Pride really can go before a fall!

          How many of you have heard that saying, "Pride goes before the fall"? Did you know that it can be very literal too?

Now, I know pride is something I have not been accused of displaying all too often. My weaknesses have always been in other areas. (that gluttony thing gets me every time, and around certain Gather men, maybe a touch of lust too, lol, but let's not go there right now...) However, since I have gotten to the point of being disabled, pride has become a serious issue for me. I don't think we realize how much we value our independence until we lose it. Though I logically know I have a lot to offer somebody, it is hard for me to face the prospect of adding to somebody's burdens too.  Funny part is that I never considered things like that a burden, until it was me. I have always been happy to be able to serve others. Even now, I get fussed at for trying to do things to help others, when I should be "taking care" of myself. My family has never understood that is who I am, and who I want to be. Why do we target and condemn people who want to help others? I have always refused to let others ignorance, hatred and abuse to change fundamentally who I am. My ex-husband couldn't beat it out of me, dishonest people didn't take it away from me, so now this.

I earned myself a wonderful trip to the emergency room on Thursday this week.  We have a festival in town called the Harvest Homecoming. I have not been able to go for a couple of years. I was so looking forward to going this year, when my scooter started acting up. I was so aggravated. I thought about it, and decided, it isn't really that big of a festival, so if I take it one street at a time, sitting down between streets to rest a while, I should be fine. Well, as long as I went in the morning while it was still cool of course. (Heat takes me down faster than just plain walking.) I thought (ok, my first mistake..lol) that I could go first thing the morning they opened, since it was never crowded on Thursday anyway, and I would at least get to see some of it, and maybe even get to enter a free raffle or two. My daughter is working at the Homecoming since she is a director for the color guard, and they earn money through helping with the trash collection for the band and guard. I knew she would be near and my daughter in law would walk with me. I did fairly well, until I was finishing the second street. (Each street is a block) I knew I was not doing well when the temp. felt like it jumped about 20 degrees. I got to a spot to sit, and Amanda got a drink for me. I realized that I wasn't cooling off any, so my daughter called my son, who promptly started fussing about me going without him anyway. By the time he got there, I knew I needed to leave, but I was in the middle, so I had to get to a point that he could meet me with the car. The closest point was a long block away. With his help, I made it to a bench on the corner, while he went for the car. I knew I was close to being in trouble. I got some water and could barely hold it, so I took a paper towel, soaked it and put it on the back of my neck. This usually cools me down faster than anything. When it wasn't helping much, and my brain was fuzzy, Amanda went to get the paramedics, who weren't far from me. The reason my family didn't get them sooner, is that all it does is create more bills. I know what caused it, and I know what I can do to recover (get home and lay down in a cool place.), I just had to make it that far. By the time my son was able to get there with the car, I knew I would pass out if I tried to stand up. Needless to say, I got out voted by my family, and ended up on a stretcher to the ER. I have spent the last few days exhausted and sleeping a lot, which is what happens usually only after I pass out, which tells me how dumb I really behaved. I am really working on the whole pride issue now, because I know, especially in my case, it will certainly lead to a fall....