Tonight truth has been on my mind mostly due to television programming. My husband and I always watch American Idol and are often amazed that some of the contestants actually believe they have talent. Sometimes when a person enjoys something such as singing they can be deaf to their own flaws. Are all the people that surround these people also hearing disabled? Is it so important not to hurt someones's feelings that your willing to let them make a fool out of themselves on television? With these thoughts in mind I picked up The Book Of Questions by Gregory Stock, PH.D. and the following question leaped out at me.
A close friend asks---and genuinely wants---your opinion about something, but your opinion is one that he is likely to find quite painful. For example, your friend is an artist and asks your honest estimate of his chances of being successful. You think he is an atrocious artist who hasn't the slightest chance of success. What would you do?
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Comments: 49
Have A Great & Powerful Day W/J
My answer to that particular queation, "You know. as a friend, I like whatever you do, but I am not the right person to ask. Perhaps you should talk to an expert."
After all, "Beauty IS in the eyes of the beholder."
I have a good friend who sings and plays the guitar. I think she's great, but not everybody does. And she's been working in the music business for years - she's put out two albums - without a tremendous amount of success. I don't know if she will ever be successful in the music business to the point that she can actually quit her day job and have enough money to support herself. I just can't tell the future. The important part is that she loves it. So, all in all, I think the important thing is to know when to not say anything at all.
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There is a big difference between truth and opinion. An opinion is subjective in contrast to truth which is based on knowledge of the facts. When in an awkward position with a friend where your opinion can be hurtful, instead you might consider just asking questions and listening to what they have to say.
Artful endeavors are an expression of the artist that may or not be understood or accepted by a large audience and certainly NOT by everyone. An artist puts their works and inner self out into the world for acceptance and/or appreciation of their being, mindset, and talents. Your interest in their work(s) will mean more to him/her on a personal level with your interest than any negative subjective opinion can do for them in the future.
Winston Churchill had it right when he wrote, "It's not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the area; who's face is marred with dust and sweat and blood..."
Ask questions instead - the answers might surprise you.