and atrophied muscles.  Definition courtesy of Judi Fennell in regards to her FCR entry.

RIIIICOOOOO!!!!!! - From FC1

Root Beer - Wombat Non-alcoholic beverage of choice.  First introduced in Sounds of Echo Bridge by James R., it became notable because of the number of laptop keyboards that were ruined in that thread.  See 'spew alert' and 'spew-worthy'.

Root Beer Floats - commonly served as refreshment.

Rule 10 - Whatever the A.C.A. wants it to be dammit! Mostly involves forcing writers in denial to enter whatever contest is being run.

S

sensitive scene - a love scene, and one that was the subject of a lengthy collaborative Wombat writing project.  The original compilation thread is here: Round Robin by Judi, and the resulting product is here:  Round Robin - Our Story.  Links provided by Pat S.

shovel - the implement given to the person who stuck their foot in their mouth. It is to dig holes. See holes

snobby - a common Wombat characteristic, according to some who know not what we are.

Sock Puppet: a derogatory term for newbie and clueless Gatherites. It refers to the orange "sock-puppet" form used by Gather when the user has not uploaded a personalized graphic. Sock Puppets were very common when fake registrations were used to inflate voting in the Gather contests. No aspersion against home-made cool (real) sock puppets is intended.

Spew Alert - required for all posts that are SO funny that they might cause you to spew mouthfuls of beverage onto your keyboard.

spew-worthy - posts that are SO funny that they cause you to spew mouthfuls of beverage onto your keyboard.

spewnography - any body or combination of words that can cause the reader to spew forth (often through multiple avenues of egress e.g mouth, nose and, of course, ears for all our Martian friends) whatever he/she happens to be digesting at the moment (John Philipp)

spleen guard - introduced during the thread at a Polish Wedding, these items came in handy when you laughed so hard that you spewed beverage AND burst your spleen wide open.  Formerly only available in medical gray, they were updated to silver/gold lame' with rhinestones during a trip to Las Vegas.

Squirrels in Space - article by Jamie one of the first Wombat articles.

stygian - another excerpt from Junction Boulevard

sweet-n-sour bobcat - A chillingly gamey dish served at Wombat weddings and other events involving the chicken dance. Originally prepared by Sherrie Super's taxidermist husband. First savored by Brooke B., who described its taste as urinous. Now part of the virtual secret initiation rite when becoming a Wombat. You have to eat roasted bobcat and you have to like it.  That is, unless you get a dispensation from the Queen Wombat, who has an affinity for cats of all breeds and species.  If a dispensation is granted, you have to eat hicken soup and you have to like it.

T

"Those who know, do not ask.  Those who ask, cannot know." - This quote from Queen Wombat Lisa was in answer to the question, "What the heck is a Wombat?!?"

twirling - Ken's favorite activity, and one now required for new Wombat initiates.  Utilikilts must be worn.  We will get a video of Ken twirling when we are worthy.

Trolls - obnoxious persons who insist on disrupting the chat thread.

U

utilikilt - this is Ken's favorite outfit - best worn with red stilettos, which he allegedly stole from one of the female Wombats.

V

W

"Where's Sherrie or Cathy?" - Someone gave me the reason for this, but now I can't find it.

WiD - Writer in Denial or more recently: Writer in Disguise. Amusing name for Pat S. who wrote thousands of words of intelligent commentary, a fine poem about a pirate (Calico Jack), was a finalist in the First Paragraphs Competition and submitted an excellent short story (Forever, My Love) in thePhantasmorgia - Terrifying Tales Competition while humorously denying her obvious talent as a writer.  Definition courtesy of Ken C.

Writin' Wombats - A convivial group of writers, readers and critics in support of each others' work. A communal bulletin board to post links to your writing, share news, gossip, rants and triumphs.  (Pat S.)

Wombativerse - the original name for the cyberspace in which Wombats are currently residing.  At some point, I erroneously bastardized the name to 'Wombatville'.

Wombatlette - with or without the last 'e' - a new Wombat.

X

Y

Yorkism - any of a number of terms coined by Mark York, only one of which has been communicated to the author of this Lexicon.  See 'young punk'.

young punk - 'Yorkism' reference to Steve.  Courtesy of Mark York via Pat S.

Z

(c) 2007 Dan Brown - There ya go, Ken!