I just realized what I've done wrong in my marriage!
Doug and I should have created and signed a contract before we got married. Not a prenup, but an actual contract dealing with our personal issues.
I love that man with all that I am, but he can drive me insane at times. That's bound to happen when two people live together, in love or not. He can really irritate the heck out of me sometimes. If I had prepared a contract, then I could have forced him to stop those annoying little things for breach of contract.
Why didn't I think of this sooner?
Here are some of the things I would have put in the contract:
1. Melanie takes the trash out on sunny, warm days. Doug takes the trash out during inclement weather. *This is subject to modification once the children have reached the age where they become chore performing, complaining, teen-aged slaves to their parents.
2. In return, Melanie will not complain about Doug's inability to unroll his socks after he takes them off. However, Melanie reserves the right to refuse to unroll them. If they come out of the wash unclean, that's Doug's problem.
3. Melanie is allowed 5 days a month to be cranky, eat disgusting amounts of ice-cream and chocolate, be whiny, and lay around with a heating pad. Doug, as the husband, is required to put up with this in a very caring way. In addition, Doug is never, ever, allowed to mention the disgusting amounts of ice-cream and chocolate that go into Melanie's mouth.
4. The children are not young Marines. They will not be treated as such, except for the following occasions:
* If they totally humiliate their parents in any type of public place, boot-camp style discipline is allowed.
* If they perform our pet-peeve and leave a light on when they leave a room, 10 pushups are allowed.
* If they aren't listening, Marinespeak terms such as, "eyes!", "ears!", "are we tracking?", etc... will be allowed.
*If they come to us in pain but with no visible blood, missing limbs, or trauma, we are allowed to ask them, "Are you injured or are you just hurt?".
5. Doug agrees never to comment on Melanie's feminine rituals and habits. If she decides to let her eyebrows grow out, Brook Shields circa 1985 style, then he will not comment.
6. In return, Melanie agrees to try very hard not to make fun of Doug's hilarious facial expressions.
I'm sure I could add to the list for hours, but this would have been a great start! Seriously, why, oh why, didn't I think of this before the vows were said?
What would you put in your contract, had you created one before getting married?
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Comments: 29
Hubby shall not bug me when I am writing or on the internet!
1. Travis will not use the very pretty end table in the living room as his dumping ground!
2. Travis will keep all of his hotwheels he insists on collecting in the garage. Hence is why we bought a house with a garage.
3. Travis will not only scream at our son as forms of punishment. Try to be creative here dear.
4. Travis will not complain incessantly about anything and everything 24/7
I too don't want to go on too long so here we are.
Gather Broadcasting: Have it your way
Yes! 35
A link in the email will bring more readers...
Year one of their marriage, they both voted for my uncle.
Year two, they both voted for my aunt.
Year three, they each voted for themselves. As sitting president, my aunt broke the tie and has been president ever since. They just celebrated their 50th anniversary.
but waht about the bodily functions like belching abd farting?????
i'm a marine too
Semper Fi
Don't let the small things become important. I see to many young couples spend to much time on the things that really are no big deal. One of my friends complains about the garage just take it out yourself.
Money causes a lot of divorces remember not everyone saves in the same way. My husband believes bonds are great and I stocks, so we have both.
Politics can cause major arguments when one is a Republican and the other a Democrat. I am aware that one side is not always right and its important to be able to admit this truth.
One good tool that I like to use in marriage counseling is the CouplesCheckup (.com). It is an effective, inexpensive way to learn about yourselves in the privacy of your own home. It's geared for couples who are dating, engaged, or have been married for years. And with Valentines Day approaching (the day with the most wedding proposals of the year), the publishers are celebrating by cutting the cost to less than $20.
I talk a lot about expectations and "the good-enough marriage" in my book "Of Sound Mind to Marry". It's very important to have this conversation, and I like the way you've started it here. Thanks for taking the time to write.
Jim Bierman, PhD
My husband drives me nuts too, sometimes. But he is good to me, great to my children and grandchildren, never fails to make me laugh, is a wonderful cook and he always puts the toilet seat down!!