The Spiral That Is Life. (updated 11/12/08 8:03PM EDT.)

Penned: 11/12/2008

Some think that life is seen as a linear approach. You are born, live for a predetermined time frame, (either the deity of your choice decides or it’s a matter of fate and random chance) you serve your purpose, and then you die. You go into the earth or are cremated (depending on the wishes of your family and the person deceased.) Your friends and Family mourn you for a predetermined amount of time, Hours, Days, Months, or even several years. Eventually they get on with their life. Death is a natural process like Birth, love-making, breathing, and eating. Its as inevitable as having to pay taxes. Still, rather it is inevitable or not it hurts a lot when someone you were close to passes on.

Depending on your religious viewpoint, If you are a Christian; when you die, you go to the pearly gates presumably to be judged by the big guy himself. If you are deemed to have lived a righteous and moral life and served Your Lord Jesus Christ well. You will be rewarded paradise in Heaven, a place to rest, to be one with the divine and a chance to catch up with other loved ones long since gone. If however, you are deemed to have not honored Your God Properly, If you have lived a life that Christians deem “sinful” in anyway and you had not atoned for such acts. Then you will be condemned to the fiery pits of Hell, where you will spend an eternity atoning for your actions and will never get to taste the sweet fruit of basking in the presence of the Divine Creator God of Christianity. Of course we don’t want to think about this unsavory part of the Afterlife, do we? Still other sects hold alternative views, some feel that Hell is only temporary, where you go for a predetermined timeframe until God feels you have paid for your sins and then you will be allowed into Heaven. And still other’s think that after death our souls go into a hibernation of sorts until the Second Coming of Christ. And Then at that time will the souls be judged and allowed into Heaven or not. It just depends on the positions of your Denomination, Church, Pastor, and You and your set of personal beliefs.

Still other’s of other religious beliefs hold their own interpretations of the Afterlife. Some beliefs, such as Wicca believe in the concept of reincarnation, still even among the Wiccans not all believe that. I think even among religious groups it comes down to personal interpretation and belief.

However, it seems we all can agree that the spirit of our loved ones will live on like an eternal candle burning bright in our hearts and memories.

As I stated earlier, some believe that Life is a linear cycle we go from point A to Point B, and that is it. But Others, like The Wiccans I talked about earlier see life as a Cycle, a Cycle of Birth, Life, Death, and Then Rebirth again. We only have to look outside to see these changes. I look outside at the time of this writing and I see the cold depths of Winter set in and take hold of not only our barren land but also our hearts and spirits. However, don’t fret because the promise of Spring time and of sunshine, and flowers, and sweet scents in the air is just around the corner. Fire may burn and destroy but at the same time it can cleanse and purify. Just look at the explosion of Mt. St. Helen, the volcanic eruption destroyed that natural wildlife and scenery roughly twenty some years ago. But now if you look at that same area it’s as beautiful as ever. Death can be a bitter pill to swallow, but it’s necessary. Just because we know that it is necessary that doesn’t make it any easier. But maybe if we can understand death and understand that the Divine has created it to serve its noble purpose, maybe that understanding can help us to heal our emotional wounds that we may be harboring today.

I readily admit that when it comes to the notion of the afterlife that I am a bit Agnostic, in the fact that I don’t know what happens to a spirit at the time of death. I really don’t think anyone can honestly say for certain what happens to us at the time of death. That is between Us and God, the all knowing divine force. Our best bet is speculation and guess work, and yes Faith. No Matter ones beliefs, they all require a bit of faith. Don’t get me wrong, I have my own set of personal spiritual beliefs, and though I may not exactly know what happens to my soul at the time of death, I have Faith. Faith that the Divine will take care of me and protect me. Maybe I’ll waltz into Heaven and drink some wine with the big guy himself, or maybe I’ll go to Hell for my transgressions. Maybe I’ll be reincarnated as a quaint little butterfly, or a mighty Lion. Maybe I’ll raise a glass in honor of all the fallen brethren I know in the halls of Vahalla, where The Ancient Norse believed that hero’s and brave soldiers went when they died in glorious battle. Who knows? Only God knows where I will end up. But no matter what I have Faith. Why am I talking about Death and the afterlife? Well recently I felt the sting of passing. I found out Monday night that my Grandmother passed away at sixty-one years young. I got off work when I heard the news via a telephone call from my mom and later on from my dad. It hurt me, It still hurts me. Mainly because I had to find out second hand and that I could not be there when she took her final breath. It hurts because I didn’t get to tell her how much I loved her or that I was sorry for not being around much lately because I’ve been too busy working and trying to live my own life and trying to carve out my place and position in life as a man. In fact, it hurts me to think that not only did I not spend enough time with my grandmother, I hardly talk to any of my family, except when I see them at work, or if I need a ride, or if they wanted to find out something from me or whatever the reason may be. It made me come to a realization that all of us, as a whole, the entire human race, in this computer age, of the hussle and bustle, we’re too busy living our own lives, to busy to pick up a phone, or send an e-mail, or a text message to let someone close to us know that we are thinking of them. It saddens me to think that our culture has de-evolved to such a level that we put family way down on the list of priorities. I’m hoping that by writing this letter/essay/confession whatever you wish to call it. That it may help me to rid my guilt. The guilt I feel for aiding this travesty of not holding the family in high regard, the travesty that we are all guilty of from time to time. I don’t know if they’ll get to read this or not. Or if I’ll ever get to tell them this or not. But I hope one day I can muster up the courage and the strength to let them know that I love them, I’m thinking of them, and that I’m sorry that I’m selfish and am too busy doing my own thing to pick up a phone and call just to catch up. I especially hope that my grandmother will forgive me for not letting her know how much she meant to me, and for her to know how sorry I was I wasn’t able to visit her as much as maybe I would have liked to…or as much as maybe I should have. Of course I know that my grandmother would not want me to feel guilty, or sad. And that I know that she loved me all the same.

