Top 10 Reasons to Appreciate Sarah Palin

The very mention of the name Sarah Palin has the ability for some to become intoxicated with glee and for others to wince in unbearable mental pain. In spite of the differences some may have with her, I found that after careful consideration, there are many reasons to be thankful for Sarah Palin. The reasons may not be the ones you were expecting. This article is not about how Sarah Palin elevates women or how she rides the maverick express. Nor is it an attempt to seriously look at where she stands on the issues, or whether she doesn't believe in dinosaurs. I will save that commentary for the true political pundits and write about the top ten reasons why Sarah Palin should have our gratitude.

1. She Robbed Fran Drescher of the Most Annoying Voice Award

Sarah Palin's voice has that special quality of sending shivers down the spine when she puts on her best folksy, Alaskan wilderness accent with extra whine. Fran Drescher, known for her uniquely annoying Long Island accented voice, is yesterday's news now. Once the queen of annoying voices, Fran sounds tolerable these days. Sarah Palin's voice even wipes out the long echoed voice of Edith Bunker, whose voice stood out every weeknight that Archie Bunker aired during the 1970's.

2. Sarah Rebeled Against the Power Pantsuit

Hillary Clinton may be known for wearing power pantsuits to play in a male-dominated world, but Sarah Palin brought the power skirt with her when she skipped in from Alaska. Women can now show some leg and still be taken seriously. Or almost taken seriously. I sincerely thank Sarah Palin for this daring act, because I have always been more of a "skirt woman" than a "pants woman."

3. The Bridge to Nowhere

Sarah Palin brought forth the Bridge to Nowhere. Though such a bridge attempt did exist, it's the symbolic phrase that I cling to now. "The bridge to nowhere" can be used to describe any failed project where that you once supported but no longer find to be a good idea. I can now use the phrase to describe a few of my past relationships. "Dating him was just one big bridge to nowhere." Another way to use the phrase is to throw it out anytime you want to flip flop on an idea.
4. The Bush Doctrine

The Bush Doctrine, once only understood by Washington legislators and high-up officials, is now public information. When Sarah Palin failed to answer what the Bush Doctrine meant during an interview, the world took notice. The end result is that now Americans, who knew that was what President Bush was probably up to anyway, now know the technical terms for the policy.

5. Gotcha Questions

Until the media threw a few "gotcha questions" at Sarah Palin during one of her few interviews, I never knew what a "gotcha question" was. The "gotcha question" is now a pop culture symbol for asking tough questions like, "What newspapers or magazines do you read on a regular basis?"

6. Saturday Night Live has Never Been Better

Since Tina Fey did a return to Saturday Night Live to portray Sarah Palin, the ratings have skyrocketed and those of us old enough to remember the glory days of SNL in the late 70's and 80's are once again looking forward to Saturday night. Tina Fey is a master at portraying the many quirks of the real Sarah Palin, and for that we are guaranteed Saturday night belly laughs, at least until election season is over.

7. Doggonit!

Sarah Palin should be thanked for giving Americans a new, cuter phrase, to shout out in frustration. Instead of the former "darn its" and "damn its" I once used to express my dismay or frustration under my breath, I can now shout out "doggonits" until the neighbors hear me. In fact, "doggonit" may even make you laugh a little when you try to say it with a serious face.

8. Say it Ain't So Joe

In the Vice Presidential Debate, Sarah Palin created the catchy response, "Say it ain't so Joe!" As a response to Joe Biden, this catchy phrase caught on in America. Now I can respond to my Joe Six-Pack neighbor who bagged empties for his Sunday morning case of beer, with a casual, "Say it ain't so Joe!" The phrase can also be used by McCain's vetting committe when they talk to "Joe the Plumber." The "say it ain't so" should be said after Joe reveals that he was asking a hypothetical question about taxes, or when he admits to owing back taxes.

9. Banned Books are Hot Now
The allegatation that Sarah Palin once battled with the Wasilla librarian over the prospect of having books banned was enough to create a new love for reading banned books. After the issue of book banning became public knowledge, reading increased at high schools across the country. As a result, most 9th graders are more literate now than Sarah Palin.

10. Winking as a New Way to Connect

Winking is now the suggested method for connecting with others. Once thought to be a method preferred by dirty old men and girls on Girls Gone Wild, Sarah Palin revived the wink and brought the act of winking back down to a perfectly acceptable and conservative method for communicating, and more importantly, connecting. Since the wink became fashionable, I now feel free to wink at Gerry the Garbageman when he picks up my garbage each week, and even Mike the Mailman. So far their wives have not called to complain.