My Stepmother passed away

My Stepmother passed away on September 7th and her funeral was on September 17th. Right after she passed, I talked to my dad a lot. I haven't always seen eye to eye with my dad. He's the kind of man who if anything happens, it's never his fault, it's yours. In my 20's, all I was estranged from him because it was hard to handle having a relationship with him. A couple of years ago or so, we started talking again and I just have to try to remember to take what he says as a grain of salt. He also slips and will start saying crud about my Mom, which of course irks me and her both because 99.9 of it is lies.

With that aside, I talked to him daily for over a week (now that it's over, we haven't talked that much, he's trying to get stuff taken care of,etc). He lives in a town close to Bakersfield, about 45 minutes away. That's where the funeral was. I asked my grandparents to take me and they did.

The funeral was a family reunion of sorts. I haven't seen my dad's side of the family for years (for valid reasons). I was raised an only child but I have 1 half sister and 1 offical half brother and another half brother that has never been DNA tested to be my half brother but it's a family joke on that side that he is my Dad's son (I really believe he is my half brother.  His Mom was married to my dad, then left my dad for his brother).

I felt a little uncomfortable because they didn't like my Mom so their feelings in turn went to not liking me. My half sister has tried to have a relationship with me over the years and we've mostly talked by email but I did extend the olive branch and invited her to my son's birthday party last Sunday and she came with her two kids, my niece and nephew. I plan on pursuing that and see where it leads.  My 'Official" half brother was nice to me but very touchy feely which was weird (you would have to have been there to see it). My roommate/friend saw the pictures of the three of us together that I requested be taken and she said if you look at his eyes, it looks like he may have been "tweeking" aka on drugs. Which I know he used to use drugs before so anything is possible. My non official half brother was polite but a bit more standoffish.

I could go on and on with other stories. Let's just say there are reasons my Mom tried to keep me away from that side of the family. I won't lie though, sometimes I wish I'd been raised knowing my siblings better.

Well I just meant to post some pictures instead of typing a long article. These are some pictures from my Stepmother's funeral. She was a nice woman. She talked a lot but I never saw her be mean once. Her twin sister was there and let's just say it was weird to see her twin looking and sounding like her. Her twin sister was really nice though. She said she wanted to meet me because Darlene always always had nice things to say about her.

I am very sad that Darlene has passed on. I think she was a right fit for my dad. They could handle each other's bull and still seemed to care for each other.     

The service was in the chapel but afterwards, everyone went to where her final resting place would be.





Taft is a small place but I was still surprised when I looked at a headstone and it happened to be my friends ex mother in law that passed away earlier this year. I only looked at one headstone and it happened to be that one.




In the first row, that is one of Darlene's sisters (she came from a big family), then you can see part of my dad and part of Darlene's twin sister (above)

The man standing up is an uncle of mine, the girl either my niece of cousin (her father is the one that may or may not be my half brother. Sounds really funky doesn't it) and the woman standing next to her is my cousin (and also my half sisters sister).


My dad with Darlene's twin sister, Arlene behind him.


The girl in the center is my 13 year old niece

The man at the side is my "half brother/cousin" It never gets any better when I type that phrase.

My dad holding the child. Off to the side is his brother who is married to my dad's 1st ex wife



People took flowers after the funeral. My niece is the one at the end.





My half sister and my dad



My half brothers

My dad and grandpa at the lunch provided by the Moose Club.

Since I thought I may never have this chance again, I requested that a picture be taken with my half siblings. My grandma took the first few and managed to take some when none of us were read. My grandpa took the last one.






So it was an interesting day... Sad because Darlene passed on and a little strange to see people that were related to me that I don't know.