Same gender relationships . . .

Selene said it better than I ever could!

First and foremost, I would like to say I do respect others views,even when they disagree with my own. There is plenty of proof that, children can be raised, to be respectful and well adjusted adults, even in a two parent home, of same gender. It is the love, compassion, and caring, that counts, not the gender of the parent or guardian. I as a gay mom have proved that, and so have many other gay couples. There are those single mom and dads, who too have proved this as well. Families can be diverse, and still raise a happy, and well adjusted child.

Wow, how many misconceptions (no pun intended) and cliches can someone fit into one short post?

First misconception, just because a person prefers to have a committed relationship with someone of the same sex (gender is a whole different issue) does not necessarily mean they don't want anything to do with people of the other sex.

BTW, sex is the physical aspect of a person and gender is the internal, the way they think/act/feel/behave.

Why should a heterosexual couple who can't conceive (some would say it's Gods will, if you want to introduce religion into this) be treated differently than a homosexual couple? For physical reasons conception can't happen.

Should a male (sex) who is effemiate (gender) acting or a female (sex) who is masculine acting or a "tomboy" (gender) be denied the opportunity to raise children because they don't pass the "norm" test?

Which is worse, having a child in a loving, stable homosexual home or a heterosexual home where one or the other (or both) parents are abusive (sexually, mentally, emotionally or physically), neglectful, often drunk or under the influence of other chemicals or otherwise mistreated? Now, I'm not trying to imply that all homosexual couples are perfect nor all heterosexual couples aren't, but there are enough "straight" dysfunctional to the detriment of the child(ren) homes that this is a valid point.

Gay parents do a fine job. It is important to realize that children need nurturing and love. A heterosexual child in the home of homosexual parents can have just as good a foundation as the homosexual child in the home of heterosexual parents. My experience has been that those gay and lesbian couples who want children do a fine job. They don't have accidents like heterosexual couples do. So, they put more thought into their parenting experience.

I think as long as a couple is capable of caring for children, they should be allowed to adopt them. Regardless of sexual preference.

"A whole raising experience," or "just one raising experience?"

I think there should be options. Children who are raised in diverse families will grow up to better understand different types of lifestyles, and they will grow up to be more tolerent. Just because it takes an egg and a sperm for the biological procreation of children doesn't mean that gender really matters in raising them. As long as those children are loved, that's all that counts.

Selene you did have both and that is all I am really saying so that a child can learn to appreciate each gender. I thank you so much for shining in this moment of my weakness of not understanding the true nature of the 'child-rearing scenario' . . . yes nurturing, compassion and discipline are by far the most important elements of child-raising and those were obviously provided to you.

To Slyphian M-- when you state, "BTW, sex is the physical aspect of a person and gender is the internal, the way they think/act/feel/behave"--, I disagree because based on my undergraduate and post-graduate studies of the human psyche and development both sexually and psychologically, the term 'sex' is a physical act NOT the physical identification of a person. On many forms a person must fill out for a variety of reasons--job applications, social security forms, taxes etc the answer to whether you are male or female is asked, which sex are you? Wrong, it should state which gender are you and do you have sex ? . . . See how government has taught us wrong even when it comes to deciding what we are !

Well, I guess we could debate this all day and then some! Yes, sex is also a physical activity as well as being the physical traits.

Gender is the way society expects people of a particular sex to behave and the way a person identifies themselves internally, and is often reflected in the way they behave/act.

If a male identifies himself with the feminine gender, wants to play with dolls, wear dresses and make up, etc. He is said to be transgendered, not transsexed. After he goes through the process to become female (hormones, etc) and the surgery at that point he becomes a transsexual.

Before (and probably after) the surgery this person is diagnosed with Gender Identity Disorder (GID) which is defined as:

Gender identity disorder is a conflict between a person's actual physical gender and the one they actually identify him or herself as. For example, a person identified as a boy may actually feel and act like a girl.

People with gender identity disorder may act and present themselves as members of the opposite sex. The disorder may affect:

* Choice of sexual partners
* Display of feminine or masculine mannerisms, behavior, and dress
* Self-concept

Gender identity disorder is not the same as homosexuality.

Identity issues can occur in many situations and appear in different ways. For example, some people with normal genitalia and sexual characteristics (such as breasts) of one gender privately identify more with the other gender.

Some people may cross-dress, and some may seek sex-change surgery. Others are born with ambiguous genitalia, which can raise identity issues.

(source: http://www.healthline.com/adamcontent/gender-identity-disorder?utm_term=gender&utm_medium=mw&utm_campaign=article)

Also, when a child is born what is asked? What sex is the baby or what gender?

Slyphian--please get out of the DSM III idealogy that pigeonholes individuals and really only labels someone incorrectly. I took psychology for many years and have a masters degree in the field, your terms and identification are not correct. But to each his or her own and thats why things are not right these days . . .

Interesting. I used the links to support the concept that sex and gender ARE different. It's more than "DSM III idealogy" involved though. Though I am sure the people with Doctorates degrees who compiled the DSM III will be happy to know that they are wrong.

You used the term "same gender couples". So if you take a traditional marriage between one physical male and one physical female but the female is also male gendered (works on cars, hangs out at bars and gets into fights, and does mostly traditional male activities and very few to none of the traditional female ones) would you consider this a "normal" and "healthy" environment to raise children? A place where they have the "whole raising experience that has both a woman and a man present to guide them in a direction allowing them to make choices effectively when they are all grown up" ?

Or, conversely, where the male is very effeminate, cooking, cleaning, shopping, etc. with very little of the traditional male activities?

I'm still waiting to hear on why a traditional marriage with one "normal" male and one "normal" female but where the male abuses the children or the female is out getting drunk or whoring around (or swap dysfunctions if you want) is healthier for the children than being raised in a loving stable same sex union.

Why should fertility treatments be for the sole benefit of heterosexual couples who can't conceive? Do not homosexual couples also pay taxes and insurance premiums that help support the research and operation of fertility treatments? Why should they be relegated to second class citizens?

Leaving a 10 as my comment!

Erica, read the article and debate. Not sure how I feel about it honestly, it is something I never really thought about. I think it would depend on the people involved. Are they kind and loving parents? If so then I don't think genders should matter. There are aunts/uncles/friends/teachers to provide role models of both sides. I think the fact that there is still so much prejudice to couples such as these could be damaging to the kids making them feel "different" etc. I was a single parent from the time my daughter was three weeks old and my ex tried to kill me! When she got to preschool she always asked "where is my daddy?, when do i get to have a daddy" etc and questions like that. I think there would be a lot of questions and the parents would have to handle it maturely and honestly and openly. I hate it that there is so much prejudice in the world.

Homosexual parents are capable of providing the same love and protection as Straight parents and in some cases they are even better. Sorry but I have to agree with Selene.