You sit there, unmoving heaviness,
once poised delicately on the edge of happiness,
now plunged into mechanical existence by this crushing albatross.
Such despair as it swallows your essence and squeezes your fleshy frame until
nothing remains but the boneless void you thought you weren't.
A public emptiness.
You dream to slip purposefully through life's oily fingers,
freefalling into unknown pastures,
pastures not of this earthly heaven and hell but
somewhere else in the space between your true fantasy and this false reality.
A private emptiness.
And so it happens that you find yourself to be nowhere.
Just nowhere.
Walking in your shoes,
one foot after another,
one breath after another,
one life after another.
A solitary emptiness.
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Comments: 45
Hugs and blessings - S.
somewhere else in the space between your true fantasy and this false reality.
This line is the one that got me the most. Your way with words was gripping.
Well written, my friend.
nothing remains but the boneless void you thought you weren't."
That has to be one of the deepest descriptions of total despair I've ever read.
Well written, Sue. But don't go there!
Either way, it's an excellent emotional expression.
Sue . . . Sue ~ The pen calls out to you because your ink runs deep.
Blessings ~
Rene
so thoroughly indoctrinated, we who unfree
our selves
isolation
bitter fruit, boiled water
better than public disrepair
and excellent reminder for us to pay attention NOW.
I love the first three lines and the imagery evoked by them. The extended metaphors of "weight" and "falling" work very effectively to convey the depressive state of mind.
Also, the refrain of " A .... emptiness" at the end of each verse reinforces the message.
I can totally relate to the situation described by this poem. In fact, I have written a short story called
THE FIND that deals with similar themes.
Very well worded.
"now plunged into mechanical existence by this crushing albatross."
Marvelous.