Read Love Your Enemy #1
I over reacted. When I pulled my article up for the first time I was afraid some actually felt I was trying to make enemies out of all that hurt them, even family. Technically, that is what I was saying but tongue in cheek doesn't come across on paper :)
I realize the majority of you are not in a crises at the moment where you would say bitterness is something you are fighting. But ... believe me, you are capable of harboring those feelings. Most of us (and I'm very easy going) have had, or will have, a few times in our life where the problem is BIG. And it may be just around the corner.
While fighting my big one ... God taught me some truths that changed my life. A truth I began to apply every day to every little distraction and irritation. At home, at work, at the grocery store, church, my back yard etc.
I believe it is something God intends us to know. It is a gift He intends us to receive.
Learn now, why you don't need it :)
OK ... let's define our terms.
We're going to make up our own definition and it will out work just fine.
THE ENEMY
Anyone that brings any degree of angst into your life for any period of time, be it short term or over a life time.
You'll notice I X'd out 'yours' above. Mom and Dad may be lions in defending their children and spouses against outsiders ... but children and spouses and parents and siblings and cousins all spend their time on the enemy list many times throughout their lifetime. Sometimes for an afternoon, sometimes for longer periods.
Your boss; co workers; neighbors; in laws; best friend; school mates. A man or woman at church ...or work ...or Gather ...that does everything better than you & does it before you get a chance to do it :)
Take the time to let your mind wonder a little. Try to catch those natural happenings in your life and pull them out to look at them. Who irritates you?
We're going to add another group to the enemy list. People that add discomfort to your life. That intrude upon the peace and joy of your life by their very existence. The messy; hugely fat; the ugly; the obnoxious; the lower social level; the poorly educated; poorly dressed; the mentally challenged. You may be thinking right now, "Oh no, no, no. Not me. I'm not that kind of person." How would you know when you usually avoid people like that? If you enter a room, they are not the ones you go to sit by. Be honest with yourself now.
With these new thoughts in mind, you may want to go back and alter your list on Enemy #1 :) If you haven't read #1 , please go back and read those also.
We'll talk about all that later. I would suggest you run these lessons off and keep them in a folder. If you are a Christian, ask God to open your eyes and help you see your own heart and He will do so. Actually, non Christians do so also. I have a wonderful story about a non Christian later that proves that forgiving your enemy works for non Christians as well as Christians. It's like gravity ... the laws of gravity work no matter what your philosophy of life happens to be.
Now that we've defined who the enemy is, let's go on to the next word.
LOVE
"Love your enemy." What is it EXACTLY that you are supposed to do to your enemy?
First, let's look at what God is NOT saying.
- He is not saying;
"Like your enemy."
or "Let your enemy walk all over you."
or "Think they're wonderful."
or "Feel good toward them."
What is love? There are two dynamics that are often mistaken for love.
. 1 LIKE; you might really, really like someone. Like is the measure of how much pleasure someone gives YOU. It has nothing to do with loving.
. 2 NEED; you might really, really need someone. Need is the measure of how much you rely on the satisfaction someone gives YOU. It has nothing to do with loving.
LIKING and NEEDING are self serving. They involve your 'FEELINGS'.
It's OK to surround yourself with friends that pleasure you by being likeable and meeting your needs within moderation. I hope you do the same for them.
God doesn't put demands on your feelings. GOD will take care of your feelings. In fact, that is the amazing thing about loving your enemy ... the moment you love him, you find God immidiately changes your feelings. Something you are unable to do.
So what does He want?
Let's see what He says.
Luke 6:27-28 "But I say to you who hear, LOVE your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. NASU
Notice how God describes love? He just made 4 statements. And He specifically directed the statements to those who would HEAR (last lesson :). If you are looking to be honest and expose yourself to God ... asking Him to teach you ... you have ears to hear. If you are just doing this to be nice to me ... or to get points you won't hear what He is saying. Just drop right down to the comment section.
