Humor For Today

A very dirty little boy came in from playing in the yard and asked his mother, "Who am I?"

Playing along, his mother replied, "I don't know! Who are you?"

"WOW!" cried the child. "Mrs. Johnson was right! She said I was so dirty, my own mother wouldn't recognize me!

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A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and is told, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."

The frog says, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party?"

"No," says the psychic. "Next semester in her biology class."

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The two young boys were discussing their ailments together in the children's ward.

"Are you medical or surgical?" asked the first, who had been in the ward for a week.

"I don't know what you mean," replied the second.

"It's simple," replied the first. "Were you sick when you came in here? Or did they make you sick when you got here?"

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On vacation, a woman and her husband had to make an emergency visit to a dentist.

"I want a tooth pulled," the woman demanded. "And don’t bother with the Novocain either, because we’re really in a hurry. Just take out the tooth and we’ll be on our way."

The dentist was impressed. "You’re certainly a very brave woman! Which tooth is it?"

The woman pushed her husband forward. "Show him your tooth, dear."