I'd like some opinions. Do you think a picture of someone who is deceased is in poor taste or OK because it's just a part of life, as long as the settings are on adult?
My great grandma died in December. We have lots of pictures from the funeral. That includes some of her body as it was open casket. Honestly, she looked really good. The mortician made her look better then she really looked at the end of her life. I've been uploading pictures into albums on Gather and was going to do the funeral ones. There are several that I can still do in a folder but I am hesitant about putting the ones of her body. I did a search on Gather to see if I could find any and how the reaction was but I didn't really find any except of Bonnie (from Bonnie and Clyde).
So what is your opinion? Too depressing and unsettling for Gather? Or is it OK as long as you have it on adult setting?
rate
email
print
link to this page
Comments: 52
You could have a folder named 'Funeral' or something of that nature to warn viewers before they actually viewed the pics. That way if they are curious and look, they have no reason to complain because you titled it appropriately.
I do think it would be upsetting to some people if you published them to the general public.
But that jsut me you need to do what will put your heart at ease the most, if sharing them helps, post them, just use the adult settings to play it safe.
I wouldn't do it, but I think it's a personal choice
I think a lot of it depends on what area of the country or what family traditions are. In my family, we've always taken funeral pictures. My husband's family thinks it's just the most awful thing in the world. (Thank goodness he told me as I grabbed my camera headed for the first funeral we attended in his family.)
I just read Princess Spanky Pants' comment, so I'm really echoing her. (I wonder now if I'm married to one of her cousins.) It is very common in rural areas of the South.
I sometimes publish things to a certain group that I wouldn't want anyone to see. I think if you label it clearly and it's done in a way people can avoid it, that would be good.
I thought it would make a good discussion point because I've seen almost everything published here on Gather but no photos how I mentioned. I wouldn't want to scar or upset someone, you know?
I appreciate that you put it out there to the members before you just did it. That shows you have a great amount of respect for other peoples' feelings.
I've never taken photos at a funeral before
It seems like something so personal shouldn't be posted for everyone to flip through.
If you do chose to put them up, I suggest family/close friends only...or clearly labeling them...tho that might get some comments that would be offensive to you.
I personally would not look at them. But to each his own. As I have taken pictures when my sister died. (I am from the north) I keep them so I can remember her. I even have a picture of sisters gravestone. So, I can look at when I moved 1200 miles away and could no longer visit.
I think pictures like that are more on a personal level type thing. But be warned may get a low rater hitting those pictures. Just ask yourself if that would bother you? If not, than post away.
I have a question, why would people say flag it as an adult picture? In my opinion a picture of someone in a casket is not adult material. because they are dead and everything is more than likely covered up.
So I would personally have no objections to pictures of an open casket; death happens every day. But I do wonder why humans in general seem to focus on the costume when the actor has long since left the stage.
She is always the aunt who attended all wakes and kept her eye on the kitchen. Oh, Marie, let me scrape that into my fireking bowl. You won't eat that all along. Jean, I want to cut that cake in have and I've got the box here all ready for it. If the widow was going to spend a few days with a sympathetic sister or cousin, Myrtle would then make a second forage through the kichen taking perishables that might spoil while the bereaved is gone. My Dad would joke on the way home, '"You suppose Mryt left her any toilet paper or clorox?"
My parents let us know they did not want public viewings. We left their caskets open for two hours, for immediate family and close friends. We had collages of photos from different times in their lives for the public viewings. My mother died in November, so my grandchildren experienced both - the open casket for a little while and then closed with pictures. Their other grandmother died suddenly in December and my granddaughter said she hoped the casket would be open (it was) because, "I need to see my Grandma one more time." I never thought I would agree, but her death was so sudden and totally unexpected that it was hard for me to believe it had really happened until I saw her.
I was raised in an Irish-wake family. You know, where Grandpa is in the living room suspended between two dining room chairs while the party is going on around him. Death doesn't bother me at all...it's a part of life. If you think your G-G looked nice in the casket, post it. Too bad if people don't like it....they don't have to look or comment.
Certainly it's a matter of personal preference, but I suspect most people on Gather wouldn't seek out such photos if they didn't have a personal connection to the deceased. As far as others, who are unfamiliar with the deceased but actually want to view such photos, well... I guess you'd have to think about the nature of their interest. Is it respectful or simply some sort of macabre curiosity?
Personally, I think I would keep such photos limited to a family context, whether here on Gather or in a family-and-close-friends-only online photo album. Again, as far as the loved one's that I've lost, I really want to see photos of them enjoying life.
if they aren't grizzly death shots, i don't see the problem.