We are to hear 4 commands. The last 3 are a fulfillment of the first. God says loving is giving. Giving to someone that which is helpful to him is love. Listen to this;
John 3:16 "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son . . . "
When God first begin teaching me about loving my enemy, my husband had just left me for a woman that came to my Bible studies. In fact, I had led her to Christ a short time before. We were neighbors and became friends. (Spouse and I had 6 children of which 4 were teen agers, 2 under eleven. We also had two teen agers we had literally taken in off the street as we also had teen Bible studies that ended up drawing from that drug crowd.)
I had begged God to help me get rid of bitterness.
And so He did :)
Shortly before my test was to begin (Unknown to me) I ran across an interesting verse. Prov 3:27 Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it. Hmmmm. Do not withhold good ... when it is in your power to do it. I thought that was interesting. How often we have opportunity to point out people's strenghts to them. All the time. We don't know how others view us. We can encourage people often by sharing honestly what is good about them. Never exagerate ... that ruins the whole thing. It fails to do God's work. I think I learned that for a reason.
(Tuck it away in your mind. It is an easy way to love someone & encourage them in gifts God has given them.)
Back to me ... :) I couldn't control my feelings ... and God didn't ask me to. But give? Give what? I couldn't even smile at her. And then my phone rang. It was the wife of my husband's brother. She had just met G the night before when My spouse had taken His girl friend over to meet them. My sister in law began to tell me how angry she was at what he had done. How much she disliked the woman. NOW. DO IT NOW. His m
essage came through loud and clear. But what? I knew. Truth. Good truth. I couldn't be nice to her to her face, but I could talk nice about her behind her back.
So I began to tell the caller what a tough upbringing G had had. Her Mother had married 8 husbands. Her Mom never cared much for her. Some of the men had done wrong things to her. She was very needy. As I talked, Sis-I-Law softened & became more understanding. I told her my spouse didn't mean to hurt me; his feeling just overwhelmed him and he wasn't strong enough to say no.
When I hung up I was actually smiling from ear to ear. I had given to my enemy and God had given to me JOY. What a strange exchange. I was to find out He would faithfully makes that exchange every time I gave.
Now I didn't stay smiling forever :) The anger slipped back in ... but I was, after one act of obedience, a bit of a different person in the midst of a huge crises.
A couple of days later I received another opportunity. Some months before, G had called me around 2 AM saying her sister, who lived in a town a little ways off, was threatening to commit suicide. Would I go with her. We left right away; had a very productive and sweet time with her sister. It was this sister that was calling me.
I already knew what to do. :) I told her that I had been the one that led G to Christ. There is usually an ongoing love and relationship between the two people involved in the new birth. I knew G loved me and wouldn't have hurt me deliberately. Her emotions just got the best of her. I told her I was sad and mad but I would get over it and G needed her right now.
Again ... it was truth. And as I spoke it, just as in the first conversation, I knew it was true. It was a truth I hadn't considered before because I was only focused on what she had done to me.
When I hung up ... I was different. I had given love to my enemy. I had seen new truth. I had peace ... fragile, but still there; at least for that moment.
Something else. I was obeying God. I felt in control.
This is getting too long, but there are many examples I want to give you so that you can know through and through that God gives us instruction for a reason.
I usually teach this to a group of home study people, sometimes as a speaker, and I mail them a couple of hand outs a few days later. And pass out a few. I will post a hand out called Love Your Enemy 2 1/2 momentarily and you can see how I progress through some of the initial journey of my separation and divorce. Keep in mind at all times your own situation that needs changed. How you can apply the practical advise so that you too may feel the JOY of God. He has never one time failed to bless my obedience with joy.
God so loved that He gave ... He took ACTION. There are many more examples but think about the people that you resent or have hurt you. This can be your first step in obedience to God. Look for a chance to talk nice about them behind their backs :)
Everyone work on it. Then come and comment. This is the easy one. You need to start here. You'll be surprised if you ask God how well He will lead you. This is His idea, not mine.
