Three Criticisms about the God of Genesis

Some of my recent online augmenting has prompted several trips to the book of Genesis, and subsequently sparked a few nits that I haven't picked yet. Ergo, here are three mini-rants dealing with the books themes of perfection, knowledge, and parenthood:

#1: Naked and Unashamed
One way we learn about how Eden was "perfect" is that the Garden's only two human inhabitants were "naked...and unashamed". I take that to mean that if they were embarrassed at the sight of one another's bodies (or just didn't want to look at hoo-hoos), that would be bad and thus not perfect. So it's a good thing to be naked and not give a care. Score one, nudists! Of course, we learn from Genesis 3:7 that they didn't know they were naked and therefore could not have been ashamed because of ignorance. And once they had Knowledge about such things, they clothed themselves, because being naked is bad.

This segues into...

#2: Perfection Demands Lack of Knowledge
A lot of Christians (and I suppose, Jews) would charge the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil as the reason for the way things are today (meaning rape, famine, only living 80 years or so); or more specifically, Adam and Eve's eating of the fruit of said Tree. But recall that Genesis has already set up the scene as being perfect -- no death, disease, worries, etc. Lack of knowledge about being naked, lack of knowledge about what good and bad are...these things don't sound like perfection to me. Perfection in the sense of ignorant bliss, maybe. Perhaps it's just my love for knowledge and the way it lifts the blind and unenlightened out of the mires of superstition and ignorance, but I'd say that if the two of them (let's call them Adam and Eve) did not have knowledge -- of any kind -- then they were imperfect.

This ties into my final rant...

#3: God Is a Bad Parent
So you've got a talking snake who tells Eve it's okay to eat of the Tree, because she would gain Knowledge and be "like God". He also assures her that she won't die that day, contrary to what her creator threatened. Essentially, you've got a young girl who doesn't know right from wrong, being tempted by a scary guy in a van with candy. I somewhat agree with the snake...after all, they didn't die that day and they learned (apparently) what God knows. But even if they were lied to, and eating of the Tree of Knowledge really was the reason for the downfall of humankind, does the blame really lie with Adam and Eve?

An omniscient deity would have already foresaw this fall and many (including myself) have written extensively about it before, so we'll leave that part of it alone for now. After all, just sticking with Genesis, the extent of God's knowledge is unknown. So for that sake, let's just assume that the "Almighty" didn't know his clueless kid could be so easily tricked and eat the edible fruit from the tree he planted within her reach. (Anybody else see three easy ways this could have all been avoided?)

I get this all the time -- God did the just and righteous thing; you'd do the same if you had kids. Oh would I? Those of you who see your god as a father figure probably rationalize this way a lot: you don't know as much as your Sky Daddy; if you disobey he's gonna burn you forever and you would deserve it. Doesn't sound like good parenting to me. Even though I don't have children of my own, I'd like to offer some advice to Yahweh in order to keep this from happening again in the NEXT universe he decides to create.

• Suggestion 1: Talk to your kids. Don't keep secrets from them; let them know what's going on even if it's hard for them to comprehend. You're all-powerful...find a way. At the very least, create them with the ability to "get it". Make sure they understand right from wrong -- especially if doing the wrong thing will result in the whole lot of them being cursed forever and forced to live in a world that is less perfect than you wanted. Teach them kindness by being kind. Teach them how the world works. Teach them virtues that will benefit them and make their lives more complete. Teach, don't threaten.

• Suggestion 2: Don't put harmful things in their reach. Even us lowly fallen humans have learned that kids who don't understand consequences can get into trouble, and have added "Keep out of reach of children" as a warning of such scenarios. If you've moved the harmful thing out of their reach and you think there's even the slightest chance they could still hurt themselves, see suggestion number one again and talk to them about it. (Note: this doesn't mean threaten them. This means explain why they would be better off staying away from the harmful thing.)

• Suggestion 3: Don't go apeshit if they don't listen to you. I realize that it was probably your first time with kids, but you should realize that they don't know as much as you do (even if you don't know everything). You have to teach them how to learn and show them what you want them to know. When they mess up, correct it with compassion, not damnation. Be willing to forgive right there on the spot (not a few thousand years later when you have to kill yourself to make a loophole in the rules). Look, I don't mean to armchair-psychoanalyze you but you need to get a grip on your temper. With great power comes great responsibility, God, and I don't think you've shown that you're capable of caring for the things that you make. We can take care of each other far better.

-STA