Well, I have been going through a divorce for the past couple of months.. I really don't want to get into details, but we are still talking without yelling for now that is anyways...
Well, my time was up with the use of the vehicle he owns since we are now living closer by 20 miles to go grocery shopping and getting to doctors appointments... I am sure there are gonna be times that I will have to call on him to take the kids to docs and stuff but hopefully I wont need him much at all... I am planning on using my own 2 feet as the need arises.. that does mean making the kids walk or ride their bikes also.. I do plan on getting a bike but may have to wait until spring time to purchase one as funding right now is just not there...
So, I am looking forward to seeing how much weight i lose by summer and during the summer due to the fact that I will be riding my bike everywhere.. even to church on sundays... I am actually looking forward to it... its more of a forced weight loss program for myself...lol.. and if i lose weight then maybe i can get off some of the meds im on for diabetes...
ok i know im not talking any nonsense or giving much details, but it helps sometimes to just sit and type my thoughts as they come... organizing how I am gonna do things... it puts it all in perspective for me and keeps things so i dont go bonkers...lol...
As for the divorce.. dont be sorry.. it should have happened years ago... and i am not upset at this point at all.. I guess i took the past few months before even seperating to learn to deal with it and come to terms that it was inevitable, so when it finally happened it was not like a shock to me and I could keep things straight and move forward in life.. The kids seem to be doing ok, but with dad not being there much for them .. not even visiting much, who knows the long haul effect that will be on them.. I have told him that if he wants longer summer visitations, then he has to start taking them now on a more regular basis.. our youngest who is 4 is special needs and needs a strict schedule. which dad will not follow through on.. and then it takes me weeks to get him back on track.. so argh.. it will be a mess ... there is no set visitation schedule with the courts so that could work in my favor ...
with all this going on.. I just need to keep one thing in perspective.. that God is and must stay #1 in my life and my children's lives and he will make it all work out for the best....
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Comments: 12
God will provide you with the strength as you remember to provide the faith. It sounds like you have the fortitude, compassion, and understanding that you and your children are loved by Our Father, the one that really counts.
I admire you're commitment to get well by walking and biking. The kids will surely learn a lot from your power of example in so many ways.
and Claudia.. you are so right.. they will learn by example that sitting around does not bring things to you, but when you go and get what you want, everything is just a reach away..
I'm sure thing will turn out alright...I have faith.
I did find a bike on freecycle.. we have enough clothes.. we are just in a transition stage and need to get through this little brook in the valley.. in a couple of months things will b much better and not seem so down...
God will keep us a float.. it really dont hurt my kids to learn that they dont need to eat 3 or 4 large helpings of food then polish off what their broter and sister refuse to eat... so they are not really going hungry.. ok the younger 2 have been hungrier lately as they refuse to eat at diner time.. but that i cannot help as they refuse to eat like tonights pot pie... they did eat the buiscuts though.. so they got something..
we will be ok .. God will take care of us.. sometimes we have to go through a lesson to learn something inthe near future and that is waht im working on now..