As time went on, I learned what irritated her and how much my power over him bothered her. God told me the hard facts. Please read the essay I post tomorrow so you can see how brutally honest I chose to be with myself. I was fighting for survival and knew I had to be very honest. It will help you to also be honest with yourselves.
Please come back and share your experience with us on this #2. I'll be praying for you.
I posted my plan of attack for my divorce God's Way of Escape
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Comments: 85
Once again, you have amazed and inspired me. You turn obstacles and bitterness into opportunities to display grace and love. You make me think of Jesus' prayer from the cross in the midst of His incredible suffering:
"Forgive them Father for they know not what they do. . . "
I have work to do in this area - I appreciate your willingness to share and for your prayers.
His love and peace to you, -Mark
my own personal opinion, is to love and pray for people that have
hurt you or tried to hurt you. When I was a teenager, or in my 20's,
I wasn't very good at it. I've gotten much better at it as time has
gone by.
One of the things that have helped me, in addition to Jesus' teachings,
was something my Mother taught me. She always said, "love draws a
circle and draws people in, and hate draws a circle and pushes people
out."
And I learned resentment and bitterness eat you alive. It doesn't do
anything to the other person. Having said that, pain is still pain, and
it takes time to work through it all. God bless,
Last monday I was with in SIL taking her to a food bank. She went on and on how her parents did her wrong, how they are lying, transferre everything her her grandmother (who has since died) name to a friend than filed bankruptcy. How her father is getting unemployment checks. Plus drawing an out of state pension (which he has not told unemployment.) I could go on and on. She went on about how her mother says there won't be much for Christmas this year. I just looked at SIL and said I am not expecting anything from the in laws or for my kids. As they are not talking to us. But the in laws were more than welcome to come over if they so wished. She went on to say how her mother bought stuff at the dollar tree to save money. When she could well afford to buy something more expensive. I agree but I did tell her the point of Christmas was not to buy the most exspenive stuff. Nor is it to get presents at all. If her mother choose to get something, it was the the thought that counts. Not anything else. My SIL than went on on how her mother was such a selfish and some other words I will not repeat. I told her mother gave her a place to live for over a year while she looked for another job. She made you dinners and bought you groceries. She did nothing like that for her brother (my husband) or his family. But am I complaining no. I am greatful she was at least able to help her. Than I told her that I pray daily for her parents, my husband and the situation that has happened between them. She went to rant some more. I asked her to please drop it as I wish to not talk about her parenst anymore.
I am sure now that I think about it. I could have said some other things in my in laws favor. But at the time the bitterness was eating me up0 and I could not think. So, I have been praying for when it happens again. I know that it will that God give me the ability to choose the right words of hope, compassion, kindness and more.
Hugs and blessings - S.
Poet Dawn;
ms mary bryant;
Thanks for coming by and commenting to all of you. I appreciate it.
I once counted how many times He told us to love our enemy. Many times. He said it for a reason and rewards every act of obedience with a measure of joy. Maybe the joy just comes from making eye contact with the Father. But joy is so much better than bitterness.
If there is one thing I want people to hear Lee, it is that I was NOT being a nice person. I was desperate for help and that is all He offered so I took it. When it worked ... I was surprised and held onto it like a life jacket. To begin with I was just being rescued. But obedience does wonderful things. Now I love to please God by obeying. That's not how it started :)
I appreciate your encouragement. Look for an enemy today :) Someone that's rude to you and give them a kiss. Then you'll really be happy. On the CHEEK that is :)
Hi tee bee. I don't usually have enemies. As it says in the article ... it is a tongue in cheek use of the word for people that just naturally irritate us occasionally for the most part. Our husbands leaving us only happens occasionally :)
That's the problem ... sometimes our children do get hurt. What do we do then? Listen to the news; people's children are getting hurt every day.
Even then, God gives us a way of escape from hate or bitterness. He still calls on us to love our enemy. God taught me the hard way to love the person that hurt my children. Remember ... we aren't talking about feelings here. Only actions.