Some of the positive things that have came out of this is that I am able to write this and to air my feelings and say the things I’ve always felt like I should have said, that needed to be said.

And Also, I know that my grandma is not suffering any more, she had a long list of health problems. Ranging from Diabetes, Neuropathy, Congestive Heart Failure, Repertory Issues, the general aches and pains of getting old, and most recently had kidney trouble and was on dialysis. When I mentioned Faith earlier, I must also mention that I have Faith in the fact that I know my Grandma was a self-professed Christian and believed that Jesus Christ was her Lord and Savior, and I have comfort that in knowing that, that she is in Heaven with her parents, My Nanny and Pa-paw, smiling down on us now.

Maybe if the Wiccan beliefs are true, her life-cycle will once again come full circle and she will come back to be with us once again. Only God Knows, Right?

However, I think that she would want us to remember her in the state she is in now, that she is happy, and without suffering wherever her soul may be. She would want us to not mourn her loss, but celebrate her life. And to remember all the positive memories we’ve had of her. She would want us to cry her a river, but then, to build a bridge and quickly get over it. Though it’s easier said then done, perhaps it is what needs to be done. We need to be happy and positive and optimistic about all of this. And know that it was her time, that her Lord Jesus called her to be with him and her parents. And to know that she isn’t in pain anymore or suffering from her ailments. I know that it will be hard. It will be. Especially difficult with the holidays just around the corner, now who are we going to have to complain to us that we’ve left wrapping paper all over the living room floor? Or that someone left the turkey in the oven too long? It will be rough, no one said it wouldn’t, and if they did then they are a liar. However, time will soon heal our wounds. We will Soon step back into the Spiral Dance, and the cycle of life will come full circle. Though we mourn now, soon we will be back to our old selves again, and we will be celebrating this beautiful thing known as life. And you know what? Grandma wouldn’t want it any other way. So let’s stand up, wipe those tears away, stop mourning, and start celebrating.

Thank You.

In Loving memory of my Grandma: Linda Lou 1947- 11/10/2008.



Great Mother Goddess, Great Father God: Though my grandmother was a life-long Christian, she was open and accepting of other's so long as they were accepting of her. With that essence, I humbly ask that you watch over her and protect her in her transition to the afterlife. and give her the strength for either her eternal rest or to prepare her for her re-birth. Whichever the Universal-Divine deigns fit for her. And Great Cosmic Parents watch over those of us who mourn her loss. Give us patience to understand what has happened. Compassion to accept it. and Strength to help us in the days, months, and years ahead, in dealing with this loss in the appropriate manner. So Mote It Be! and Blessed Be! - Penned By Me. 11/12/2008



Prayer for Calm and Comfort

With your soothing fingers,
wipe away the lines that worries have etched on our faces.
Surround us with calm,
let us rest in the glow of peace,
as if we were encircled with the Moon’s own light.
Let our concerns and tensions drain away from us,
pouring as water into your Earth.

- Ceisiwr Serith

Source: "A Book of Pagan Prayer" © 2002 Ceisiwr Serith. Reprinted with permission of Red Wheel/Weiser.

Source: BeliefNet.com - Prayer Archive.

Prayer for the Deceased

Go your way to the land of the Ancestors,
where they wait for you with open arms,
there on the edge between this world and the next.
See; there they stand.
Ancestral spirits, welcome this one
to the place where we all must go.

- Ceisiwr Serith

Source: "A Book of Pagan Prayer" © 2002 Ceisiwr Serith. Reprinted with permission of Red Wheel/Weiser.

Source: BeliefNet.com - Prayer Archive.

A Returning to Mother Earth

Naked you came
from Earth the Mother.
Naked you return to her.
May a good wind be your road.

- Omaha (Native American) prayer

Source:BeliefNEt.com- Prayer Archive.

Honoring the Dead

From the dawn of your birth To the sunset of your death I honor you. From the missions you completed To your duties left undone I honor you. From the seasons of your being Through the cycle of your life I honor you. From your time beyond the veil Lie your entrance back again May the angels support you May my healing love reach you From this moment until the end of time So Mote It Be. - Silver RavenWolf Source: BeliefNet.com - Prayer Archive.

Prayer for Those Who Mourn

Bless those who mourn, eternal God,
with the comfort of your love
that they may face each new day with hope
and the certainty that nothing can destroy
the good that has been given. May their memories become joyful,
their days enriched with friendship,
and their lives encircled by your love.
Amen.

- Vienna Cobb Anderson

Adapted from "Prayers of Our Hearts" © 1991 Vienna Cobb Anderson. Reprinted with permission of the author.

Source: BeliefNet.com-Prayer Archive.

Prayer for Healing

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes;
and there shall be no more death,
neither sorrow, nor crying,
neither shall there be any more pain:
for the former things are passed away.

- Revelation 21:4
The Bible (King James Version)

Source: BeliefNet.com - Prayer Archive.

I Am Not There
(A Friend of mine on Myspace posted this to me.)

Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there, I did not die.

-Attributed to poet/prose writer Joyce Fossen.


Some of you may ask, what is the purpose of me writing this? are you supposed to empathize and mourn my loss with me, or are you supposed to raise a glass and help me to toast her life. and I say: both.

That's what I think a funeral is all about.

mourn the loss.

but then celebrate the life.

Of course I identify myself as a Pagan so I look for any excuse to throw a party :-) hah.



This is a Repost, the other article is deleted. as I added some thinggs to this one. and also I don't think I posted it at a propper peak time for maximum viewing. Thanx.