(Fake) Tom's warning that his so-called Army would invade Gather Island on Wednesday did not go unheeded by the residents of this sunny (fake) isle.
Granted, his warning was polite (he even rescheduled from Tuesday to avoid a possible Belgian conflict), and also granted, we didn't do much more to defend ourselves beyond oiling up the pool boys and ordering an extra round of drinks, but still, the Island has prevailed.

At 1:02, when I got back from lunch (buffalo chicken wrap, not bad, sauce kind of iffy, and really, it took too long, but thanks for asking), Mr. Roarke and I surveyed the island resources. He commanded a recount of drink umbrellas, setting some aside to be used as weapons (you can put someone else's eye out, but you have to be really close) just in case. Ann C., our Chief Entertainment Officer, rallied up a chorus of "nanner nanner foo foos" to be ready if needed (good job, Ann), and when (Fake) Tom's (Fake) Army sailed up in their skiffs (all 42 of them, but crowded into only five skiffs) (money's tight) (and they like to be close), all our relaxed Island forces had to do was say, "Hey... want a drink? They're on the house," and it was all over in about seven minutes.
So... as coups go, it was kind of a non-event. (Fake) Tom muttered something about next quarter, when their new budget would go into effect, and his machine will be calling Mr. Roarke's machine in a few weeks to get it all straightened out. Then he asked for a fresh sloe gin fizz, and settled back into the nearest lounge chair.
Back to relaxing, everyone!




Comments: 75 ( 1 removed by Tracy Fabre )
So sorry I did not get to use my "nanner nanner foo foo"!!!
nanner nanner foo foo
nanner nanner foo foo
get Michelle in here, Ann!
Can't even keep up with my own daughter!!
I was thinking southern politics -- vote early, vote often --- as in, join early, join often!
And now that I think about it, I'm one of those 42! So I should revise the article -- 41 people in 5 skiffs.
Almost typed that as goat. Get out of the goat, too.
(and then the tide comes in)
I feel wet
But don't tell anyone.
I've summoned my cabana boy since we are actually having sun today in the Seattle area... Alas, I think Rob Appell may have absconded them all!
You just can't get good help these days.
Better get back to editing - you know how good I am at that, you better make my drink a double!
Shakes paper bag covered fist in a menacing fashion
All the best,
(Fake) Tom Gerace, (Fake) CEO
Thanks for the drop-in, (Fake) Tom. I look forward to our next (fake) engagement.
Rob -- you've done a fine job. Rest now.
Ann -- polish those kazoos.
Jan -- no Taco Hell, though I am partial to the Nachos Bell Grande, stupid name and all.
Peter -- squeeze yourself. You're making the ocean level drop with that Poise coat of yours.
Hey what ever happened to nee neer nee neer boo boo ?
The new recruits (indeterminate) are in cabanas 35-52.
sounds like a party to me!
Excelsior!
All the best,
(Fake) Tom Gerace, (Fake) CEO
The REAL news is that with my newly-upgraded-to-1.5 gig RAM (from 512mb on Monday), the difference in Gather's performance is stunningly ... ZERO! It's still the single slowest website IN THE WORLD! Wow. That I can type an entire sentence before I see it onscreen is... what's the word... what is it... what is it.. oh yeah... PATHETIC!
Hrmph.
ROB! You are allowed to do anything to the pool boys which they AGREE to. Not to dangle a preposition.
Susan -- you were, in fact, There. You are always THERE. You are, as previously established, the Essence of There.
ann c. out!
Now, while I admit that sort of "Island defense" will come in handy for future invasion attempts, I'm not sure we want it in the brochures and travel videos.
If we could train him... set him up as a double agent and send him to (Fake) Tom's Army...
Hmm, I hope (Fake) Tom doesn't come back and read this.
Except a faster Gather (page loading-wise). Grmbl.