Later in the lesson, you will know whay terrible thing happened to my children.
You are a good son and brother. It is easy, as I've gotten to know you a little, to hear that in your conversation regarding your sister and Mom.
You're also right we have to grow into a lot of this knowledge. Learning to live takes a lifetime :):) And a God that is very present.
But how do you handle it meanwhile?
I think you did just right. Tried to defend. Yet were honest; didn't pretend there were no problems; then finally asked her to stop. I can't think what other choice you had. How nice that you took her up there to get her food when you knew how the conversation was going to go.
You know you are hanging on my monitor :) I'm kind of excited about what you said. I'll pray also that God will give you words to say and that He Himself will penetrat the whole In Law family.
I want you to have a happy carefree Christmas mini; you and your sweet little hubby.
Thanks for your encouragement.
I already read your post on the hand out. And you are right about acknowledging the truth. So little of my conversation can be written down it might be misleading. I did note in the article I had told her sister I was angry with her. Actually, I got pretty free to pour out everything :):) The bad and the good. There were other things going on also and the kids and I all kind of pulled back for awhile and talked non stop amoung ourselves. I had adult and teen age Bible studies at my house and they all continued. School continued ... so there was enough outside contact.
& I never pretended with them. Just kept making choices. But choosing to give in spite of anger was still very good. Very healing to see God using me even when I was a mess :)
It's not the way we would raise our children :) We do all we can to prevent them from pain. But for some His own reasons He has set the world thustly. It really is like a potter sanding off his piece. If obeying Him makes the sanding a little less painful, I'm going to obey Him. Our of pure selfishness :)
But, as the battle raged, I began to feel stronger, and my wounds healed, and I won, and then I saw the enemy and what do you know? They were not the enemy at all; they were just like me. And God let me feel His love for them. Isn't that the way the story ends?
Everyone needs to reed all of Sandy S's short stories. Sandy S
They are amazing. They will increase your love for God.
There is much more to our story whick I will get into a little later in the series.
It all leaves me wondering how people that do not have God living in them can get through life. I know lot's of nice, happy people that don't know the Lord. There are many here in Gather. That is hard for me to fathom. I think I would be resentful of life for hurting so many people if it was all pointless.
Maybe some of you reading this can explaine where your joy and hope come from if you are one that does not have the Lord in your life.
I finally made it to your article , i had saved it to read it later but life intervened ....
I totally agree with your line of thought . Love and forgiveness is a basic judeo-christian rule.
whether you adhere to a religious philosophy or not , truth is that it is a waste of energy to be angry with a man who behaves badly, just as it is to be angry with a car that won't go.
In my whole life, no one has ever done that for me. Whether it was right or productive or not, someone thought enough of you and was loyal enough to take your part. That is a wonderful gift.
You write so eloquently and naturally about these issues, Glome.
The problem is, they obviously think you did something wrong. That's where you'll have to start.
Is your brother near by? Could you visit him? Do you think if you went and just hugged him and said something as nebulous as 'I love you and I'm sorry if you think I've done something unkind; I never intended to." Would that do? Would he be open to talk?
He can probably never admit he deserved to have his children taken away. That kind of truth he probably hasn't been able to admit to himself. You'll need to leave that subject with God and try to move around it probably.
What could you say to him that is true? Do you love him? Do you want him to have peace with the Lord? Was he a fun brother when you were little? Are those things you could say.
Your friend. That is too difficult to even guess at. A friendship messed up over a gift. I have a feeling whatever it is ought to be being laughed about by this time. But getting there is the problem :)
Was it your gift to her? Go get her another one and wrap it beautifully. Take her favorite candy bar and just show up on her door step. But only if God says yes. These are just thoughts. He will guide you, not me.
I've already prayed for you on these. Let us know if a plan begins to form. :)
My husband came 14 years later and did the same. I had prayed for him for 17 yrs prior to his leaving and continued to pray, but did not think he knew the Lord. Didn't know for sure. But knew God would answer one day.
He told me the strangest thing when he came. He said he was always afraid he wasn't really saved ... and during the time he left me and the children (& other things I'll share later later) God made Himself known so sweetly to him that he finally knew that he belonged to God. Right when he least deserved it, God said "I love you. You are Mine."
Isn't that just like God?
Thanks for sharing your wonderful story. Anyone else with forgiveness stories?
But thanks for doing so anyway. To have nothing between ourselves and anyone else that is negative is such a wonderful thing. I hope you read minipin's comment directly over your post. A once in a lifetime experience. I had the same one. You kind of feel like singing the alleleuia chorus right there! :)
I finally dropped my Shofar icon from Utube in my 'Spiritual' folder on my desk today. I kept it out to listen every now and then.
Calling them an enemy is tongue in cheek. Here's why I was saying that. At the time when my spouse first left I was hurt and angry at both of them. I felt bitterness. That's when God came in and revealled lots of ways of escape for me. Taught me how to love my enemy.
Later, I began to use the same truths on everyday irritations or anything unpleasant that came along. Even with my children. So in order to pass that along, I wrote the joking introduction acting as though everyone was the enemy except selfish us :) But we are to love them anyway. Love them, not in feelings because sometimes we can't, but love them by giving good to them. So it is all tongue in cheek. I don't really consider them enemies.
I hope that helps. I don't always get things across too well Cassandra. It's probably good you mentioned it so I could go over it here in comments.
Jan ... what you just said is amazing. We are such visual creatures :) but you have one of the sweetest faces on Gather. Your posts are always so nice. I would think people would be very protective of you. That makes me sad.
Well, have you ever needed that? Have you been wrongly accused where you needed a knight in armour? Oh well, yes, I'm sure. Anyone living in a world of humans has occassions where people think wrongly of them.
Well if you ever get into a fight with anyone on Gather, come get me and I will come right over there and help you love them. Hahahaha. Right after I take up for you :)
I was glad afterwards that the children had taken the journey with me and watched God's faithfulness. Ater they left the kids were all excited to tell me that while we were together it started snowing outside. :):) They thought God was celebrating just for us.
But there's a lot in your post than just a need for cleve ways to love; I can tell you are sick of hurting people. I'll take it seriously. I already ran your post and icon off and will keep it by my computer till we get through this series.
Andrea, God can change things. I don't know it this will help; if you need a pastor or counselor ... but my prayer will be that God give you direction, release and hope.
If you have a particular situation you'd like us to help you love, give them to us one at a time and we'll work at it.
Meanwhile, please anyone, feel free to email me if you ever wanted to talk off line.
Thanks for your boldness Andrea. I think something good will happen.
But a few more examples will get people's minds working on some of their own possibilities.
Thanks for coming by and commenting.
love/printing back either later today or even perhaps tomorrow to give a solid resonse ~ love and pinky ~J
You take other people to heart and they really, really become part of your existence. I think I used to be like that more than I am now, but I don't think as deeply as you.
I have always taught Bible studies from my home and usually quite a few women; sometimes men and women. But that leads to lots of phone calls over problems etc. If I had no children and no spouse I could have lived my whole life for that but ... I had to make radical changes. I finally had to say no phone calls after 3:30. That's extreme but my children were coming home from school and that was my favorite part of the day. We all sat around the living room and talked about what happened during the day; and I just never did talk on the phone more than a few minutes when my husband was home unless he was in the basement working or something.
Anyway, it drastically lightened my mental and emotional load. Loving friends and carrying them can be draining. But also, it can be ministry. God said He gave gifts to men ... you may be a healer walking through your life loving and advising. People are lucky to be your friend. Vito is lucky to be your husband :):)
Thanks for taking such care in reading these. I know they are very long. I try to cut back but ... you know how it is :)
It seems no matter what life may throw at you, you stay afloat very well. Thank you for another inspirational piece.
I have your poem folded up in a couple of those little baggies that babies sleep in. You know, they have arms and just a big bag for the feet with a zipper. My daughter that gave up Cheyanna now has a tiny baby. She has two holes in her heart but thins seem to be going well for adoption. I can't wait for her to read it.
I've no idea what I said the first time around - but I will say this time that people who are so consumed by their bitterness like minipin talked about, that they are deaf and blind to reality, will drain my energy level in about 15 minutes. It effects my spirit and all I want to do is get far away.
You're right, they not only drain their own energy but every one else's.
Thanks for taking the time to read Rose. And a helpful comment.
Maybe you can get the strength later to repost. You can repost anytime. I thought about having a particular article later to encourage people to share & hunt for plans of attacks together. We may do that but on the other hand, sometimes you have to do it when the moment strikes :)
It's encouraging to me that you hear what He is saying. I've already prayed that He gives you understanding and guidance. We'll watch ... later :)
You know I really should have brought up other things that need to be taken into consideration. Sometimes, the person needs to be confronted. In fact, some type of confrontation would be best in most situations I would think.
Nancy, I hate it but I copied those requests before I deleted my article & just threw them away yesterday or the day before. You have had TERRIBLE luck with this thread :):)
I don't remember what it said.
Just from what you said, I'm wondering if there needs to be some conversation. Does she know what she did? Have you two ever discussed it. Did others? Give as much detail as you can unless you're uncomfortable that it could be recognised by anyone. Then email :)
Unless you'd rather not, that's OK.
Someone I love was making hurtful comments about my family. Very deceitful comments. I had confronted her softly once before. We had a good discussion with her sharing that she knew it was jealousy that she had let get control of her. I believe there was genuine repentence. But this thing had quite a grip on her.
The next time I went to confront her I asked that her husband be present. I was very straight forward and called a spade a spade. What's it going to take to stop this? There were lies being made that were being believed by others. There were tears. Spouse reinforced the necessity for this to stop. She said she was mentally mixed up; admitted the problem. Went to a doctor. He put her on meds. They moved away.
Now for me to say I forgive & do something nice rather than first confront the problem would have been nonsense. That wouldn't have honored truth nor would it have been showing love.
Now, I haven't brought these things up before. In the last one I did somewhat. You may have read the poem Hip, Hip Hooray regarding a broken law. That is linked in the last article showing that although I encouraged someone that did wrong, I stood silent when the judge asked for reasons to show mercy to him. I did not believe he deserved mercy. Love would send him to prison. And it did.
Is the painful thing you are going through over? Still in process? Does confrontation have to take place? Or did it already and fail? Or do you have no desire to confront?
Does this fit your situation at all.
Thanks for your complete honesty. It has helped me clarify truth. I almost wish we had this conversation in the last article in the series so more would read it through out the week. But it is what it is. If someone needs the clarification, God will bring them here :)
so truthful to say they don't have strength to let go of irritation and bitterness. We've all
been in bad situations and places. Thankfully we don't have to stay.
My concern its this ... it is so easy to find an answer and be excited and praise God ... then not actually do it. The joy and freedom from obeying is overwhelming. My heart just longs for them to stay enthused until they've actually carried it out. I still love finding enemies. I have (and my children) never gotten over the instant miracle that takes place at the slightest obedience. It is just hard to get the reality of it across.
Your enthusiasm is so encouraging ... thank you so much.
Thanks for coming by ... and for send email. I need the reminders :)
I used to attract needy, bitter women. After months or years, it would end badly because I would grow tired of their being stuck depressing me and wasting my time. Almost always the break came when I would summarize what they had been repeating over and over. Now I'm wondering if being on the computer dial up all day and night is to protect me from these types of calls.
I'm going to have to pray about this. Am I shirking my Christian duty by avoiding problem people? Whatever the qnswer is, your article has been eye-opening.
When I had home Bible studies I often got pulled into those type of problems because they were so happy to have an empathetic ear to talk to. But the talking was their joy. It took a long time, but I finally just told them the truth. Don't be afraid to lose a friend. Satan himself is happy to drain your energy on useless and wasteful attemps to help.
Look at Jesus n the gospels. He told them truth. He left it to them to accept or reject. We must do the same and let them know the choice is theres but we aren't going to participate it in with them.
The truth really does set you free :)
I love the fact that you've used your own life example for this Lesson of Love & Forgiveness. I don't know if given the same situation I would have reacted the same way that you did. WE never really know how we will react to a situation or circumstance until it comes upon us. However, given that the woman who was fooling around with your husband was in your Bible Study Classes, I think I may have used her behavior; as well as your husband's behavior right there before her face as a Bible Study Lesson. I would have had the husband's bags there in the class ready for her to take with her when she left Bible Study. Wished her the best, and promptly changed the locks on the doors.
Is that mean? I don't think so. But, I may need to examine my first reactions, and see if I could do something different.
Do give me your advice Glome . . .
Rene
I was glad he was gone because I found out what he did to my children after he left. So by the time he called for a divorce I was already reeling.
If it were to happen now I would know to call the police. Believe it or not, at that time it was NEVER discussed. I was in such shock; it never occured to me to call the police. I was too ashamed to tell anyone. I blamed myself that I let that happen to my children. I wanted to cut him in pieces. I had the 8 children there and had never worked other than the summer I graduated. I was seething with resentment. He turned off his phone; I had no idea where he was staying. He sent money to us. And I was numb. I don't have any advice.
I have been on the end where I needed forgiveness and have recieved it. I know that those involved could have only forgiven me through His power and His grace I did receive and am so grateful for it.
I think that makes us quicker to forgive others. I'm almost excited to forgive them as He did me. I can tell you are the same way.
Isn't it a relief to know that we are what we are? No hiding it ... just knowing we are forgiven and loved.
I wish people that haven't yet received the Lord understood how wonderful His plan was.
I have to say that I must STAND and APPLAUD you. I can't say for sure, but I think I may have gotten into my vehicle went wherever he was and done who knows what to him and that woman! The unmitigated audacity of them!
Alright ~ it was probably good that there was some distance at the time between you, him, and her.
Some things just make be FURIOUS! This is one of them. [The children] -- I always think of the children in situations like this. And adults are not made of iron either. It is hard to bare. It is much easier to do radical things when children are not involved -- even though it is not advised. It is NOT good to go crazy on someone over anything and forget about the children -- or yourself for that matter. Afterwards, there is a price to pay. In a moment of ANGER, many people have totally messed up the rest of their lives. The same holds true for moments of untamed lust, actions, words.
One thing I do know -- Everyone reaps what they sow. I do not doubt that at all.
FORGIVENESS . . . this is something that must be learned on various levels in various ways. Inherent in all of us, but sometimes difficult to fully grasp a hold of.
You're right Glome -- it takes the mighty hand of God to accomplish FORGIVENESS on a level that actually HEALS.
Thank you for this Discussion. And, thank you for sharing a HUGE part of yourself with us.
Thank you for enjoying the thread. That means a lot to me.
Even though, I must say ~ it is rare when I don't care. ~ ahahahh!
Okay ~ Glome ~ I'll work on my INTENSITY level. Thank you for pointing that out. {Heading for the SPA!}
Your personality has always seemed so sweet. It doesn't all add up.
But, in "Ears to Hear", the Bible study before 'Enemy' we learned not to draw any conclusions until you have the facts :), so I guess I should wait till you answer. Ha ha.
Even if they were jealous you would think relationships would have matured by now. But then my Mother in Law never did like me. Or any of the women her 3 sons married; and she never got over it. I can't imagine how people do that.
Do you all see each other at holidays etc?
Sounds like you have quite a story to tell. Have you an article on this? I'll go to your site and see. From what I can tell on Gather, you've done a good job staying encouraged without their help :)
I’m just stopping by to share some